KonMari 2016 - The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up

Picklepot · 6 July 2017 at 11:44AM

Hi all

Just interested to know if MK has a positive effect on mental health? I have a lot of big unpleasant things going on in my life at the moment.Nothing that will resolve any time soon.
I have always found taking control of a situation helps me keep my stress down but unfortunately the bad stuff is largely out of my control.
I know once i start rootling around in cupboards and drawers loft and garage it will uncover a massive amount to go, but it will also cause sadness making decisions and parting with stuff.
Just interested to know what others think? I suppose what i am asking is, is it theraputic?
pic

Siebrie · 6 July 2017 at 12:25PM

Picklepot wrote: »

Just interested to know if MK has a positive effect on mental health? I have a lot of big unpleasant things going on in my life at the moment.Nothing that will resolve any time soon.
I have always found taking control of a situation helps me keep my stress down but unfortunately the bad stuff is largely out of my control.
I know once i start rootling around in cupboards and drawers loft and garage it will uncover a massive amount to go, but it will also cause sadness making decisions and parting with stuff.
Just interested to know what others think? I suppose what i am asking is, is it theraputic?
pic

Yes, it is, very. I think just knowing that those decisions are out there waiting for you, hiding in the attic and the garage, causes a lot of stress. Once you have made those decisions, and have decided to only keep what makes you happy/comfortable (or what is necessary to make you happy - like screwdrivers to put up cheerful shelves

) 'life' becomes easier. Your head does not need to cope with anxiously awaiting what will come next, and can focus on the main issues (which you may not like - clutter has a way of hiding important issues).

Picklepot · 6 July 2017 at 12:48PM

Thank you Siebrie you couldnt be more right!
There are some things i know its completely ridiculous to keep. I know why and what the emotion behind it is but this time i need to have the courage to just let them go.

Karmacat · 6 July 2017 at 1:07PM

Its definitely therapeutic, picklepot, but I'd definitely recommend starting with easy stuff at first, even for a few days. The stuff you're calling ridiculous to keep - do *you* understand why you've done so (not asking you to share, unless you want to). And how is that different from "the courage to let it go"? It sounds like a very big deal.

Picklepot · 6 July 2017 at 1:23PM

Thanks Karmacat

No honestly, even i can see its ridiculous. Am under a huge amount of pressure at moment so generally beating myself up about everything.
I have 'congratulation on birth of baby' cards in my garage.(He s an adult now for goodness sake) We had a flood a long time ago i was going to photograph them as they got wet, i tried to dry them but they were badly damaged. i need to chuck them.
The emotion behind them was that when my DS2 was born 2 big life events happened when he was 9 days old, we had to manage a horrible situation but thankfully he was a wonderful baby and we got through but when i see the cards i feel bad that we didn't spend that new baby special time with him that we did with DS1 and do the baby books and momentos. i couldn't even preserve his cards.

I have decided to discuss it with him. I know he will laugh and tell me he loves me and to let them go.

See its ridiculous isnt it?

Karmacat · 6 July 2017 at 1:52PM

Oh sweetie! It's new baby hormones, that's for sure.
He loves you, and he knows you love him.

silvasava · 6 July 2017 at 3:32PM

Picklepot - I do understand where you are coming from as due to circumstances I was unable to spend as much time as I wanted being a Mum to my two boys (who are also grown men now) However, it took me a long time to realise that the loss was entirely mine - not theirs. They had everything they needed including love so felt no deprivation. It was me that was deprived. There's no way I can do anything about it Sh*t happens but I have two sons that I love dearly and I know love me. Weep a little weep & let it go Picklepot.
Huge Hugs
xx

PollyWollyDoodle · 6 July 2017 at 5:00PM

I think that the end result is definitely beneficial. Lots of people have talked of feeling lighter when they get rid of stuff, and my life is definitely less stressful just because I'm not wading through piles of paperwork to find one item or having to move several things to reach something stored at the back of the cupboard.

However the process can arouse some painful memories and it forces us to confront the results of our past actions. If you're feeling particularly fragile, and we all get days like that, then don't push yourself too hard.

GreyQueen · 6 July 2017 at 7:12PM

I think one of the tricks is not to allow oneself to be derailed by a big ole bugbear of an item. If you can't face making a decision about a particular item, put it aside. Maybe for a few months, or weeks or even years.

It's truly amazing to me that some things which were too emotional to release can lose some of their potency over time and become a bit meh, whatever when you revist them.

Been busy IRL with work, gardening and several excellent (library) books. I flitted into the library after work last week and had a glance at the For Sale books. Frustratingly, one of the titles was one which wasn't kept at that branch and which I had only just paid to have sent to mine, read and returned days earlier. Wasn't this particular copy as a different format but I had this inner convo:

Wah! There it is, and only a little more to buy it than to have it reserved. Wah, wah! If only I'd known, I could have waited and bought it and OWNED it. Wah! Woe! etc etc etc.

Then I gave myself a stern talking-to. I'd read it and returned it already (book 4 of a series of 9, have my nose in book 5 right now) and I don't need to own a copy. If I had bought it, I would have donated it by now, so there was no mileage in whingeing inwardly about not knowing it was going to be sold. Funny how there's an inner Aqusitiveness Monster in even a big, grown up wumman like wot I am.

lillibet dripping, I'm finding the weight slipping off so easily with a paleo/ gluten-free diet. Lots of salads soused with lovely olive oil, seeds and nuts, veggies and modest amounts of meat and fish. I'm hoping to really impress the hospital clinic when I attend for my annual appointment in the autumn. They professed themselves very pleased with 11 kg/ 6 months which they saw last time.

Karmakat, grinning about the idea of a local history society being interested in that old card. Can see why they might be if my ancestor was a person of note but he was just a regular working man, why would anyone want it?!

MMF007 · 6 July 2017 at 8:54PM

Picklepot, yes! I am finding the process very therapeutic. I am taking control -
organising items into suitable places, easy to find and use;
releasing items that make me cross, eg clothes that don't sit well, things that are 'neither use nor ornament', broken stuff, annoying things that don't serve their intended function, things that hold bad memories and other surplus Stuff that has clogged up my cupboards and my life!;

All MK efforts reduce stress!

I think it was GQ who said, ages ago, that we can get rid of the things that sit niggling at us and therefore have a much calmer environment.

So I say don't keep the broken stuff and the stuff of bad memories, set them free!!
Don't keep the surplus that does not spark joy, enjoy the new-found space instead!
Look at the things that *do * spark joy and feel that joy!!!

Hope this helps and if you could use one, please take this encouraging hug (((0)))

M

ETA - thanks to all Kondo-istas. I took my elderly neighbour down the local high street today so she could shop in 3 CS's. OK, so it was 27°C and I was pushing her wheelchair some considerable distance (!) but she bought 3 tops and a pair of sandals and said she had such fun treating herself. Well done all those who have released clothing. Worthy causes make some money and buyers get to 'recycle' the bargain items.

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KonMari 2016 - The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up

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