Should I ask my flatmate to subsidise more of the rent?

Former_MSE_Nick · 7 May 2015 at 12:47PM

I'm looking for a new flat with a friend of mine, but he earns quite a lot more than I do so he has a greater budget. We've found somewhere we both like, but even if he takes the bigger room and pays a bit more I still can't really afford it. Should I ask him to subsidise a larger share of the rent? I'd feel bad asking but he really likes the place and we do want to live together.

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dawyldthing · 12 May 2015 at 9:06PM

At the end of the day it's a roof over your head. I will never get the keeping up with the jones to have a big place just to show off. When I was a student I found the cheapest place possible as it's just somewhere to sleep and the rest of the money can be better used elsewhere. I did the same when buying a house as its a roof over our head, somewhere to call home.

It takes long enough to earn money, why waste it?

G_M · 12 May 2015 at 9:17PM

MSE_Nick wrote: »

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Tigsteroonie · 12 May 2015 at 9:19PM

If the flatmate "really likes the place" then be honest with him/her and say that you cannot afford it. If they then offer to subsidise the rent, that's their choice.

Bossypants · 12 May 2015 at 9:25PM

dawyldthing wrote: »

At the end of the day it's a roof over your head. I will never get the keeping up with the jones to have a big place just to show off. When I was a student I found the cheapest place possible as it's just somewhere to sleep and the rest of the money can be better used elsewhere. I did the same when buying a house as its a roof over our head, somewhere to call home.

It takes long enough to earn money, why waste it?

That depends on your personality type. If you're a homebody and/or an introvert who needs their personal space, it can absolutely be worth spending a little bit more to get something that feels comfortable. That doesn't necessarily mean the biggest place, or even the nicest, but the key is to figure out the things that really make a home for you and pay for them, not other nice features you don't really need.

In terms of the OP's question, I'd approach this directly with your prospective flatmate. Tell him, without fluffing about, that you want to live with him and you like the flat, but it's just more than you are able to spend right now. That leaves the ball in his court to choose whether he wants to subsidise you, find another flat, or find another flatmate.

Mickygg · 12 May 2015 at 9:47PM

Well my tip would be work out the budget you can afford and then look. You shouldn't have gone to see it if you couldn't afford it.
Just because someone earns more they shouldn't have to pay a higher rent.

Rambosmum · 12 May 2015 at 9:54PM

I agree with tigsteroone. You can't afford it. Tell your mate that and see what he says. Before you next go looking at a place ensure you both know the lower earners budget.

silvercar · 12 May 2015 at 10:01PM

There are apps designed to ascertain a fair rental split, based on how individual sharers value different factors in the allocated rooms.

My son recommends:

http://www.spliddit.org/apps/rent

I'm sure there are others.

Pixie5740 · 12 May 2015 at 10:18PM

No, you shouldn't ask and I'm shocked (well not that shocked since this is a hypothetical MSE scenario) you would expect your friend to pay more rent than you. Where would it end? Would your friend be expected to put more towards the utilities? Would you be the flamate that never buys toilet roll and eats other people's food?

I've had one way relationships with friends before, just take take take, and so I moved on, without those friendships. If I had £1 for every time I heard,"but you've got a good job." Well I do but because I set my ambitions higher than hoping to be a WAG.

Rosemary7391 · 12 May 2015 at 10:35PM

Pixie5740 wrote: »

No, you shouldn't ask and I'm shocked (well not that shocked since this is a hypothetical MSE scenario) you would expect your friend to pay more rent than you. Where would it end? Would your friend be expected to put more towards the utilities? Would you be the flamate that never buys toilet roll and eats other people's food?

I've had one way relationships with friends before, just take take take, and so I moved on, without those friendships. If I had £1 for every time I heard,"but you've got a good job." Well I do but because I set my ambitions higher than hoping to be a WAG.

If I particularly wanted to live with someone and also wanted something they couldn't afford I'd pay more. It really depends on the people involved and their priorities! In this case, both people should discuss their budgets and needs/wants before viewing - what someone is prepared/able to pay will change depending on the property, location vs travel to work costs is the one that jumps to mind but I'm sure there are more!

Pixie5740 · 12 May 2015 at 10:45PM

Telling your friend that you can't afford to live somewhere and then allowing them to decide whether or not they want to subsidise you is different to asking and expecting your friend to pay more just because the earn more money than you.

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Should I ask my flatmate to subsidise more of the rent?

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