Partner Rent Disagreement

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  • getmore4less
    getmore4less Posts: 46,882 Forumite
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    Poor_Single_lady wrote: »
    This thread is really sad. I have a mortgage just in my name and I would not be happy to have a boyfriend living here rent free.
    But neither would I be happy breaking up and having to pay money over. My parents paid my deposit so it would feel like a boy taking my parents money.

    It doesn't seem fair that if you want to stay in your house and live with your boyfriend you are potentially becoming someone's meal ticket.

    I would not let a boyfriend move in that didn't want to pay his way. He should at least want to! But it's not very romantic to draw up an agreement in case of break up. It feels like a situation with no winning side.

    effectively all the agreement does is document your common ground from the discussions you should be having anyway about things like money.

    The real issue is many people don't talk about things have preconceived ideas based on different backgrounds and make assumptions that turn out to be different from the other persons when the crunch comes.

    if you can talk about it you can write it down, we are not talking a Sheldon room mate agreement but things like

    I put down 20% deposit , do I get that back first(interest free loan to the purchase) or do I own 20% of the property?

    (that's the easy one and many get that wrong in their agreements because they did not understand the difference)
  • justme111
    justme111 Posts: 3,508 Forumite
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    Poor_Single_lady wrote: »
    . My parents paid my deposit so it would feel like a boy taking my parents money.
    .

    I think you are over dramatising. Even if he was to ask for something from it and even if he went to court for it and then the court awarded him something (all not very realistic imo) it would not be part of your parents money. It would be part of equity increase corresponding to the years he lived there.
    I think verbal agreement would be upheld in the same way as written in case of dispute if you able to demonstrate that you behaved according to that agreement. So the risks are pretty remote and minor. Asking for a life completely without risks is irreasonable imo. He would also take risks that the house was not going to feel like a home to him and that he may be homeless on a whim. Getting close with someone is always a risk. That is why when we get close with someone it is a statement of their value to us. We prepared to accept the risk because we value that person and want to be with them. For some people who have subsidised life (council house or living with parents) it is even bigger risk...
    The word "dilemma" comes from Greek where "di" means two and "lemma" means premise. Refers usually to difficult choice between two undesirable options.
    Often people seem to use this word mistakenly where "quandary" would fit better.
  • PeacefulWaters
    PeacefulWaters Posts: 8,495 Forumite
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    Get a simple agreement drawn (£200 solicitor bill?) up stating what he's paying for and confirming that he accrues no rights to the property.

    I'd also suggest you include maintenance (structure) which I see as your costs and maintenance (furnishings) which could be shared.

    Enjoy the sex.

    A friend of mine did this and they ended up married a few years later.
  • Gavin83
    Gavin83 Posts: 8,749 Forumite
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    justme111 wrote: »
    Because while they are together money is spent on common enjoyment they would not been able to afford otherwise, not her or his separate financial obligations. It would be divided only if they split.

    Look, I've no issue with someone paying their way in a relationship and agree he should be contributing. However by accepting the contribution the OP has to accept that he'll have a beneficial interest in the property. If she doesn't want that to happen then don't ask for the money.

    She asked for a contribution towards the mortgage, I see no difference doing this than doing what your suggesting.
    PeacefulWaters wrote: »
    Get a simple agreement drawn (£200 solicitor bill?) up stating what he's paying for and confirming that he accrues no rights to the property.

    What for? Either he's only paying for bills and a fair share of relationship related items, in which case he has no interest in the property or he's contributing more, in which case he does have an interest. You can't get a solicitor to draw up an agreement that says he's paying towards the mortgage but gains no interest in the property.
  • justme111
    justme111 Posts: 3,508 Forumite
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    But she does not accept contributions. She goes on holidays paid by him. :) Or has a car paid for by him. Or they have a collection of expensive sex toys:D
    The word "dilemma" comes from Greek where "di" means two and "lemma" means premise. Refers usually to difficult choice between two undesirable options.
    Often people seem to use this word mistakenly where "quandary" would fit better.
  • Kynthia
    Kynthia Posts: 5,668 Forumite
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    People are still missing the fact there must have been a common intention at some point that the non-owning partner would obtain a share if the property. Without that there is no beneficial interest even if the partner pays half the mortgage directly to the lender for years.

    Much of the opinions expressed on this site regarding beneficial interest are scare stories without much accuracy. Everyone commenting should really read this link that explains it properly.
    https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/family/relationship-problems/relationship-breakdown-and-housing/if-you-live-with-your-partner-relationship-breakdown-and-housing/if-you-live-with-your-partner-and-you-own-your-home-relationship-breakdown-and-housing/relationship-breakdown-and-housing-beneficial-interest-if-your-partner-owns-the-home/
    Don't listen to me, I'm no expert!
  • pollyanna24
    pollyanna24 Posts: 4,370 Forumite
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    Put your house up for rent and take all the income from it yourself.

    Then rent a house with your boyfriend where he has to pay half the rent.
    Pink Sproglettes born 2008 and 2010
    Mortgages (End 2017) - £180,235.03
    (End 2021) - £131,215.25 DID IT!!!
    (End 2022) - Target £116,213.81
  • PeacefulWaters
    PeacefulWaters Posts: 8,495 Forumite
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    Gavin83 wrote: »
    What for?
    To clarify what his contributions and rights are after a grown up discussion between them.
    Either he's only paying for bills and a fair share of relationship related items, in which case he has no interest in the property or he's contributing more, in which case he does have an interest.
    And a legal document can confirm this. Whichever way is agreed.
    You can't get a solicitor to draw up an agreement that says he's paying towards the mortgage but gains no interest in the property.
    While that isn't what I was suggesting, why not?
  • getmore4less
    getmore4less Posts: 46,882 Forumite
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    edited 19 April 2017 at 7:14PM
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    Kynthia wrote: »
    People are still missing the fact there must have been a common intention at some point that the non-owning partner would obtain a share if the property. Without that there is no beneficial interest even if the partner pays half the mortgage directly to the lender for years.

    Much of the opinions expressed on this site regarding beneficial interest are scare stories without much accuracy. Everyone commenting should really read this link that explains it properly.
    short link

    You need to read the implied trust wording more carefully.

    It says the opposite to what you are claiming.

    if contributions are made the owner would need the proof they were gifts or similar.

    edit : quote the relevant text
    A court can infer a common intention if financial contributions were made but nothing was said between you and your partner.

    The sole legal owner may argue that the contributions were made on a different basis, for example, as a loan or a gift, but they would need evidence of this.
  • Poor_Single_lady
    Poor_Single_lady Posts: 1,527 Forumite
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    Sorry if I am "overdramatising" it's just quite an important subject to get clued up on. I had no idea about this so grateful for people explaining and pointing out how it would work.
    To be fair to me if I was being blas! about my parents money and not worrying about what could go wrong then this would be much worse than being worried or dramatic.
    I will bear this in mind for the future. Thank you to everyone explaining.
    2017- 5 credit cards plus loan
    Overdraft And 1 credit card paid off.

    2018 plans - reduce debt
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