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  • FIRST POST
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 8th Mar 13, 8:30 AM
    • 4,749Posts
    • 28,291Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Looking for the silver lining
    • #1
    • 8th Mar 13, 8:30 AM
    Looking for the silver lining 8th Mar 13 at 8:30 AM
    Well I'm back! After clearing my debt in 2010 and staying debt free for a couple of years I'm now back to square one. Mainly due to OH's work being so erratic (he is a sub contractor in the building trade). He has weeks at a time with no work and when he does get work the pays not great - but anything is better than nothing. My wages cover the bills and food thankfully but nothing else.

    Anyway a combination of OH not bringing much in and not budgeting properly has led to me building up credit card debt again (thankfully at 0%) of £5368.95

    I have realised that the only way to stay on top of things is to stick to a budget. What we were doing before is spending the money before we had it on a credit card and then clearing it at the end of the month. But OH can be at work one day and laid off the next so we didn't always have the money to cover what we'd spent and this is where we have been going wrong and how the debt has built up again by me having to transfer it to a 0% card.

    What's happening now is I'm trying to stay on top of things by having a "pot" of money in my monthly budget and sticking to that. Once I have cracked this then it should be easy to stay out of debt when it's paid off.

    At the end of the month whatever OH has earned is split as follows:

    50% is for petrol, OH's work expenses/mobile phone, and anything else we need that month

    25% is for holidays (I know we shouldn't be having holidays whilst in debt but they keep us smiling through the uncertainty)

    25% is for paying off the debt and when this is paid off this will become savings.

    So far I've stuck to this for two months. It's hard at times but this is the only way to do it. Should OH not bring anything in one month then I'm afraid we'll have to dip into what little savings we have in our emergency fund. BUT NO MORE ADDING TO THE DEBT!!!

    Currently the debt is split between two cards:

    Barclaycard £1800 0% until September 2013 -so this must be paid off first

    Halifax £3568.95 0% until 2015 - so a bit more breathing space on this one but still want it paid off asap.

    I'm doing the grocery challenge and the virtual sealed pot and doing well with this. The VSP will pay for Christmas.

    Decided to do a new diary as it helped so much last time - so here I go again on my second debt-free journey. Determined this will be the last time.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
Page 2
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 2nd Apr 13, 6:00 PM
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    Buffythedebtslayer
    Just checking in Sun, hope you and OH are doing ok and you got to the doctors.

    Big hugs

    xxx
    Saving all the money.............really I am !
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 3rd Apr 13, 12:26 AM
    • 4,749 Posts
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    Sun Addict
    Hi All

    Buffy and CR - thank you for your kind thoughts

    Just got back from hospital. They have kept him in overnight and taken blood tests. Possibly brain scan tomorrow. Doctor thinks it might be thyroid - so fingers crossed. He seemed a lot better today and no episodes. Weird having the bed to myself for the first time since I had the kids (although dog and cat currently on it!).


    DD DS people from work and OH's brother and sister have been very supportive so I don't feel on my own anymore. Didn't want to worry his brother and sister until we knew more but DD rang them as she was so worried.


    Going to try and get some sleep - would kill for a very large glass of red!! Hopefully there will be some positive news tomorrow. It just shows you never know what's round the corner.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • merlot123
    • By merlot123 3rd Apr 13, 1:11 AM
    • 678 Posts
    • 1,862 Thanks
    merlot123
    Thinking of you and your husband.

    merlot123
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 3rd Apr 13, 1:22 AM
    • 14,919 Posts
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    Buffythedebtslayer
    Hello Sun xxx

    Am glad OH is in hospital, at least if some thing happens again they can look after him etc. Also VERY pleased the family are a round.

    Hope you are sleeping well with the cat and dog for company.

    In my thoughts Lovely xxxxxx
    Saving all the money.............really I am !
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 3rd Apr 13, 8:40 AM
    • 5,631 Posts
    • 18,537 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Fingers crossed for good news today Sun addict xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £6936.45 - 04/09/17 - 70.99% paid off
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 3rd Apr 13, 9:55 AM
    • 4,749 Posts
    • 28,291 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Looks like good news!
    OH has had his blood tests back and they are clear so looks like brain scan not necessary. Doctor has told him to take 2 weeks off work and see GP about stress and depression. Can you believe this could cause symptoms so bad! Sounds like he will be discharged today. I am so relieved! Fingers crossed.

    Thanks everyone for your support.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 3rd Apr 13, 10:27 AM
    • 14,919 Posts
    • 48,105 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    OH has had his blood tests back and they are clear so looks like brain scan not necessary. Doctor has told him to take 2 weeks off work and see GP about stress and depression. Can you believe this could cause symptoms so bad! Sounds like he will be discharged today. I am so relieved! Fingers crossed.

    Thanks everyone for your support.
    Originally posted by Sun Addict
    wow, I had no idea stress and depression could do that.

    Also have fingers crossed for him coming home today. woah.

    what a relief! big hugs xxx

    xxx
    Saving all the money.............really I am !
    • Claree__x
    • By Claree__x 3rd Apr 13, 11:11 AM
    • 1,179 Posts
    • 2,747 Thanks
    Claree__x
    Scary few days but I'm glad no brain scan needed! x
    • christopher_robin
    • By christopher_robin 3rd Apr 13, 2:00 PM
    • 23 Posts
    • 66 Thanks
    christopher_robin
    Great news Sun.

    It's time like this that puts everything else into perspective.

    Hope your OH gets the help he needs from your GP when he gets discharged.
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 3rd Apr 13, 4:02 PM
    • 4,749 Posts
    • 28,291 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Thanks all

    Got him back home but he's not right. He is strange - like a mentally ill person maybe this is normal I don't know? He was looking at newspaper and staring at the same page running one finger down it. GP is shocked at diagnosis as he is adamant there is something happening in his brain. Hospital say he must rest or he'll be back - hope they know what they're doing! Maybe this is what they used to call mental breakdown?
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 3rd Apr 13, 6:59 PM
    • 14,919 Posts
    • 48,105 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    Oh Sun, that does sound worrying. did the GP say there was anything you should watch for?

    Is anyone else staying with you guys?

    It certainly does put stuff into perspective.

    Again, thinking of you xxxx
    Saving all the money.............really I am !
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 3rd Apr 13, 9:14 PM
    • 4,749 Posts
    • 28,291 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Hi buffy

    DD is here but she is like chocolate fire guard as she is panicking so much. OH has just had another "do"- eyes went weird and he started dribbling. He wanted to go to toilet so took him but he collapsed in hallway although still conscious. Just made it to loo in time but made a it of mess. However earlier in day I left him for just 20 minutes while I went to shop for a few bits when I got back it was like all hell had broke loose - he had messed everywhere. Rang doctor who is coming out tomorrow. Is this stress/depression - I don't think so! He is comfortable in bed now and I am having a much needed very large glass of red to help me sleep as I am so wrecked!
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • Jaspersmum
    • By Jaspersmum 3rd Apr 13, 10:05 PM
    • 85 Posts
    • 137 Thanks
    Jaspersmum
    Just wanted to say my Uncle a few years ago had symptoms very similar and would just pass out. They ran every test in the book and came back with nothing. The Doctors also put it down to stress/anxiety/depression!

    Really hope you get to the bottom of things soon.
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 3rd Apr 13, 10:17 PM
    • 4,749 Posts
    • 28,291 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Thanks for that jaspersmum - to cap it all DD has just announced she's pregnant!!!!! Daren't tell OH as that would really stress him! What a year so far. - DS split up with live in gf last month too. Need to win lottery to make up for it!
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 4th Apr 13, 10:46 AM
    • 4,749 Posts
    • 28,291 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Doctor has been - OH needs to see neurologist urgently. Symptoms can be caused by stress but he needs to make sure nothing else. Dr is referring him today. I mentioned tumour but Dr thinks some of the signs aren't there.

    Holiday tickets arrived today and I could have cried. Can't imagine OH will be well enough in 3 weeks. Although he went downhill in less than 2 weeks so you never know. Will wait another week yet before cancelling. He is adamant he's still going.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 4th Apr 13, 11:01 AM
    • 5,631 Posts
    • 18,537 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Oh SA, I do hope DH is ok. Hope the referral comes through quickly.

    Congratulations on DD's news!!! xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £6936.45 - 04/09/17 - 70.99% paid off
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 4th Apr 13, 11:20 AM
    • 14,919 Posts
    • 48,105 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    Oh my darling. how bloody scary.

    and Jesus. does DD have a partner? Is he any use? Congratulations btw xxx

    and 3 weeks to holiday. ugh.

    Although I guess none of matters really, good that the doc said about not signs of a tumour.

    Is there any history of epliespy in the family? (think I have spelt it wrong)

    Has DH been working excessively hard? I guess it could be some kind of collapse because of exhaustion?

    You are in my thoughts SA.

    cannot believe hospital sent him home. Doc must have been furious.

    take care hon - hope you are eating/drinking etc. must look after yourself as well as DH ok?

    xxx
    Saving all the money.............really I am !
    • amber03
    • By amber03 4th Apr 13, 12:32 PM
    • 798 Posts
    • 4,729 Thanks
    amber03
    Just found your diary and concerned for you and your family. It is bad enough trying to get out of debt without the worry of health and other family problems. Sometimes its like one problem starts and then others start snowballing from there, with you in the middle of it.

    Like you i had got out of debt but stupidly found myself back in it, hopefully by the end of next year i should be debtfree again, and hopefully will stay that way.

    Congratulations on becoming a nan,i'm due to become a nan around september, came as a surprise as it was an accident but am looking on the positive side and not too worried about the future as the baby will be well cared for.

    Lets hope that OH soon as a diagnosis for what is wrong with him, seems unbelievable that stress and depression can make someone behave like he has done. You know your OH better than anyone else so the doctors should listen to you as you know when he is ill.

    With all that is happening around you remember to look after yourself you dont want to be the next casualty and lets hope that by time your hols come around everything has quietened down and you can relax and enjoy your hols, as you deserve it.

    Big Hugs.x
    Debtfree and and staying that way.
    £1000 Emergency fund No.112 £310
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 5th Apr 13, 9:24 AM
    • 4,749 Posts
    • 28,291 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Thanks everyone for yor support

    Well OH is in neuro ward. He had loads of tests yesterday and is to have brain scan today. Dr at hospital was very thorough and said they will check for everything possible and the make sure he comes out with medication. He couldn't see any signs of brain swelling and he has passed all the neuro tests for obvious things so this sounds good. They still think it's most likely to be severe depression or stress. I'm hoping it's a nasty virus that has affected his brain and will clear up with antibiotics. Buffy -DD has epilepsy but controlled and yes OH has been complaining about feeling totally exhausted and burnt out.


    Not so sure how I feel about being a nan - still think I'm too young!! DS was unplanned so history is repeating itself. Not met her bf - she can be very secretive she has known him 8 months and he's older than her, has job and own place so looks like we will finally get her off our hands! Hallelujah!


    Not going to worry about debt as now realise what is more important. I will chip away at it bit by bit and it wouldn't be the end of the world if it has to get pushed onto another 0% card if need be. But the majority of it is on the Halifax card which is 2 year's 0% so can relax a bit about this portion. The Barclaycard 0% ends at end of August. It would be nice to pay it off by then but I always have the option of balance transferring it. Not worth stressing about as long as minimum payments can be met with the odd extra payment now and again.


    OH doesn't get paid when he's off but will try and see if he's eligible for some sort of sick benefit. Never dabbled in the world of benefits before. He keeps going on about not bringing any money in but I've told him not to worry. I earn enough to pay bills and buy food and we have a bit of money saved which could tide us over for a while. Will be on MSE 24-7 looking for tips!!


    Will keep you all updated and I really appreciate all the kind thoughts.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 5th Apr 13, 10:41 AM
    • 14,919 Posts
    • 48,105 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    am really pleased OH is in hospital and getting looked after by the docs etc.

    Phew!

    and seems like a good plan on the debts, not important at the moment.

    big hugs SA

    xxxxxxxxxx
    Saving all the money.............really I am !
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