Concerns About Friends Behaviour

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  • pearl123
    pearl123 Posts: 2,049
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    Bath_cube wrote: »
    I'm sorry if this post might sound offensive on here but I do require some advice asap. My OH goes out on Fridays by himself (which is fine by me no problem). He doesnt go to meet anyone specifically he just chats to most people he knows in a local public house. Since last summer a man has sort of latched on to my OH and is showing some strange behaviour. He has told my OH he is bisexual but prefers men and that he thinks my OH is hiding his true feelings towards him this was before Christmas. This man seems peculiar he lives round the corner from this public house but insisted on getting in a taxi home with my OH and watched my OH going into our house. When my OH told him no I'm not interested in you sexually he appeared very upset and my OH told him it was best he didn't contact or see him again given his feelings. Since this happened my OH has gone somewhere different and last Saturday we went out together as normal in a quiet nice bar. This man came in and stared right at me then went to the bar and stormed up to my OH. He asked my OH why was he ignoring him and asked out loud if it was because of me. When I went over to see what was wrong this man got really annoyed and was fuming under his breath. I told him to go and he stormed off. He rang my OH the following evening and told him not to ignore him. I was coming home from work yesterday and he approache'd me as I was getting my keys out of my bag. He told me he had had sex with my OH and he isnt happy with you. I told him to go or I will call the police and he put his face next to mine. When my OH got home I asked him about this and he said it's all lies and this bloke has become obsessed with him. He phoned him in front of me and told him not to bother either of us. What can I do if he approaches me again or follows us into the bar we go to?. It looks like he wants to stir it out of jealousy.
    Husband goes out alone and meets up with someone. He shares a taxi and give out phone number.
    To me it sounds like something has been going on.

    He's jealous for a reason and I'm not entirely convinced its mental health.
  • thorsoak
    thorsoak Posts: 7,166
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    I have a great idea! Call your cousin, give him this man's telephone no and tell him that he wants a friend!
  • LilElvis
    LilElvis Posts: 5,835
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    cjdavies wrote: »
    I have no advice as unsure, but makes it easier to read for others.

    Doesn't make it any more believable though :rotfl:
  • LilElvis
    LilElvis Posts: 5,835
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    thorsoak wrote: »
    I have a great idea! Call your cousin, give him this man's telephone no and tell him that he wants a friend!

    Or he could take over from the poor lady from the pub who was conned into giving bedbaths to the uncle of bluelass.
  • Money_maker
    Money_maker Posts: 5,471
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    How does he 'insist' on getting a taxi home with your OH? Could your OH not have said no and enforced it? Are things good in the rumpy pumpy department cos this doesn't sound right.
    Please do not quote spam as this enables it to 'live on' once the spam post is removed. ;)

    If you quote me, don't forget the capital 'M'

    Declutterers of the world - unite! :rotfl::rotfl:
  • It's great you're so positive he hasn't cheated, don't think anyone else would be in these circumstances.
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,579
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    Bath_cube wrote: »
    There is no question of my OH being gay or unfaithful with any man or woman.

    You wouldn't be the first person to say this - and be wrong.
  • phillw
    phillw Posts: 5,593
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    Bath_cube wrote: »
    I told him to go or I will call the police and he put his face next to mine.

    You should go to the police and tell them the truth, that he approached you and you felt threatened by him.

    What they would normally then do is send someone to talk to him and let him know that you had called the police because you felt threatened and that it is in his best interests to not contact you as he would then be committing an offence.

    As for whether he's telling the truth or not, everyone lies at some point in there life. Either to get something or to get out of something. What is important is you get back to feeling normal and move on.
  • Another vote for going to the Police. Aggression, ability to see boundaries and doesn't take no for an answer. He sounds unstable.

    Log it with the police now.
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,579
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    I'm confused as to how this person got your OH's number?
    Precisely!
    Bath_cube wrote: »
    Quite a few of my OH friends or colleagues have his number.

    But this man is not a friend of your OH (if what you have posted is true and despite the title of your thread).
    He's some random that your OH chatted to in a pub.
    Are you really saying that your OH gives his phone number out to people willy-nilly?

    And....he insisted that he shared a taxi with your OH?
    Really?
    Is your OH incapable of saying 'no'?
    There's no way I (or my OH) would let anyone share a taxi to our house when they live round the corner from the pub.
    lika_86 wrote: »
    How did/does he have your OH's number?

    There are two options - either he has boundary and perhaps mental health issues or he's telling the full or partial truth.

    Unless there's a legitimate reason why he has your OH's phone number I'd be inclined towards believing the latter. Most men (and women) I know wouldn't give their number to someone they know casually without a reason.

    Precisely.
    I'd be looking closer to home for the reason for this 'friend's' odd behaviour.
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