I WILL get there!!

Bobarella · 7 April 2016 at 6:07PM

Wow to his friend staying for 2 years. I do hope he figures out that's just not realistic.

Awww that's lovely of you to look after the baby. Her parents having a weekend away?

crazy_cat_lady · 7 April 2016 at 10:07PM

Love a good list.

DH has no clue why I always buy notebooks whenever I'm out

kirtsypoos · 8 April 2016 at 9:10AM

I really hope so Bob!
It's a friends birthday and he has decided his celebration will be to go on a ghost hunt in Liverpool which god daughters mom wanted to go to, and after the spendy few weeks we've just had, OH and I decided we just can't afford it so offered to have M while they are away there (very complicated situation with her Dad, involving her moms best friend so he's not really part of the scenario at the moment)

I think I drive everyone mad with my lists ccl, but I love to have everything written down! Did another couple whilst OH was out at martial arts class last night to try and get organised for the upcoming Morroco trip! Luckily, my company gets sent LOADS of free notebooks etc by companies so I tend to do ok on that front - some are really lovely, leatherbound ones!

OHs parents called last night, we have decided not to let on to them what has been going on - partly because they are so far away and would probably just worry, and partly because I don't want them thinking they did the wrong thing in lending us the house deposit.

crazy_cat_lady · 8 April 2016 at 9:13AM

I always try and keep my mam out of whatever is going on between me and dh. She's my mother and there's no way that she's not going to take my side and I don't want her ending up hating dh because we've had an argument. I think it's better that his parents don't know personally.

kirtsypoos · 8 April 2016 at 9:19AM

That's very true. I think if it doesn't work I'd want both his parents and mine to have more of an idea - although not full disclosure - partly because he needs to take responsibility for his actions, and partly because I am in no way willing for him to blame me for a break up which has come about because of his actions.

I haven't mentioned anything to my parents, it's been difficult as I'm so close to my Mom and my Dad seems to have a sixth sense when it comes to me being upset so he's been in touch a lot over the past few days. I'm trying to avoid speaking to them too much to be honest as they will know from my voice that I'm struggling.

I'm feeling much more positive about everything at the moment, but there are still moments where I can't help but think about what I read and then I get very upset.

crazy_cat_lady · 8 April 2016 at 9:44AM

You're allowed to be upset though - don't beat yourself up about that. It sounds crass but sometimes you can't do anything other than give things time.
Absolutely though, if things don't work then people need to know why.

Bobarella · 8 April 2016 at 9:21PM

Every couple has the right to their privacy and you are right not to share too much at this stage. Wise words from Cat as always.

kirtsypoos · 12 April 2016 at 8:02AM

Hello all,

I've been a bit absent from my diary for a few reasons...

1. Still struggling to get my head around everything at the moment. We are doing LOTS of talking, and seem to be on the same page with everything. OH has stuck to all the rules I set so far. We aren't doing so well with the aims we set ourselves which we think will improve our time together, like no phones or laptop use after a specific time, specific bedtimes etc.

2. I had my goddaughter over the weekend, and while she is an absolute joy and such an easy baby, I underestimated the amount of work required. Saturday was fine, she was beautifully behaved and charmed people everywhere we went, but Sunday was a different story - she was teething really badly and didn't want to be put down. She was happy and smiley as long as I was holding her, but if I tried to do anything else she screamed. OH held her for the first time (first time he has ever held a baby) and she screamed and screamed, which I think has put him off forever!

3. We are trying to do the garden, which has resulted in me being shattered and achey, with lots of small cuts everywhere - including on my head! We have a bush I wanted to get rid of, so started trying to cut it but it is what OH refers to as a barbery bush - apparently they are common in New Zealand as the boundaries to farms to stop trespassers - well I can see why - I'm covered in puncture wounds and have a forehead like a colander! So lots of falling asleep on the sofa.

4. We go on holiday in just over 2 weeks so I'm trying to plan what we still need to get. Booked the airport parking last night - 25% cashback from tcb, still £105 though :cool: budgeted, but I hate spending that amount on nothing! We didn't go for the cheapest as our flight is very early in the morning and I'm not enamoured with the thought of parking in a car park 30 minutes away from the airport at 2am, it was only £20 cheaper but will save us over an hour of faffing in total.

Anyway, hope everyone is well, and the debt busting is continuing!

Bobarella · 12 April 2016 at 3:31PM

My daughter is as you describe some times. It is hard to get stuff done then. You do just get used to it when it's your own child so hope your OH isn't too put off.

That bush sounds a bit deadly too!

kirtsypoos · 12 April 2016 at 6:18PM

All credit to you Bob, I felt like I could sleep for a week, except my house was a bigger tip than it's ever been as I couldn't even get to load the dishwasher and there were brightly coloured, noisy, flashy toys everywhere! But I loved every single minute of it

I still have a colander-like forehead but I'm hoping to get some of the garden waste in the firepit over the next few days so the garden will look like someone actually cares about it!

I WILL get there!!

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