Birthday celebrations - paying for own meal

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  • NeilCr
    NeilCr Posts: 4,430
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    Pollycat wrote: »
    It really sounds amazing. :rotfl:

    I'm with the OP on the menu choices.
    Especially about the sweet potato fries.

    Always worth trying something as opposed to judging from afar.

    I’m with both of you on the sweet potato fries. :D:D
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,578
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    NeilCr wrote: »
    Always worth trying something as opposed to judging from afar.

    I’m with both of you on the sweet potato fries. :D:D
    I'm happy to try something different.
    But macaroni cheese, chicken and mushroom pasta, gammon steak or a burger?
    Really? 2 pasta dishes?

    I can probably cook better myself at home. ;)
  • NeilCr
    NeilCr Posts: 4,430
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    Pollycat wrote: »
    I'm happy to try something different.
    But macaroni cheese, chicken and mushroom pasta, gammon steak or a burger?
    Really? 2 pasta dishes?

    I can probably cook better myself at home. ;)

    Agree it’s not very inspiring on paper. I suspect it’s a safe menu to try and cover as many bases as possible.

    On the other hand I was out to lunch today and had a seriously lush burger, Always worth seeng what the food is actually like. For £40 I’d be hoping for something pretty decent.
  • peachyprice
    peachyprice Posts: 22,346
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    IMO, if she's chosen the menu and booked private space to host her birthday meal she should be footing the bill. It's pretty bad form to organise an event, invite people, then expect them to pay for themselves.

    If she wanted to go for a meal where you all paid for your own food and drinks she should have booked a normal table where at least you could get to choose how much you were spending.
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  • Loz01
    Loz01 Posts: 1,841
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    That menu sounds horrendous and I wouldn't be going if it was me :D not at £40 a pop plus drinks and taxi/travel home. Watching the Bake Off wearing PJ's sounds a better night.
  • Unsure if it's a Northern thing, but whenever I've gone out for a friend's birthday we always pay for our own food...

    HBS x
    I'm in Bristol and grew up in London and we pay for our own food as well, so I don't think it's a northern thing.
    Proud member of the wokerati, though I don't eat tofu.Home is where my books are.Solar PV 5.2kWp system, SE facing, >1% shading, installed March 2019.Mortgage free July 2023
  • borkid
    borkid Posts: 2,475
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    NeilCr wrote: »
    Agree it’s not very inspiring on paper. I suspect it’s a safe menu to try and cover as many bases as possible.

    On the other hand I was out to lunch today and had a seriously lush burger, Always worth seeng what the food is actually like. For £40 I’d be hoping for something pretty decent.

    If that was offered to me I would only be able to eat the gammon and if by any chance I happened to be veggie as well there would be nothing I could eat. I'm not that unusual either and usually have a choice of several things to eat when I go out.
  • NeilCr
    NeilCr Posts: 4,430
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    edited 4 October 2017 at 7:52AM
    borkid wrote: »
    If that was offered to me I would only be able to eat the gammon and if by any chance I happened to be veggie as well there would be nothing I could eat. I'm not that unusual either and usually have a choice of several things to eat when I go out.


    Yes I know.

    I’ve seen a few of these types of menu for functions with only four or five things on. They usually avoid anything that may be spicy (curry, chilli etc) and tend to blandness. I must admit I’m surprised there is no fish option

    Me and herself sometimes end up with only one option but that’s fine. It’s not the main reason for us being there. I haven’t been at any where someone couldn’t find anything they’d eat which is, I guess, my point about covering as many bases as possible
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,578
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    borkid wrote: »
    If that was offered to me I would only be able to eat the gammon and if by any chance I happened to be veggie as well there would be nothing I could eat. I'm not that unusual either and usually have a choice of several things to eat when I go out.
    I agree.
    I don't think 2 pasta dishes out of 4 choices 'covers as many bases as possible'.

    Unless they do gluten free pasta, it would rule out people with wheat intolerance.
    And possibly people with dairy intolerance - both pasta choices sound like creamy sauces rather than tomato based.
  • Izadora
    Izadora Posts: 2,047
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    Pollycat wrote: »
    I'm all for helping a friend enjoy themselves.

    But not when it involves an over-priced meal with a crappy menu and a 'you can contribute to this or that gift' stipulation.

    The gift stipulation would annoy me but, as there are options on there for you to give a token donation, it could be a lot worse. I think I see the overpriced meal and one night of bad food as part of my present to them so I don't begrudge it.

    IMO, if she's chosen the menu and booked private space to host her birthday meal she should be footing the bill. It's pretty bad form to organise an event, invite people, then expect them to pay for themselves

    I really don't see why she should have to pay for her friends to celebrate her birthday with her. People know in advance what the cost is and it's an invitation not a summons, they can choose not to go if they really don't want to.
    If she wanted to go for a meal where you all paid for your own food and drinks she should have booked a normal table where at least you could get to choose how much you were spending.

    I do agree that it would be better not to have a set menu but quite a few restaurants won't give you that option if the booking is for a large group of people. She might also have thought that it would be easier for people if they knew in advance exactly what they had to budget for - it's all well and good saying you get to choose how much you're spending but then you've got the whole pay for what you had/split the bill debate, which has been done to death in previous threads already.
    NeilCr wrote: »
    I haven’t been at any where someone couldn’t find anything they’d eat which is, I guess, my point about covering as many bases as possible

    I'm vegetarian and have ended up in rib shacks and steak restaurants but have always managed to find something to eat - admittedly there was one occasion where I had to make up a dinner out of side dishes but it was actually quite nice.
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