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Results: Has being in debt caused you stress and anxiety?

Yes

96.66% • 434 votes

No

3.34% • 15 votes

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449 votes in total.

  • FIRST POST
    • MSE Andrea
    • By MSE Andrea 8th May 15, 11:26 AM
    • 8,874Posts
    • 21,273Thanks
    MSE Andrea
    Debt and Mental Health - How have your debts affected you?
    • #1
    • 8th May 15, 11:26 AM
    Debt and Mental Health - How have your debts affected you? 8th May 15 at 11:26 AM
    Hi everyone,

    As part of Mental Health Awareness Week 2015 next week (11-17 May), we’re supporting Stepchange Debt Charity and the Mental Health Foundation (MHF) in highlighting how debt can play a large part in mental health issues.

    We have a free Mental Health and Debt guide available for anyone to download so if you're struggling please do take a look!

    Has being in debt caused you stress and anxiety?

    We're launching a poll to see how many of you have had mental health issues. We've kept responses private so other forum users won't see who's voted in the poll. If you'd like to reply below and discuss that would be great but don't feel you have to.

    Join the forum to vote in the poll and join the conversation: join.

    Mental Health Awareness Week Twitter Chat Wed 13 May, 11am

    We're hosting a twitter chat with StepChange Debt Charity and the Mental Health Foundation this Wednesday: Twitter Chat
    Last edited by MSE Andrea; 08-05-2015 at 12:08 PM.
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Page 6
    • charmed1318
    • By charmed1318 18th Aug 17, 1:19 PM
    • 185 Posts
    • 30,483 Thanks
    charmed1318
    I feel for all these sorties, I I guess in a way I have been lucky.
    I am 29 now.
    Diagnosed at 16 with depression.
    Diagnosed a 25 with cyclothymia.
    Been in debt (it seems like forever)
    I have never doubted any of the money I owe, but have been paying £1-£5 a month to them. They will get paid it will just take time.

    I am also very lucky I can now talk to my mum, though she doesn't know the amount.
    I do think there needs to be stringent which to be applied to some, if not all lending. Although due the DPA, unless we say something , it will not help.

    I think the main problem can start at about 19-21, that was when I got a £2000 loan and a credit card. Yet my lil brother who is 25, hasn't had core.any kind of credit = no credit score.

    Anyway, long story short there should be more accessible help.


    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 3rd Sep 17, 12:38 PM
    • 2,831 Posts
    • 16,368 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Ive been in debt since I was offered my first credit card when I was 18. I didn't understand that it was a debt card and not a credit card. I gave in to the overwhelming temptation to buy some of the things I'd always wanted. I had no idea of how hard it would be to pay it all back once interest had been added.

    When I left college I was offered a graduate overdraft, which I foolishly accepted. When I still hadn't managed to get a job after 6 months I began to get pressure to pay it back, even though I was on unemployment benefit. I managed to find a job eventually, but never earnt enough to get free of the debts. It was always a worry at the back of my mind but I coped and had an excellent credit reputation. As a result I kept getting offered more credit.

    When the recession hit in 2008 I struggled to make my monthly repayments and pay my living expenses. I become very stressed and depressed. At one point my OH and I were paying £1000 a month in interest alone! We were were working like slaves but never had anything to show for it. I was prescribed anti depressants by my doctor and told that he had seen many people recently due to money worries .

    I am 53 now and soon to become debt free . The relief is overwhelming and only now do I realise what a black cloud my OH and I been living under for so many years. I never want another credit card or loan ever again. I intend to save up and pay for things the old fashioned way. Credit is a trap that I and many others have fallen into and it's very hard to get free when the whole system seems designed to keep you in debt. I wish that when I was 19 I had known what I know now .
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £818/Emergency Fund 2 = £110.76/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • beebrook
    • By beebrook 14th Sep 17, 1:49 PM
    • 40 Posts
    • 49 Thanks
    beebrook
    From my experience, debt and mental health are intrinsically linked. They feed each-other.

    Being depressed and having anxiety disorders like I've had can make it difficult; to budget, to hold-back from overspending, and stop yourself from doing impulsive things (like taking out payday loans).

    Being 19 and in so much debt (more specifically, bad, unmanageable debt) has only made these mental health problems worse. They'd make anyone stressed, worried, and perhaps even depressed. I know first-hand that facing up to a debt problem can shatter your self esteem too. It's like facing up to your own flaws as a person.

    In other words, poor mental health can put you in debt, and debt can cause mental health problems.

    My advice to anyone else with debt and/or mental health issues is this: read through the DFW forum.

    You'll then realise that you're not alone. There's a way out (one way or another) and being in debt isn't a reflection on you as a person. It just means you're in a bad situation. Even if you're partly to blame, sub-prime loans, high interest credit cards and consolidation loans really shouldn't exist in the first place.
    Debt to date: £4731.75 - 97.2% left to go
    Debt upon joining (Sep'2017): £4,870 - Loans, Credit Cards & Nationwide Overdraft
    • mudgekin
    • By mudgekin 9th Oct 17, 12:37 AM
    • 495 Posts
    • 2,845 Thanks
    mudgekin
    Hi

    Iím not in debt yet but Iíve been battling a severe depression and anxiety now for about 6 years.
    When I start to feel my anxiety rising Iíve been buying, then I regret it then I feel worse. Iíve got a house full of craft stuff and the strange thing is that my ďstuffĒ can settle me down sometimes.

    I really donít know what way to turn really. Iíve recently had a course of counseling with a psychologist who was dealing with a stuck bereavement issue and unfortunately thatís all she was dealing with. Iíve seen a psychiatrist, a dreadful man whoís dismissive manner towards me made me feel worse about myself. Heíd happily talk to DH but barely spoke to me and when he did he was so condescending.

    I canít sell my stuff Iíve crafted as Iím just not good enough. When you have to complete with the Etsy talent or on eBay the cheap Chinese stuff making money from crafting is just not the way to go. Iím also physically disabled now so I can do stuff on days I feel physically or mentally ok.

    Iím just really worried that my spending is going to quickly tear through what savings we have left. I think in 3 tears Iíve spent the best part of 20k and Iím so ashamed. Iíve spent all the lump sum I got from my pensions from being medically retired from word.

    Quite honestly. I despise myself.
    Iíve no idea why Iíve even posted but mental health definitely affects spending. When I wS well I was frugal and careful and was able to save a nice nest egg but thatís gone now. I really am scared I go through the bit thatís left which will be needed if we manage to get a social house.
    • beebrook
    • By beebrook 9th Oct 17, 4:46 PM
    • 40 Posts
    • 49 Thanks
    beebrook
    Hi

    Iím not in debt yet but Iíve been battling a severe depression and anxiety now for about 6 years.
    When I start to feel my anxiety rising Iíve been buying, then I regret it then I feel worse. Iíve got a house full of craft stuff and the strange thing is that my ďstuffĒ can settle me down sometimes.

    I really donít know what way to turn really. Iíve recently had a course of counseling with a psychologist who was dealing with a stuck bereavement issue and unfortunately thatís all she was dealing with. Iíve seen a psychiatrist, a dreadful man whoís dismissive manner towards me made me feel worse about myself. Heíd happily talk to DH but barely spoke to me and when he did he was so condescending.

    I canít sell my stuff Iíve crafted as Iím just not good enough. When you have to complete with the Etsy talent or on eBay the cheap Chinese stuff making money from crafting is just not the way to go. Iím also physically disabled now so I can do stuff on days I feel physically or mentally ok.

    Iím just really worried that my spending is going to quickly tear through what savings we have left. I think in 3 tears Iíve spent the best part of 20k and Iím so ashamed. Iíve spent all the lump sum I got from my pensions from being medically retired from word.

    Quite honestly. I despise myself.
    Iíve no idea why Iíve even posted but mental health definitely affects spending. When I wS well I was frugal and careful and was able to save a nice nest egg but thatís gone now. I really am scared I go through the bit thatís left which will be needed if we manage to get a social house.
    Originally posted by mudgekin
    We all have our different personal struggles. There are lots of different ways of dealing with those but I can suggest reaching out to others going through similar experiences. That's what helped me the most.

    Why is all this relevant to the MSE DFW board? Well, the take-away message is that mental health and overspending feed eachother - and it's one of the most vicious circles out there.
    Debt to date: £4731.75 - 97.2% left to go
    Debt upon joining (Sep'2017): £4,870 - Loans, Credit Cards & Nationwide Overdraft
    • sirius60
    • By sirius60 18th Oct 17, 8:16 AM
    • 14 Posts
    • 12 Thanks
    sirius60
    Supporting family member
    I'm not struggleing with debt because of mental health issues but I am trying to support a family member who is.
    She has had mental health issues for a number of years, and throughout that time must have got bits of credit, paid it for a while then fell behind when things got difficult.
    For the last couple of years she has received demanding letters from Lowells and numerous other companies but was never taken to court. However recently several of them have taken her to court and court has made an order that she has to pay £50 on a debt for £500 and £40 on a debt for £300. She can hardly afford to live on the money she has, every week I am lending her money for gas or electric, kids bus passes or shopping.
    She has no idea what these debts are in relation to, she throws letters away because she can't cope with the stress but from the odd time I've managed to see them before they get binned, it looks like some are for very similar amounts of money but from different debt companies. When I try to encourage her to do something she gets more stressed and then will avoid me!
    I recently introduced the idea of step change which she took on board but as soon as I took over the budget sheet for her to fill in she fobbed me off and now gets annoyed it I try to talk about it.
    I know that if we don't sort this out the next thing will be baliffs at the door and I am scared of the impact of that on her mental health. There are other issues as well as the debt and if it was just her to worry about it would be difficult enough but there are children too.
    I am just completely stuck I can't just get on and do it without her I need her to get involved but the thought of it just sends her spiralling down .
    • phillw
    • By phillw 9th Nov 17, 9:06 PM
    • 1,095 Posts
    • 646 Thanks
    phillw
    Credit is a trap that I and many others have fallen into and it's very hard to get free when the whole system seems designed to keep you in debt. I wish that when I was 19 I had known what I know now .
    Originally posted by HairyHandofDartmoor
    I certainly think there should be lessons on the national curriculum about eating, drinking & spending responsibly. With an exam & league tables (which maybe also take into account ex pupils health and wealth).

    It is really hard to be successful without borrowing money at some point these days.

    I am just completely stuck I can't just get on and do it without her I need her to get involved but the thought of it just sends her spiralling down .
    Originally posted by sirius60
    The next time she seems to be amenable to dealing with it, don't try to get it done as quickly as possible before she changes her mind because it will just instantly overwhelm her. Instead talk to her about how she feels about the debt, talk about what it means to her etc. Don't point out that if she doesn't deal with it that it will become a huge problem (even though we all know it will).

    Sometimes by caring, you become part of the problem. If she feels supported by you then eventually she might be able to deal with it.

    When I start to feel my anxiety rising Iíve been buying, then I regret it then I feel worse. Iíve got a house full of craft stuff and the strange thing is that my ďstuffĒ can settle me down sometimes.
    Originally posted by mudgekin
    This isn't strange, this is quite normal (as far as normal goes). It's just not healthy. Like the cakes/biscuits/sweets that makes you feel good but give you diabetes. You need to find healthy ways to settle yourself down.

    I really donít know what way to turn really. Iíve recently had a course of counseling with a psychologist who was dealing with a stuck bereavement issue and unfortunately thatís all she was dealing with. Iíve seen a psychiatrist, a dreadful man whoís dismissive manner towards me made me feel worse about myself. Heíd happily talk to DH but barely spoke to me and when he did he was so condescending.
    Originally posted by mudgekin
    Have you tried a 12 step programme? There are probably others but a google search came up with http://debtorsanonymous.org.uk/, sometimes talking to other people who have the same issues can really help. Talking to professionals who have a degree and whose only experience is on the other side of the table doesn't always help.

    Even if you don't believe in god (all 12 step programmes seem to be about handing your will over to the god of your understanding) then spending time with and talking to people going through the same thing as you can help.

    I canít sell my stuff Iíve crafted as Iím just not good enough. When you have to complete with the Etsy talent or on eBay the cheap Chinese stuff making money from crafting is just not the way to go. Iím also physically disabled now so I can do stuff on days I feel physically or mentally ok.
    Originally posted by mudgekin
    When you're not feeling good then it's easy to pin your hopes on a dream, having the clarity of mind that you're not good enough is a positive. Some people will patronise you and say you should just keep your hopes up, I'd just say keep doing the craft stuff if it makes you happy but don't worry if it's no good and you can't sell it. A lot of successful artists have doubts about their abilities, as do a lot of unsuccessful artists.

    Maybe write a blog about your journey and show off what you've made, maybe you can make money from that if you get enough visitors or maybe that will be something you do and moved on from because you didn't get what you needed from it.

    If you have a large amount of craft materials, then you could just sell those at a local craft fair or maybe start a community craft group & advertise it with charities like mind as they are always looking for groups to refer people to.

    The important thing is to not overload yourself and also do not think that something will miraculously save you, so don't try to spend a lot of money to achieve something because your judgement is skewed.

    Iím just really worried that my spending is going to quickly tear through what savings we have left. I think in 3 tears Iíve spent the best part of 20k and Iím so ashamed. Iíve spent all the lump sum I got from my pensions from being medically retired from word.

    Quite honestly. I despise myself.
    Originally posted by mudgekin
    Forgive yourself, you're entitled to make mistakes. You absolutely have to do that, but then try to learn from your mistakes. You can't change the past so don't dwell on it, but if you want to change how you deal with things in the future then it's certainly possible.

    Iíve no idea why Iíve even posted but mental health definitely affects spending. When I wS well I was frugal and careful and was able to save a nice nest egg but thatís gone now. I really am scared I go through the bit thatís left which will be needed if we manage to get a social house.
    Originally posted by mudgekin
    Admitting you have a problem is the first step towards getting better. Put some boundaries in place, like you won't buy anything when you don't feel well, then it will stop shame spirals from dragging you down further. 12 step programmes are a good way of keeping you honest, but talking to family is also good.

    I've had my own issues and am storing boxes of things that I need to somehow recover money from, so I do understand. It does get easier.
    Last edited by phillw; 09-11-2017 at 9:56 PM.
    • AlwaysOnTheGo
    • By AlwaysOnTheGo 21st Nov 17, 2:38 PM
    • 33 Posts
    • 19 Thanks
    AlwaysOnTheGo
    Climbing Out
    Last year a little money came my way, just enough to pay off a credit card have some essential repair work carried out on the house and decorate a few rooms myself. No splurges on clothes, cars or holidays. I noticed once the money hit my account I felt lighter than I have in years. Debt and the stress caused by the constant struggling to make ends meet really has ruined aspects of my life and taken a toll on my face over the years.
    AlwaysOnTheGo ~ Debt Free Wannabe no 537 Motto: Just Keep Swimming
    The Whitgift Foundation £9,856 CCJ for 2 terms School Fees after fee payers suicide - and they call themselves an Educational Charity!
    Repayment Mortgage £163k New Debt £10k
    Fighting to get my son back to the UK.
    • Stanley_Ipkiss
    • By Stanley_Ipkiss 23rd Nov 17, 2:06 AM
    • 3 Posts
    • 1 Thanks
    Stanley_Ipkiss
    Hi, I’m knew to the forum so go easy please.

    Basically I have been diagnosed by my doctor that I am suffering from depression. I have been prescribed tablets that are slowly helping.

    Anyway, that main point to this post is basically when I feel at my lowest, I always end up getting payday loans, or unsecured loans. The only thing I can put it down to, and I realise now that it’s daft, is that me having money made me happy, therefore forgetting about my depression.

    Then when it comes to paying these loans back, bang, I’m back feeling lower than a snakes belly.

    Basically I was hoping if there has been anyone else in the same situation and how did you get out of it?

    Many thanks

    Stanley Ipkiss
    • nicwhit87
    • By nicwhit87 27th Nov 17, 4:14 AM
    • 2 Posts
    • 1 Thanks
    nicwhit87
    The amount of debt I am in has left me suicidal, to the point where my job is now at risk.

    I have nothing left to keep me here, no one will help me, all they are offering me is a debt management plan which will make things worse for me in the long run.

    The most frustrating thing is, all I'd need would be a loan with good interest to consolidate the debt and I'd be free within 48 months or so and I can afford the repayments.

    Friends are checking on me every day, but if things don't change in the next few weeks I just won't here anymore. I've already been to mental health professionals, GPs, Counsellors and so on, nothing is helping and no one is offering a resolution.

    My debt situation is only due to having a really tough 8 years where at least once a year I've had to pay large amounts of money out for funerals, broken down cars that costed a fortune to fix but couldn't afford to get a new one. I couldn't bury my mother, no one offered help as I am an only child and even the cheapest funeral costs around £4000.
    • anfieldred
    • By anfieldred 4th Dec 17, 1:57 PM
    • 119 Posts
    • 2,586 Thanks
    anfieldred
    The 2 are definitely linked; yet it's not really acknowledged with the links of Mind etc.: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/depression/causes/ (not saying because it's not on there that it's not mentioned anywhere - I work in this industry and there's very little out there that ties the two together)

    Ask anyone in debt are they happy, and they might put on a brave face but deep down they're broken. I've had the same issue for years - I've had to change jobs just to keep my head above water paying off debts, and as each one as been paid off and I've had a bit more money every month there's been a considerable improvement in my mood, so much so that others are noticing it too.

    I wish there was more help/support out there especially from the high street banks.
    • MMC87
    • By MMC87 4th Dec 17, 2:43 PM
    • 54 Posts
    • 71 Thanks
    MMC87
    This is such an interesting thread. I feel as though Iím on the verge of mental and physical collapse. Sky high anxiety one minute, the feeling of being punched in the gut constantly....A few weeks ago, I spent a whole day just throwing up. This debt has completely ravaged me.
    • Moonshine14
    • By Moonshine14 17th Dec 17, 6:41 PM
    • 33 Posts
    • 22 Thanks
    Moonshine14
    I believe itís both ways..stress/depression/anxiety can lead you to overspend and equally overspending can increase depression/anxiety/stress etc. Good luck to anyone going through this.
    • CallyJen
    • By CallyJen 28th Dec 17, 5:16 PM
    • 6 Posts
    • 10 Thanks
    CallyJen
    Hi All.

    Iím new here and I think I have been stuck in the debt/depression rut for the last 12 years. I have seriously contemplated suicide as a way out at times. I have done the obsessive overspending to make myself feel better-coming home with bags of tat that I donít need. Iíve taken out payday loan on top of payday loan just to make things better for a little while.

    Anyway, my partner is threatening to leave me. His dad is dying so he has enough on his plate without my issues (his words) but instead of making me reach for another payday loan, I have finally taken the plunge to try and sort things out. I have been sick with anxiety trying to talk to lenders but Iím hoping I see this through and properly sort a solution.

    Debt is about so much more than money. Itís wrapped up in a complex psychology of spending habits, self reward and hatred, uncontrollable behaviour and possibly addiction. Also a sense of fatalism and futility- iíll never get out of the debt so why not add to it?

    I donít even know why I have had this ďlightbulb momentĒ! I want to take control back and although difficult and downright painful, I think this is the way forward for me.

    All the best to everyone else posting on this thread, if we didnít want to find a solution I donít think weíd be here.
    • Keedie
    • By Keedie 3rd Jan 18, 10:17 PM
    • 240 Posts
    • 1,000 Thanks
    Keedie
    Hi CallyJen,

    I'm sorry to hear about your troubles, I have been on the financial rollercoaster due to my mental health as well. I recently discovered Christians Against Poverty (CAP), and they help with life skills, debt management plans and budgeting etc. You don't need to be a christian to go there (as I am not), but they will still help.

    You might find them useful... https://capuk.org

    And I hope that your boyfriend's not suffering too much with his father's terminal situation,
    xx
    LBM 27/06/16 = £31,400.57 (7 creditors) BUT on 03/01/2018 = £15,969.52/£31,400.57 (6 creditors) = 50.86% repaid
    Aiming to be Debt Free = 31/12/2020
    • The_Analyst
    • By The_Analyst 9th Jan 18, 11:28 AM
    • 28 Posts
    • 24 Thanks
    The_Analyst
    Arriving late to this thread, but thought I'd share my experiences. Back in 2007, we moved house and took on a mortgage that was too big for us - 2 lenders turned us down, but an IFA "worked his magic" and lo and behold we got the dream house we wanted. 3 months after moving in, my fiance gave birth to our first child and before we knew it, SSP had kicked in and we were effectively living on one wage in a house we couldn't afford.

    We trundled along for the next few years, living on credit, extending loans and overdrafts, and somehow always landing on our feet (temporarily) when things got to close for comfort - unexpected share payouts, compensation for a car crash, mortgage rate drop - stuff like that always seemed to pull us out of the fire

    Fast forward to 2010 and child no.2 comes along and by the time SSP kicks in, we are living off one credit card (the rest are maxed out) with a credit limit of £8,000

    2 or 3 months in and the credit company get in touch to say they are lowering the limit as they have concerns about our spending (£1k a month, paying only min amount)

    By the time my wife goes back to work, we are in trouble - disposable income of about £200 a month to run a household with 2 kids. Somehow we struggle through to summer 2011 when wife unexpectedly falls pregnant with child no.3. This sends me in to a panic - no more avenues of credit, all of our income taken up with minimum payments and no available credit. The prospect of more maternity leave fills me with dread and affects my working and personal life. Wife loses the baby through an ectopic pregnancy - more stress, more unhappiness. Lack of sleep, emotionally closed off to my loved ones and angry. Angry at everything and everyone - an anger that nearly cost me my marriage.

    So, I took control of things and entered a DMP - the instant relieving of the pressure was amazing. I dread to think what would have happened if I hadn't been honest enough to face our problems head on.

    12 months from now we will be debt-free. Discussions about money are a different beast these days - planning for the future and making plans for savings plans etc
    July 2011 - Total Debts £47,359.19
    July 2013 - Total Debts £36,092.19
    July 2015 - Total Debts £28,068.19

    Jan 2018 - Total Debts £10,415.89
    Jan 2019 - Total Debts £0
    • Mark321123
    • By Mark321123 9th Jan 18, 8:39 PM
    • 6 Posts
    • 1 Thanks
    Mark321123
    As a child I was sexually abused for many years by a group of people including family members , for many years as a child I went mute due to the shock, as the years went on I always self harmed myself thinking I’m worthless, and have many habits like not asking friends back to my home , or I always bolted my bedroom door etc , years later I got married and had one child , started to get help regarding my self harming . I was doing Ok not brilliantly when one day I got a letter from the Solicitors saying I have been left a large sum of money , it was left by a family member that abused me all those years ago , at first I refused the money , but my exwife convinced me to take the money and pay off a few loans we had .like I fool I did basically it was blood money , all my memories come flooding back and within months self harming and depression come back , the money I basically gived it all away to strangers , my wife at the time just couldn’t unstandard why I was doing this and had taken it personally, with a year I lost my marriage , home, work. That was 12 years ago I was thinking of taking out a Iva recently , but last October I was diagnosed with pituitary tumour the tumour is small at the Moment when it gets a certain size I will have it removed , unfortunately when I do it removed they will operate through my skull , because of the type of operation I’m having I have to hand my drivers license back to the DVLA for five years , my job involves driving so I be out of work in the near future , so I can’t take out a Iva . Now my depression started to return , it just never stops
    Last edited by Mark321123; 09-01-2018 at 8:50 PM.
    • FOX
    • By FOX 12th Jan 18, 8:18 PM
    • 3 Posts
    • 1 Thanks
    FOX
    I think it's despicable that so many individuals suffer from mental health issues due to debt related issues, that are the product of our capitalist society. What I've learned along the way is that the system is at fault, designed to lure us in and along with the original lack of information available to the general public in relation to credit and debt management - thankfully, that's improved - spit us out worse off. Originally, like most people debt affected my mental health greatly. But once I became conscious of how the system worked I realised that it was up to me to control it. I noted how many business people got into debt for billions and shrugged it off, as they were educated to view it as a natural part of business and usually started up again unscathed. So I decided I was no longer going to worry about it so much that it affected my mental and physical health, and instead decided to manage it. There's no doubt that it was difficult, and I had to change my thinking and spending habits, but it is achievable.
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 15th Jan 18, 11:13 PM
    • 9 Posts
    • 6 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    Iíve been bouncing my debt around for a few years now and I suppose I have had a background worry about it but I just buried my head in the sand and kept plodding on,itsonly in the last few months that Iíve suddenly realised what a mess Iíve gotten myself into and now itís affecting me big time,I was diagnosed with mild depression 14 years ago after also being diagnosed with a chronic pain condition (Iím not sure which came first) and have been on antidepressants ever since,I came off them about 5 months ago because I was fed up with the way they made me feel and they didnít seem to be helping much,I felt better as soon as the withdrawal symptoms wore off but now that my debt problems have come to a head I am losing the plot,I canít sleep and canít concentrate every time even the smallest thing goes wrong I just burst into tears,Iíve even contemplated suicide this week and that is something I have never ever thought about,I scared myself today and Iím hoping once I get my debt under control I will start to feel better, sitting here writing this has calmed me down and writing that I thought however briefly about suicide has shocked me,now Iím calm I donít think Iím at risk of hurting myself but earlier today it went through my mind,Iím angry now as well at myself for not reining in my spending and at the credit card companies that make it so easy to get into this mess in the first place
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