Cash as a wedding gift - any advice??

cattie · 21 May 2006 at 8:02PM

I would never give cash as a wedding gift & think it's a bit on the vulgar side for people to ask for it.

A gift voucher is more acceptable.

The original idea of wedding gifts was to enable the couple to get items to make a home together. Now most couples live together & already have had a home for sometime, sometimes even two homes. This to me negates the need for anything other than a token gift.

VickyA_2 · 21 May 2006 at 8:06PM

I've never been to an evening reception where they've asked for presents. Nor will I be sending our gift list to people attending our evening do.

Am I abnormal/know the wrong people?

Rachie_B · 21 May 2006 at 9:33PM

for just an evening do id only give £10- £15
id only give more if i was a guest all day

i hate the "asking for cash " thing too

Rachel85 · 22 May 2006 at 10:23AM

How about getting them cash for wherever they're going on honeymoon? Put it in a little envelope and suggest they buy something to remember their holiday.

A few years ago my manager from work got married and although she didn't ask for money, we ended up giving her this (much to my disapproval). We pooled all the money together and changed it into dollars for them to spend on their honeymoon.

The bonus is that they probably won't work out how much you've put in as it'll be in a different currency, and also most currencies offer more of their currency to the pound (ie. you get more euros, dollars, etc for your quid!)

Alternatively is their a home furnishing shop that they particularly like? If so could you buy them a voucher from there and suggest they spend it when they come to furnish/decorate their loft conversion? Somehow, whilst a £10 voucher is the same as a £10 note the voucher looks like you've made more effort!

BTW: Debenhams now do a little box to put gift cards in. Its free if you put £50 on the gift card, £1 if not.

melancholly · 22 May 2006 at 10:41AM

i guess in some cultures money is the norm.... like chinese weddings.... seeing how much some people spend on weddings and the price change from a standard-anything to a wedding-anything, i can understand cash if they're using it to pay for some of the reception.

or alternatively, just write a cheque so then they know it's from you, and it can't be spent without at least spending some time in their bank account first! as far as value goes, i couldn't afford anything more than £20/£25 anyway!!

pdoff · 22 May 2006 at 1:08PM

when we got married we sent a list for day guests - items began at £2 as there were some students invited! didn't send one for evening guests as did not expect presents from them. we said similar items were fine as long as they let us know so we didn't end up with 5 toasters, then if they found them cheaper elsewhere it was ok. the problem with buying something not asked for is it is a waste if never used - we have boxes with glass bowls & wine glasses in from our wedding which have never been & probably never will be used as they are just not us. seems a shame that someone went to the time & effort of choosing something that wasn't used.
the problem i have with cash is they know just what u have spent! i too buy things in advance when on offer, knowing that people are getting married or whatever - my friends were given a set of cutlery & a set of crockery that i got reduced (nothing wrong with them) - if i hadn't got them the present would have looked rubbish as i had not much cash at the time.
i like the idea of buying bits for the conversion.
do u know them well enough to confide your feelings & see if there is anything they can think of that they would like? or maybe mention u have seen a lovely vase or whatever & wondered would they like that instead.
good luck!

Lucie_2 · 22 May 2006 at 2:58PM

rainee wrote:

our wedding present list is for a loft conversion but we have a list of supplies we need and for every bit bought it will be photoed and and sent with a thank you note.
the room is for us no one else except my daughter will have her own room with own door and not having to go through her brothers!
my friend asked if she needed to gift wrap the plaster board!!

This is a great idea. I would much rather buy someone a few floorboards than give them the money!
My Parents have been invited to a wedding without a list, but with a request for contributions towards the honeymoon (African Safari). I told my Mum to buy them a pair of binoculars & a bottle of insect repellent!
My friend Sam works on the theory that you should pay for your food with your wedding gift, so if you're invited to the day you would spend more than if you were only going to the night do.

ribenagirl · 22 May 2006 at 3:47PM

Thanks very much all of you - more decisive now that I am NOT in fact going to give cash!

I like the B&Q voucher idea, we could perhaps specify that it is for a tin of paint for their loft conversion or couple of rolls of wallpaper or something (at least that way I'd feel like I was getting them SOMETHING...) and the bottle of champers idea to christen it with so think we will do one of those

purplepurple · 22 May 2006 at 5:31PM

Friends of ours bought us a houseplant (can't remember the name of it, but it's got lots of branches!) and taped 30 pound coins to ribbon and hung them all over the tree/plant (bit like christmas tree decorations)...
it looked fantastic - they said it was a money tree - and we've still got it 7 years on to remind us of them (we used the money obviously!):D

Tribal · 22 May 2006 at 5:34PM

As with others, asking for money sets my teeth on edge. Recently the same thing happened, with the obligatory "we've been together for so long (usually about 5 years) and we have everything" whine. (Even Prince Charles accepted gifts, and I believe he probably does have everything he needs...)This was a successful couple, pulling in A Lot of the ready. We chose to give them Harrods' cut crystal wine glasses and shot glasses. The thank you note was eye-openingly sad in that they said they had never been given anything from Harrods, and were so grateful. Made you sad they hadn't put a teeny bit more thought into the origninal request. The money they received went to finance the honeymoon as they said it would, in some far flung exotically expensive sun-soaked spot, but essentially they will have nothing tangible to remind them over the years of peoples' thoughtfullness in the gifts given them.

Cash as a wedding gift - any advice??

Comments

Categories

Get our FREE Weekly email full of deals & guides - and it’s spam-free