depression

[tankgirl1]

Hi there - before I start- I am NOT looking for medical advice, just other peoples experiences of suffering with depression.

I was diagnosed with depression in about 2000, and have been on a variety of anti-depressants. I'm currently in the process of changing from Paroxetine to Venlefaxine.

However, I struggle enormously with day to day life, and have done for years. I can never wake up in the morning, and had major problems with this when I was working, despite having 7- yes SEVEN alarm clocks! I just wouldn't hear them. I find it difficult to get motivated to do anything, and over the last few years, have found it extraordinarily hard to apply myself, or to concentrate on things. Before the baby came along, I would lock myself away for days on end, and just sleep.

Has anyone else had similar experiences?

[Danni]

Been suffering from depression since 2000 (I was 13), got diagnosed 2002 (15/16). Had a brief period of no depression while pregnant. Started the medication merry-go-round with paroxetine (Prozac) in 2004 with the diagnosis of post-natal depression. Was hospitalised (voluntary) Jan/Feb 2005 where I was prescribed venlafaxine (which is joint top of my list of worst antidepressants side effects wise). Since then tried a lot of different antidepressants- none have worked yet. Along with venlafaxine, the worst antidepressant I've had is lofepramine (since I'd pretty much exhaused the SSRI list that was the most recent one to be prescribed). Am having to stop that one as it's affecting my vision (along with other side effects such as nausea, vomiting, dizziness, increased anxiety, increased suicidal thoughts, sensitivity to the sun) and I have a college course to complete.

I cannot work, have struggled with my college course, cannot look after my daughter or myself, and need someone to look after me pretty much all day and night. My partner is my main carer and I have a friend in college who looks after me there. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't be able to get out of bed at all.

ETA: I hope things get better for you soon. Don't let my experience put you off- venlafaxine is a great drug for a lot of people- it just doesn't suit me.

[iwanttosave]

However, I struggle enormously with day to day life, and have done for years. I can never wake up in the morning, and had major problems with this when I was working, despite having 7- yes SEVEN alarm clocks! I just wouldn't hear them. I find it difficult to get motivated to do anything, and over the last few years, have found it extraordinarily hard to apply myself, or to concentrate on things. Before the baby came along, I would lock myself away for days on end, and just sleep.

Has anyone else had similar experiences?

i am exactly the same, I just cant seem to wake up at all. A bomb can go off and I wont wake up. It doesnt help being called lazy either but I dont think not being able to get to sleep till 4am doesnt help :rolleyes:

I had a touch of PND up until about jan or feb this year and still get touches of it now, but have never been to the docs about it.

I find it really hard to get motivated as well, I can have a run of 3-4 days where I am running about doing alsorts and then I just have no energy and can hardly get myself off the sofa.

[razorbladekisses]

I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression last year. I was prescribed Prozac which didn't help at all and then prescribed Escitalopram 20 mg (Cipralex/Lexapro) and have been on that ever since. I also attend regular appointments at the hospital with a social worker/psych.

I'm always tired and if I had my way I would just sleep.

I can't seem to get myself out of this depressive state. Does it eventually go away or what... :confused:

[Miroslav]

Suffered (?) with depression for about 14 years.

Over the years, my partner has passed away, my daughter has passed away, as has my Mother, so the 3 most influential people basically.

Had 1 relationship since my partner passed, which did not work out, and don't make friends. I have a flatmate, we got on but argue alot.

I struggle with motivation/energy/sleep etc, and if I knew how to overcome this, then I would let you all know ;)

I'm seriously considering jacking in my psychotherapy. It's not working, I don't say much, and get criticised for not saying much, which doesn't help.

Don't think things will ever change but will fight on.

Anxiety has risen over the years.........can spend days indoors without going out, bills get forgotten, telephone/door never gets answered.

I don't do medication, I don't want anything that can affect my mind.

[Fritha]

I was diagnosed with depression in January after years and years of suffering. I just hid under my duvet and cried all the time. The doctor put me on Citalopram and although the side effects were horrendous (I got through them by halving my dose for a couple of weeks on the doctors advice) they did wear off and I haven't had any for a good few months now.

I'm in St Helens and the most useful they they did for me was depression management. It helped me to deal with my symptoms. How to relax, what to do when I felt low, generally how to cope with all the symptoms. I'd highly recommend anyone suffering to force themselves to go back to the doctors and ask for the same thing.

I know what you mean tank girl tho, sometimes I have more energy than an entire football time, other times it's an effort to open my eyes! I've found if I get up and immediately start doing stuff the momentum carries me through the day. I also found that if I set myself tasks for the day and if I do them I can reward myself with not doing anything else if I don't want to!

I also remember what it was like when I first got diagnosed so if I've managed to get up and get myself washed and dressed without a fuss then I count that a good day now!

Hope you all feel better soon

[L D N]

I come from a family who suffer from depression. An uncle commited suicide, mum and sister both suffered in the past and Dad has clinical depression (a symtom chemo left him with). Congratulations on wanting to fight it - whether you feel like that or not, the fact you have posted on here means you do.

I have recently been put on daizapam for a muscle spasm problem. The worrying thing is that in spite of it's being an anti-depressant, I don't feel any more lively or happier than before. Scared of how I will feel when I stop taking it.

Small wins are good for the soul with depression i.e. getting out for a walk, having a tidy up, successfully eating properly in a day.

Depression is hard to live with, both for the sufferer and those around them. It's tempting to sleep your way through it, I know it's something I have done.

Do we expect too much, just by wanting to be happy?

[kaya]

Two years ago i found out i had a degenerative spinal disease, im 37 and the mri results were similar to those of 70-80 year olds, i used to own/run a racecar, train in martial arts and have an active physical job of which i was on the top rung of the ladder, so bang went 35k and the company car along with any future employment hopes, my back is permanently painfull and often locks into position without warning.I was given a range of opiate based painkillers and told they could not operate.I promptly became addicted to the opiates(difficult not to) and still have not sorted out any state benefits, obviously all this sent me into a spiral of depression, not even answering the phone unless i knew it was my wife for the last 2 years. Through my own initiative and determination i have gone from 400mg tramadol, 4000mg of paracetamol and some rather nasty muscle relaxants to only 1000mg paracetamol and some natural herbal dietry suppliments, im getting stronger every day at the moment and life doesnt look to bad. I cant help thinking somehow that the meidcation made things worse, in fact for me they definatly did. I would never advise anybody to stop there medication without consulting a professional first but urge anybody suffering from depression to start researching there ilness thoughroughly, get interested in how and why you feel like you do, the internet is an excellent research tool and the medical profession have a very poor understanding of your condition as depression has so many different faces, i believe depression is a direct result of the lifestyles we lead or are forced to lead, with poor diet being the main culprits. Im planning on starting a degree in nutrition this year and the more i research the more interested i become, its about non refined healthy foods but more importantly about balance, your body needs the right chemicals produced to make you feel good, you need the right diet to produce the chemicals but because your depressed you dont/cant have a proper diet. Its a big vicious circle and a hard one to break, but there is light at the end of the tunnel-its just that you have to be the one to go find the light, the opiates just made everything cloudy for me, i think id rather stick wasps up my bum than be a victim of all that pharmaceutical crap again, 1.1 million people in the uk addicted to prescription painkillers/antidepressants is a figure i find very scary indeed, most of them probarbly arent ill with the reason that they were prescribed the drugs for but now suffer from the side effects of there use and the drugs they are also prescribed to combat the side effects of the origional drug. The pharma companies make money from each and every one of us all throughout most of our lives from nappy creams to toothpaste so do you think its in there interests for us all to get healthy? It didnt used to be like this many years ago. And the only people who can change it is us, but we have to take an interest first

[bluezone]

Depression is all through the family so it was no surprise when I was diagnosed with it. I was given anti-depressants on and off during my teens in the hope it was a temp thing, then my dad collapsed 3 days before my wedding in 2003 when I was 23 and I just cracked up or so it seemed. I was put on Citalopram 20mg one a day but after a while this had no effect so from then to now and with marriage breaking up etc I am now on 3 a day and have regular check ups at the doctors. WIth their supervisionn I did try to lower the dosage down to 1 a day again but within a month I was a nightmare to live and work with so I am back up to 3 a day.

In my family, my mum, dad, and 1sister are all on "happy pills" the other sister takes St.Johns wart. My nan is also on 'happy pills'.

I also feel it is hard to get up in the morning and on the way home from work (only a 30 min journey) I tend to have to pull over to stop me falling asleep and have a 5 min power nap! Ever found your self crying and you dont know why - exactly ;)

You feel like you want ot do more at times and at others you just want to shut the world off and be on your on and sleep cos you never feel like you have had a good nights sleep!! I am improving slightly by getting approx 5 hours a night now instead of 2/3 hours.

Some people just thiink depression is all inthe head and that all you have to do is to pull yourself together which can be frustrating cos unless you have suffered it yourself you cant sympathize.

Sorry if I went on a bit xx

[micheleen]

I come from a family who suffer from depression. An uncle commited suicide, mum and sister both suffered in the past and Dad has clinical depression (a symtom chemo left him with). Congratulations on wanting to fight it - whether you feel like that or not, the fact you have posted on here means you do.

I have recently been put on daizapam for a muscle spasm problem. The worrying thing is that in spite of it's being an anti-depressant, I don't feel any more lively or happier than before. Scared of how I will feel when I stop taking it.

Small wins are good for the soul with depression i.e. getting out for a walk, having a tidy up, successfully eating properly in a day.

Depression is hard to live with, both for the sufferer and those around them. It's tempting to sleep your way through it, I know it's something I have done.

Do we expect too much, just by wanting to be happy?

I'm not surprised you don't feel livelier on diazepam, it's a tranquilliser not an anti-depressant :o , one of the benzodiazepine family. Common name Valium

[kaya]

i think the trick for me was to not see depression as an illness but as a symptom of another problem which it very often is, western medicene never treats the problem, only the symptoms. Why treat a persons depression when you can give them pill to make them feel happy and go away, you never get to why your actually feeling depressed this way, its a vicious circle and its so much more difficult to find a way out when your brain is pickled on pharmas.If you can find herbal suppliments that work like st. johns wort then your saving yourselves a lot of side effects, Dr's are limited by what they can prescribe often to there annoyance . Next time you see your GP ask him if he has anything non addictive or dangerous he can prescribe you-the answer will sadly be no.

[notakid]

Hi
My sister had very bad depression dianozed about 7 years ago. Real problems with work not being very understanding, She had just got married and really this should have been the time she was happiest but thats when she found she couldn't cope anymore. She had a crying jag at work and then after a couple of months she returned the same happened. She was off work a long time and was taking anti depress, councilling and two breakdowns. She couldn't see the wood for the trees, couldn't get up in the mornings or do anything. She was on prosac but it made her want to kill herself so the doctor changed the tablets.
Looking back the signs where always there, she is the type which always sees the glass half empty where I suppose I'm the half full type but she's not a moaner and has always solidered on.
7 years later.....she is still married with a lovely baby girl and is off the tablets, and loving her job (the same one) I'm not saying it will not return as I have learnt alot about this disease from her and know now it can happen anytime to anyone but fingers crossed.
Good luck and there is a light at the end of the tunnel, 'cos I never thought my sister would be okay again.

[tankgirl1]

thanks for all your replys guys - its good to know im not the only one!!

if you havent experienced depression, i think its difficult to understand it. ive lost a relationship, and a job to it. my family all think its just a case of 'thinking positive, and pulling my socks up'.

it isnt though.

perhaps we could all help each other - i think posting on here, and knowing other people are going through the same thing really helps.

oh, and for what its worth- i havent been out today yet, and am still in my pj's :o

[astonsmummy]

Gosh i always felt like i was the only one!
was diagnosed with clinicall dpression aged 14 ( was suffering long before), i was put on amitryiptiline then, cant actually remeber much about back then. i used to see a child psychiatrist but it didnt really help as she was in her late 50's and probably had no idea wat life was like for a 14 year old at that time, also i couldnt really say wat i wanted to.
Have basically been depressed eversince, (it didnt help having a contolling boyfriend who loved to play mind games and a narcisistic father!)
Have always had disturbed sleep - apparently due to depression, and i'm forver tired, i have had the 'black' periods and suicidal thoughts, even cut myself wen i was younger- not very often tho, only if i had a really bad blolw out.
Then in july 2003 i met DS father and thought finally my life was getting better and going somewhere - how wrong was i?!
I fell pregnant a few months later, he cheated and gave me the clap, i found out 2 days after xmas he had a daughter (she was born on that day) and then in the february 2004 he left me, and for 2 months told me he was coming back and he never did.
I then found out he cheated on me practiaclly from day one and had left me for someone else.

I cried every day for the rest of my pregnancy and beyond, during which time my so called cousin would tell me about girls he had been with etc... little did i know one of them was her! (found that out wen spud was 8 weeks old, the day before my birthday)

At 31 weeks pregnant i went into premature labour and spent 5 days in hospital on a drip, then wen i was 37 weeks i went into labour and ended up having to have a c-section which gets to me even now - also just afet i came out of the operating theatre my father threatened to kill me and my mum - i was numb from the neck down and petrefied! I couldnt even hold my baby properly for a few hours.
2 days later DS father told me he was moving in with his gf - the one he left me for (little did i know they had been living together since the day he left)

was feeling quite down but not too bad until 4 months after DS was born i had a phone call to tell me his father had just had a son born, by the one he left me for which means he got her pregnant while we was together! well that knocked me for 6!
I plodded along for another few months then one day very bad day took an obverdose, and completely rejected DS, my mum had to take time off work to look after him. i couldnt even bear to be around him - ( feel eternally guilty for that)
Then i knew i had to sort myself out, i started going to mother and baby group to make new friends and things started picking up, i also moved to be nearer my mum and family.
I didnt want to go on anti depressants as i had a bit of a speed habit before so i didnt want to become dependant.
Now i still get down somethimes but i'm nowhere near as bad as before, i have made lots of new friends and even got back in touch with some old school friends. I go out on the weekends and so i get a break, went to butlins for a weekend last sept, it was the longest time i have ever spent away from spud but it done me the world of good.

I dont really talk about all this stuff as i think people will just think i'm moaning, just want to say thanx to everone who has posted as i now realise i'm not on my own!!

[astonsmummy]

thanks for all your replys guys - its good to know im not the only one!!

if you havent experienced depression, i think its difficult to understand it. ive lost a relationship, and a job to it. my family all think its just a case of 'thinking positive, and pulling my socks up'.

it isnt though.

perhaps we could all help each other - i think posting on here, and knowing other people are going through the same thing really helps.

oh, and for what its worth- i havent been out today yet, and am still in my pj's :o

Same here! thnx for posting in the first place hun xx

[iwanttosave]

thanks for all your replys guys - its good to know im not the only one!!

if you havent experienced depression, i think its difficult to understand it. ive lost a relationship, and a job to it. my family all think its just a case of 'thinking positive, and pulling my socks up'.

it isnt though.

perhaps we could all help each other - i think posting on here, and knowing other people are going through the same thing really helps.

oh, and for what its worth- i havent been out today yet, and am still in my pj's :o
I only got dressed because someone came round :o

Why si it you cant sleep when you need to but you are so sleepy when you have to stay awake :rolleyes: I am soooo sleepy now and trying my hardest to stay awake. I have to go into town today to pay the last of the money on the holiday but I just dont have the energy, I wanna curl up and go to sleep but I cant because it will make it harder for me to sleep tonight. :mad:

[black pudding]

Suffered from depression myself for a while and was on Ciprofen (I think they were called that).
Slowly but surly I got over it.
But, you have to want to get out of the rut. I had to force myself to go out and to mix with people.

Now I couldn't be better - not on any medication at all and enjoying life

[frostyspice]

tankgirl1, you are not alone, but I believe there is light at the end of the tunnel - it's just sometimes that the tunnel is a very long one.

I was diagnosed with depression in 1992, was in and out of psychiatric wards for a couple of years and tried all sorts of anti-depressants, but I'd say that by the end of 1999 I was more or less sorted. This was as a result of Citalopram (a lifesaver for me with the fewest side-effects I've known from any drug) and 5 years of NHS psychotherapy (also a lifesaver).

I'm still on the citalopram and happy to take it indefinitely although it did take me 8 months to come off it to start a family. These drugs are not addictive in the sense that you need more and more of it to feel OK, it's just that the brain doesn't like to suddenly have to do without what it is used to.

I wouldn't wish depression on anyone, it's awful and is a destroyer of lives, including those around the sufferer. I'll never forget what it felt like. It basically wiped out my twenties and stopped my career in its tracks. I've had to come to terms with a life that has been changed because of my illness - but so do lots of people.

No one with depression wants to feel that way. I would say though, that I believe what my psychologist said to me about labelling yourself. Don't think of yourself as a depressive, think of yourself as a person who happens to have an illness which is depression. Too often we let depression define us ("that's what I am, I'll always be like this") and it means that you don't know what to do with yourself when the depression lifts. You can't do a lot of things when you're depressed, but when you feel better you're still scared of doing them because you're out of practice!

Lower your standards and don't be so hard on yourself. So what if you're still in your pyjamas? You're seeking help and support from these boards, and that's good for you in the long term. I reckon that means that you will make it.

Keep posting.

[newfoundglory]

paroxetine (Prozac)
Actually, Paroxetine is not generic Prozac...Its generic Seroxat/Paxil. Fluoxetine is the generic name for Prozac :D

Well i had some bad depression too... i'm not going into details, i'm sure like many of us there are many reasons. But i had this for many years, before i finally went to see my GP about 6 months ago. Came out with Fluoxetine which worked wonders for me in about 2 weeks. I remember once, i had stopped taking it for about 2 or 3 days, i felt like total crap. Suicidal. I had mentally hit a brick wall. In fact, i have kept a whole blog of how i have felt of the last year and some of the things i wrote are quite worrying! But i feel fine now.

I had a hard time accepting that i might be depressed, but the fact the drugs worked so well must mean i was!

I always assumed i could cope with the depression, but not sleeping at night runs you down and drains you until you have nothing left to give. I'd worry so much about EVERYTHING, that it made me ill. A good nights sleep works for me usually.

For those who are severely depressed, who in particular have trouble sleeping, you might want to ask your GP another another anti-depressant called Mirtazapine. Its not an SSRI, and its more powerful.... you take it at night, and it kicks in after about 90mins to 2 hours.

[micheleen]

One of nice things I found with Mirtazapine, is that the lower the dose, the better I slept. Though 'sleep' is a relative term since I was still drinking heavily every day (and night) :o :rolleyes:

[rubytuesday]

I had postpeuperal psychosis/depression after both my children, in hospital for months, then two years ago became ill again out of the blue and spent three months in the Priory. Was very depressed for a long time also developed chronic fatigue/fibromyalgia. All I did was sleep for months. I was referred to the Homeopathic hospital which was helpful but I believe the most helpful think has been excecise (I got my bike out of the cellar and fixed it up after 7 years) and keeping busy. I am doing an extra day at work now, often go to the library and get different books out to my normal choice.Have also started listening to radio 4 again and playing music loudly when I'm in the house alone. Usually prefer complete silence! Sorry if all this sound rather simplistic but it has diffenately worked for me.
Good Luck xxx

[ILoveHenryJames]

I find it difficult to get motivated to do anything, and over the last few years, have found it extraordinarily hard to apply myself, or to concentrate on things.

That has certainly applied to me in the past and probably has to countless others who suffer from depression. Even saying the 'D' word can make one feel less than adequate can't it?

I have had depression for around 15 years (I'm only 25 now) and more than likely will have it for the rest of my life; finding a combination of the correct medication, 'talking therapy', support network and other factors is a monumental task, I know. Also, I know that every clich! about 'you will get through this' and 'depression can be treated successfully' etc gets to be very tiresome, very quickly.

So what can I say to help? Probably nothing. Just to say that despite all the years that have passed where I have shut myself in a dark room alone/cut my arms to ribbons/researched suicide methods/stocked up on pills for an OD/missed important meetings/kept myself off of the dating scene/generally f*cked about instead of achieving something because I was ill/ BLAH BLAH ETC...I am still alive, I am important to someone other than me, I do believe that I will get through this, I will have the career and life I want.

One day I will wake up and the skies will be clear blue. The temperature will be warm but definitely not humid; I will be holding the hand of my beau or belle, I will have a smile and absolutely no memory.

[bluezone]

Everyone needs a 'jim jam' day ;)

[hollydays]

It IS possible to recover from depression.,

[Fritha]

RubyTuesday, I know exactly what you mean, I found just having a routine really helpful, and distrating myself when it all got too much really helpful: the nearby Tescos has seen me in a variety of states of dress when I've had to drag myself out (my mental health lady redcommended it to stop me self harming - something I randomly developed after diagnosis, the brain is a wonderful thing) annoyingly it really helped me to just to walk away when I felt upset. Stuff what they think go out in your jammies (I have!)

And Tank Girl, just do what you have to do to feel better, if you feel happier in your jammies stay in your jammies! My advice (which I have nicked from a book I was lent) would be if you can get dressed and find an excuse to go out then do it, if you can't it really doesn't matter!

Oh, and sorry I can't remember who asked but it is my personal firmly held belief that you can and will get better from depression (although don't ask me on a bad dat I have trouble believing it then!). I've had every bloody person I know chanting that at me for six months. I didn't believe them but dammit, I would now classify myself as kind of betterish!

I resigned from work under a cloud after they dragged me in while I was still really rather wobbly and told me a should be better and I had to come back to work. Stuff and nonsense, everyone gets better at different rates, with some people it just takes a bit of time, you just have to hang in there and keep going to your GP etc and getting as much help as you can.

[Danni]

Actually, Paroxetine is not generic Prozac...Its generic Seroxat/Paxil. Fluoxetine is the generic name for Prozac :D

Thanks- I've been on so many now I get them confused.

I was on fluoxetine first (and since it was generic I should've remembered it right ;))

[funkymonkey]

It IS possible to recover from depression.,

depression is a strange thing - it tends to creap up on you when life is going bad anyway!

some people will never recover or will always have relapses after 20 years of good positive health! others will have one bout for example PND and be fine for the rest of their lives!

sometimes getting depression at a young age can be a blessing. i was terribly depressed at the age of 19 when my younger brother (9) died of cancer. managed to pull myself out of the pit and learnt a lot of coping skills which now help me daily in my job as a nurse.

a smile a day goes a long way XXX

by the way someone on page 1 said that they only put their clothes on in the morning coz someone came round. - there is your answer in a way ......... get people to come round!

also some people sujest eating more fish - omega 3 is meant to help!

[southernscouser]

I've never had depression and touch wood I never do. Not really sure why I'm posting on here, guess it's coz I find mental health quite a fascinating subject! :confused:

I hope no-one takes offence to what I'm about to write. If so please tell me and I'll remove it as I accept it is difficult for some people. :o

When I was younger I used to be of the opinion that people who suffered from depression or other similar illnesses were just weak people! I now appreciate that the brain is the most complex thing on this earth and isn't fault proof.

I don't even know anyone on medication for depression or anything but I just seem to get the impression that all these anti-depressant drugs just mask the real underlying problem. I'm not saying that these drugs aren't good. Of course they are if they help people to lead normal happy lives but I think more should be done to identify what causes the depression in the first place. Without that no-one is ever going to be fully cured.

Now this is all based on my assumption that there is always something pshycologically (sp) wrong! :confused: I don't know whether this is right or wrong? Some people may not even know themselves what is wrong! :confused:

This might sound really daft but I compare it to a flat tyre. You go outside and see you have a flat. You have 2 choices. You can either keep pumping it up everyday or you can take the wheel off and see why it keeps going flat! :confused:

Before I get slated I'm not comparing anyone to an old flat tyre! ;) :p

Anyway I hope you don't mind me barging in here and waffling on. Like I said this wasn't meant to upset anyone so apologies if it has and I will remove this post if so. :)

[iwanttosave]

Come on hun, you know me better than I know myself and you called a fruit loop before now :p

Plus hopefully you know that I aint weak, you have guided me through times when I am at my lowest and highest, when I have sat there crying talking to you (thank for that by the way ;))

Flat tire indeed :rolleyes:

Actually I think you could do some good on this thread :)

[ILoveHenryJames]

I don't even know anyone on medication for depression or anything but I just seem to get the impression that all these anti-depressant drugs just mask the real underlying problem. I'm not saying that these drugs aren't good. Of course they are if they help people to lead normal happy lives but I think more should be done to identify what causes the depression in the first place. Without that no-one is ever going to be fully cured.


I do appreciate what you have said and please do not take this response to be an attack on your words, they sincerley aren't.

The thing about depression is; there need not be a cause which needs to be cured. By this I mean that depression can be a mere case of chemical inbalance.

[southernscouser]

Actually I think you could do some good on this thread :)

Good? I've already probably alienated myself by referring everyone to burnt rubber! :rotfl: :o

[southernscouser]

I do appreciate what you have said and please do not take this response to be an attack on your words, they sincerley aren't.

The thing about depression is; there need not be a cause which needs to be cured. By this I mean that depression can be a mere case of a chemical inbalance.

No offence taken. I'm here to be educated! :)

So in that instance medication is the only option? :confused:

[ILoveHenryJames]

No offence taken. I'm here to be educated! :)

So in that instance medication is the only option? :confused:

I guess so, yes. I really don't know the incidence of it being solely a chemical inbalance and I am sure there are some professionals who will doubt that it being a sole cause exists.

From a personal point of view; I have worked through 'root issues' of my depression in ways such as counselling and CBT but they continue to haunt me somedays by a recurring thought pattern. That said, there are times where I can appreciate that the chemicals in my brain are a little 'messed up'; these times might be when I have just woken up and not had prior chance to make a conscious thought or they can be as I am doing anything at any point. I can be doing the happiest of things with all of my friends, but in a second I can become unhappy.

[iwanttosave]

Good? I've already probably alienated myself by referring everyone to burnt rubber! :rotfl: :o

It has got to be better than some of the things you have called me :rolleyes: :rotfl:

[tankgirl1]

Now this is all based on my assumption that there is always something pshycologically (sp) wrong! I don't know whether this is right or wrong? Some people may not even know themselves what is wrong!


i was told my depression was a physiological thing, as there was no trigger, and when i was first diagnosed with it, life was pretty good - i had no 'underlying issues' or huge problems............ of course i have both in abundance these days :o :rotfl:

[southernscouser]

i was told my depression was a physiological thing, as there was no trigger, and when i was first diagnosed with it, life was pretty good - i had no 'underlying issues' or huge problems............ of course i have both in abundance these days :o :rotfl:

I know this isn't the same but I was watching a programme about people in debt. Now there was this women, who wasn't depressed, and she had a spending problem. Anyway she saw a psycia physchiat shrink and they found that it was all down to the fact that when she was a kid she had all her family round her and they had quite a bit of money!

Anyway as she got older I think one of her grandparents died and money became tight. I think she lost the other grandparent and a parent. Her spending was all down to subconciously taking her back to the happy part of her childhood. She saw spending as a happy time if that makes sense!

Not sure what thats got to do with anything but I just thought of it! :o :rotfl:

[ILoveHenryJames]

i was told my depression was a physiological thing, as there was no trigger:

This is exactly what I was getting at. If there is a lack of a trigger then one could (wrongly) assume that something to correct the physiolgical impairment (ie drugs) would be a simple solution; sadly the way one interacts with the surrounding world is affected and this in turn affects you in the future. It can be a vicious circle.

There are many, many words I could quote from Stephen Fry (himself a sufferer of depression), but I will add this one for now. It seems apt;

"There is never any logical reason for despair. Reason has absolutely nothing to do with it. You can't reason yourself back into cheerfulness any more than you can reason yourself into an extra six inches in height."

[funkymonkey]

i think we should have a thread called beating depression! (if there isnt one already!)

with great ideas of ways to help! for example - i know that sometimes my laptop screan gives me a headache right behind my eyes and makes me feel miserable because i know it only happens when im on the computer for ages - so it reminds me that i should spend some time out from msging on here or other sites!

spending half an hour in my garden really helps!

ive also got a couple of grow bags and am doing my own tomatioes. ive got strawberries in hanging baskets which are gorgeous AND ive got my own vegetable patch - which although is only about 6 foot by three foot - it has two rows of carrots / 2 of onions / 1 of cauliflower/ i of beetroot and 1 of raddishes!

now they are getting bigger it looks so nice! it makes me so proud!


Also i have given up the fags! reading the Alan Carr book empowered me and ive done it! 10 weeks later and ive never felt so proud of myself! im full of energy and just feel great!

i know its hard when you are depressed to even think about giving up the fags but without them you feel more awake - so if you have episodes of depression try and give up when you're not in one!

try to eat more organic stuff - or at least home made. you know whats in it and there are less chemicals causing all sort of horrid imbalances. Oh and cooking gives you somthing to do!

i read so many self help books when i was depressed and none really helped.

sometimes i remember some of the things i did - like i would be walking down a road and seriously contimplate jumping in front of a passing car! can you belive how horifc that sounds! luckily i have the best family and i seriously believe that talking things over can really help!

people arnt meant to live alone - its not the natural way - havig a really large family and lots of siblings really helps! my mums kitchen is like a free starbucks - there are always loads of people sitting drinking coffee and chatting. that helps the most.

so get out there and get some human interaction! im often free for coffees and chats!

[tankgirl1]

LOL at SS- i wish my depression was down to having a rich family, and getting in debt...... actually, my debt was a product of my depression- mostly going out drinking!

ILHJ - i see exactly what you mean- my depression started as something phisiological, but has become something so much more now - something that drugs alone will not fix! i know this, and i try to make changes (such as going to the gym), but it doesnt seem to be working thus far... and that stephen fry quote is fab- thanks :)

funky monkey- this can be the 'beat depression thread!!' maybe i should change the title of the thread :p

[funkymonkey]

yay! and i could start stalking everyone saying "have you had your half hour of gardening today???" LOL

shal be fun!

[ILoveHenryJames]

I don't know if this will help anyone either, but the diary section at netdoctor is something I find useful at times.

http://community.netdoktor.com/ccs/uk/depression/index.jsp

[Miroslav]

thanks for all your replys guys - its good to know im not the only one!!

if you havent experienced depression, i think its difficult to understand it. ive lost a relationship, and a job to it. my family all think its just a case of 'thinking positive, and pulling my socks up'.

it isnt though.

perhaps we could all help each other - i think posting on here, and knowing other people are going through the same thing really helps.

oh, and for what its worth- i havent been out today yet, and am still in my pj's :o

I've heard the "Get on with it, your partner died years ago" line and the "You should be over it all by now" and "You were only a father, not a mother" lines amongst others. Some people's ignorance astounds me.

I've not been out today either :o

If you look in the marriages, relationships section, a thread called 'finding friends', may be useful to you

[frostyspice]

you're so right funkymonkey - giving up the fags really does make you feel good about yourself. I gave up while still depressed and wondered why the hell I was doing it when I started - but as time went by and I had stayed off them I knew that to go back on them would make me hate myself even more!

(over 10 years ago now!)

As for the antidepressants issue - some people seem to be reluctant to take them, feeling that they only address the symptoms and not the cause. Well if you're very depressed, you can't even begin to deal with the cause. The drugs can get you out of the worst and darkest times so that you are physically and mentally able to start thinking about why you're having a depressive response to the world and how you could cope better.

I remember sitting in a psychiatric ward and watching a fellow patient setting his bed on fire, and I was completely unmoved about it! No panic, no feeling that I had to move or anything - now that's depression and when you're in that state, you need help and you can't get out of it on your own.

[NEWBIENEW]

Hello - hope you get this OK as it's my first post. I wouldn't take prescription drugs and instead worked on diet and exercise. Yoga is good for me. I take cod liver oil (not capsules) and molasses every day. Eat lots of fish veg and fruit esp green leafy ones. Try for 80/20 diet where 80 is good and 20 anything you want. Keep alcohol, coffee, chocolate to a minimum. Think positively - kid yourself you are OK and one day it will happen! I think our diet has changed because the way we grow food has changed, so the minerals in what we eat aren't the same - you could try asking your quack for a blood test to see what your zinc and magnesium levels are like? good luck.

[EmmaLi]

I wondered if anyone here has managed to get CBT? And if so, how?

I am 26 with a 9 year history of depression. For 5.5 years I was on medication but told to stop taking it when I fell pregnant in January. I was offered no support or help - my shrink actually decided to tell me to stop taking the tablets and discharge me on the same day. I have been told repeatedly by mental health professionals that CBT would be the best treatment for me but I can't even get on the waiting list. The one person who could refer me is the shrink who discharged me but he's decided that I just have to accept that I have depression and live with it - his words, not mine!

[kaya]

For anybody that doesnt want to take prescription of synthesised medication and wants a starting point do a google search for 5-HTP, its not 5-HTP you buy but a ground up bean so pretty natural, i got mine from a health food store in the town, 5-htp is something your body needs to make serotonin(happy juice), it is offered in many countrys as an alternative to SSRI's and MAOI's and has no nasty side effects, well at least on me!. Delayed ejaculation is a side effect that my Mrs is quite pleased about:rotfl:

[frostyspice]

I wondered if anyone here has managed to get CBT? And if so, how?

I am 26 with a 9 year history of depression. For 5.5 years I was on medication but told to stop taking it when I fell pregnant in January. I was offered no support or help - my shrink actually decided to tell me to stop taking the tablets and discharge me on the same day. I have been told repeatedly by mental health professionals that CBT would be the best treatment for me but I can't even get on the waiting list. The one person who could refer me is the shrink who discharged me but he's decided that I just have to accept that I have depression and live with it - his words, not mine!

You could try asking your GP for referral to a different psychiatrist. I changed psychiatrists and I'm so glad I did. Just tell him you don't get on with the current one.

[ILoveHenryJames]

I wondered if anyone here has managed to get CBT? And if so, how?

I am 26 with a 9 year history of depression. For 5.5 years I was on medication but told to stop taking it when I fell pregnant in January. I was offered no support or help - my shrink actually decided to tell me to stop taking the tablets and discharge me on the same day. I have been told repeatedly by mental health professionals that CBT would be the best treatment for me but I can't even get on the waiting list. The one person who could refer me is the shrink who discharged me but he's decided that I just have to accept that I have depression and live with it - his words, not mine!

I was lucky enough to get on a waiting list and then get accepted on a course of CBT through my NHS GP; this may have been because I sat in her room crying with fresh cuts on my arms saying 'I don't know how I kept myself alive over the past 48 hours'.

I'm really sorry that I can't offer much practical advice on getting CBT any faster; I was planning to pay for it but got accepted so didn't have to.

[Miroslav]

I wondered if anyone here has managed to get CBT? And if so, how?

I am 26 with a 9 year history of depression. For 5.5 years I was on medication but told to stop taking it when I fell pregnant in January. I was offered no support or help - my shrink actually decided to tell me to stop taking the tablets and discharge me on the same day. I have been told repeatedly by mental health professionals that CBT would be the best treatment for me but I can't even get on the waiting list. The one person who could refer me is the shrink who discharged me but he's decided that I just have to accept that I have depression and live with it - his words, not mine!

I was told I was put on a list for CBT, but I find out now, I was forgottten about :rolleyes:

Your shrink needs shooting, no-one good at his/her kind of job would say anything like that :rolleyes:

[Ted_Hutchinson]

Living Life to The Full On-line is a powerful new life skills resource. The course has been written by a psychiatrist who has many years of experience using a Cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) approach and also in helping people use these skills in everday life. (http://www.livinglifetothefull.com/elearning/index.php?option=com_frontpage&Itemid=1)
Don't forget also that ensuring your Vitamin d status is as high as possible will have a beneficial effect on mood see.
Randomized comparison of the effects of the vitamin D3 adequate ... (http://www.pubmedcentral.nih.gov/articlerender.fcgi?artid=506781)
It's also important to ensure omega 3 status is adequate see Omega-3 fatty acids and mood disorders. (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/entrez/query.fcgi?db=pubmed&cmd=Retrieve&dopt=Abstract&list_uids=16741195&query_hl=11&itool=pubmed_docsum)
Do remember that in order for either vitamin d or omega 3 to be effective you have to take and amount that not only meets your current daily needs but to some extent also makes up for the deficit which is likely to underlie your current depression.
The Vitamin d is easy if you gradually build up your exposure to sunlight by going outside every day for a little longer while exposing as much skin as is decent. You need around 30 minutes for an effective amount. For those who want the supplement route BIO-TECH Pharmacal Inc. (http://www.bio-tech-pharm.com/products/d35.html) are quick and efficient and supply an effective dose.
Improving your vit d status will also enable your brain to take up more DHA (an omega 3 essential fatty acid usually low in those with depression, self abusers, potential suicides, domestic abusers, the violent, or those with less severe behaviour problems, if you're not thinking straight the chances are your DHA is low) Omega Juice from Zipvit is the cheapest high strenth source that allows you to get an effective dose in one tsp for minimal cost. Two tsps daily would be better for the first month.
If you can't stand the taste I'm told Cod Liver Oil Liquid - St Clements (http://www.healthspan.co.uk/shop/product.aspx?Id=CODL) tastes better but you shouldn't take more than 2tsps of this and so you'd need some fish oil caps as well to make up to the effective initial 3g omega 3 daily.

Nobody has yet mentioned Exercise and Depression. (http://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/page.cfm?pagecode=PMSTET) It's actually one of the most effective therapies with the most beneficial side effects.

[Dora the Explorer]

The MIND website has good information on St Johns Wort including suggested dose. CBT is a very effective intervention, but like everything else, it isn't suitable for everyone. Living Life to the Full website is extremely useful for anyone who wants to understand why they think the way they do, and perhaps change, and is supported by the NHS.

[razorbladekisses]

I received CBT after being referred to the hospital by my GP. I had to wait about 3-4 weeks for my first appointment. I think it's helped me a little.

I was prescibed paroxetine today, just wondered if anyone has found it to be effective?

Jo.

[kaya]

you can get yout omega 3 simply by changing to organic milk, supermarket milk contains only 1/3 of that of organic milk

[Ted_Hutchinson]

you can get yout omega 3 simply by changing to organic milk, supermarket milk contains only 1/3 of that of organic milkWhile I support the idea of improving the sum total of omega 3 you get through the day you should be aware that the research showing improvement in depression with omega 3 comes from using a SIGNIFICANT amount.

If you read ‘Misleading’ Winston milk ads pulled - Sunday Times - Times Online (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2087-2230614,00.html) you would see that these adverts where pulled for the very reason that while it can be seen that using 550mg omega 3 does improve the concentration of children with ADHD there is no certainty that amounts less than that have a similar effect on "normal" children.

While organic milk does contain more omega 3 than ordinary it still has less than the Fortified St Ivel Clever milk. You would need to drink litres of that to reach over 1g omega 3 and it would simply be impossible to drink sufficient milk to reach the 3g omega 3 necessary to bring someone with low DHA levels up to optimal status. So while I'm all for everyone using organic foods whereever possible for the extra nutritional benefits I still don't think they should rely on that as a sole means of getting omega 3. Now if you were suggesting eating sardines in tomatoe sauce on a daily basis that could be justified as a replacement for supplements as each 125g tin of sardines in tomatoe sauce (the ones in oil are ineffective as the extra omega 6 cancels out the omega 3 leaving the ratio 03-06 the same) contains over 2g of EPA+DHA=OMEGA 3

[Ted_Hutchinson]

I was prescibed paroxetine today, just wondered if anyone has found it to be effective?Paxil (paroxetine) - The Good, The Bad and The Funny. From People ... (http://www.crazymeds.org/paxil.html)A user's perspective of Paxil, along with an interpretation of the PI sheet.

[micheleen]

Paxil (paroxetine) - The Good, The Bad and The Funny. From People ... (http://www.crazymeds.org/paxil.html)A user's perspective of Paxil, along with an interpretation of the PI sheet.
It's known as Seroxat in the UK and has it's own user group here (http://www.seroxatusergroup.org.uk/)

I wasn't on it long enough to know whether it worked or not, it gave me the sh1ts :eek:

[razorbladekisses]

Hmm I'm not sure I want to take it now :/ I'm kind of scared to.

[Ted_Hutchinson]

Hmm I'm not sure I want to take it now :/ I'm kind of scared to.I'm sure the person who prescribed it has had more patients thrive on it that fail. The only way you will know if you are going to get the side effects is by starting to take it. If you know what the side effects might be you are better placed to respond appropriately at that time.
Remember the all these medications work better in a brain properly supplied with omega 3 and vitamin d also will not cause any contra-indications so getting the brain fundamentally right can only help. The sun provides vit d for free and the omega 3 can be found in tinned sardines in tomatoes sauce.

[Dora the Explorer]

Information on medication for mental health problems and also possible side effects is available on the Norfolk Mental Health Trust Pharmacy website http://www.nmhct.nhs.uk/Pharmacy/
HTH, remember - more people post on the web about the side effects they've experienced than do people who haven't experienced any.

[kaya]

Razorbladekisses, ask your GP about 5-HTP as a possible alternative, its a completely natural plant extract available in most health food stores, it works in a very similar way to the drug you have been prescribed but without the nasty side effects, like a supercharged St. Johns wort, it works for me and is a herblal suppliment rather than a synthesised drug, there is much positive info on the net about it, heres a link to get you started
http://www.lightparty.com/Health/5-HTP.html

[micheleen]

Hmm I'm not sure I want to take it now :/ I'm kind of scared to.

When I was involved in a social phobic support group, I knew 3 people who had problems with it. OTOH there were quite a lot more than that who were helped by it. Try it and see, if you know what to look out for then you can go back to the doctor if you have problems with it :)

[tankgirl1]

Hmm I'm not sure I want to take it now :/ I'm kind of scared to.


dont be scared!! i have been on it since tankbaby was born- ive had no nasty side effects- it just wasnt working for me. :)

[micheleen]

dont be scared!! i have been on it since tankbaby was born- ive had no nasty side effects- it just wasnt working for me. :)

I agree that's much more likely than something bad. None of the SSRI's I was on ever helped me :o but it doesn't mean they won't help someone else :)

[razorbladekisses]

I guess you never know with these medications until you've actually tried them.

[funkymonkey]

have you all been out in ya gardens today? lol! or sat in the park in the sun?

[razorbladekisses]

lol nope not me. Have you?

[tankgirl1]

lol- nope me neither- been out to the shops with tankbaby, and met my ma for a brew :rolleyes: thats the extent of my social life these days! :o

[PIGZ]

Hiya all, I've just found this thread and now realise that I am not alone! I've always had a lack of confidence, which then led to anxiety attacks and then on to depression, it was always something I just got on with until last year when I had a breakdown and started throwing things at my children. It worried me that my children weren't safe around me so I took some action and went to the doctors, major first for me. The doctor put me on Paroxetine which just made sleep constantly and made me feel that I wasn't in charge of my own actions, I couldn't do anything for myself and when I went out in the car and stopped in the middle of the road on a green light I knew they weren't for me.
Some days I feel like balling my eyes out all day, other days I threaten to stab everybody, and some days I feel on top of the world. My gran always said there was no happy medium with me and I was either way up or right down.
Unfortunately my daughter whose 7 has also been diagnosed with depression (apparently it can be hereditary, my mum and sister have also suffered with it) and I can see so much of myself in her that it worries me she'll turn out like me, does anyone have any ideas how to break the cycle. The amount of times she has threatened to cut off her arms and legs, starve herself and lock herself in her room is unbelievable, she also cries at everything, even when you say something nice to her, she can't make friends easily and is nervous about joining groups after a bad experience. Will a shrink really help like the docs say? Any advice greatly appreciated please.

[micheleen]

There's lots of things that may help, PIGZ. A good shrink can help especially if they're deciding what meds to try, I knew more about my meds than my GP did ;) . Therapy can also help, whether one-to-one or group. Then there's lifestyle and diet to consider. There's no cure-all since different things help different people, all you can hope for is good help (bad help only makes you worse) and a willingness to try different approaches :)

HTH

[gingin]

PIGZ sorry I can't offer any constructive advice but I really feel for you and hope your daughter gets the help she needs. She is a lucky girl to have a mum who acknowledges there is a problem and wants to support and help her.

I am on Prozac (fluoxetine) and find it is absolutely brilliant at keeing myself nice and level the differences are very subtle and I suffer no side effects other than heartburn occasionally. I had a serious eating disorder and bouts of depression from the age of 12 until I was 26 I am still only 28 but have a lot of skeletons in my closet and the Prozac helps me to balance my mind and look forwards rather than dwell on the past.

[Dora the Explorer]

PIGZ, thank you for writing so honestly. Things sound extremely serious for both you and for your daughter, could you explain exactly how things are to your doctor? They may not fully understand the whole picture. If that sounds a bit difficult, and it can be for all of us, you could print off what you've written to us and ask your doctor to read it.
You want things to change and they will if you can be open and honest with your doctor because you will be taking the first step to changing things. Best wishes.

[ILoveHenryJames]

Unfortunately my daughter whose 7 has also been diagnosed with depression (apparently it can be hereditary, my mum and sister have also suffered with it) and I can see so much of myself in her that it worries me she'll turn out like me, does anyone have any ideas how to break the cycle.

I'm sorry to hear about your difficulties.

Although I am saddened that your daughter also had depression I am pleased that it has been diagnosed at such a young age. As with any depression it is unlikely that you will discover one simple root cause of her illness and rectify it; diagnosis at an early stage in your child's life should enable some preventative treatment and care strategy in order to contain the illness.

Through my counselling sessions, and via my own self-analysis (itself a trait of depression), I discovered that I first started having depressive tendencies when I was 9-10 years old. Now I am at the not-so grand-old-age of 25 I wish I had been diagnosed and helped from a much earlier point in my life; it might have helped me to not have thoughts such as 'I wish I get testicular cancer so that I die and don't have to be around these people'

I'm not going to be blas! and suggest that everything will be perfect from this moment on, but it might help stop your daughter reaching some of the deeper parts of a low ebb in the future.

[bettyboop61]

It has taken me all day to read through the threads on here about depression, yes I suffer with it to, I have suffered since 1999 and have tried many different anti depressants, my last one that I tried was escitolapram and since I have come off them and now currently taking duloxetine, I realise just how bad they were for me, unfortunately, I am now weaning myself off the duloxetine as I don't think they help me either. I currently have an appointment in 2 weeks to see my psychiatrist, who I may add is very good, he has tried to help me in any way he can, I have been offered DBT, and did try it but found that it wasn't for me. I engaged in psychotherapy also but found this too difficult to cope with and hope to take it up again in the future. I have realised that it is a case of trial and error in finding the right anti depressant, although the one that did help most significantly, was also the one that gave me the most severe side effects and even though I was taking medication along side it to lessen the side effects, I still couldn't cope with the side effects so had to stop taking that one as well. My one critiscm of treatment was ECT and I would never have that again even though my psych would like me to try it again, it permanently wiped away alot of my past memories, although not the ones i would like to forget :rolleyes: and have spent the last couple of years being reminded of certain things we have done as a family, that was wiped away by ECT, my short term memory is bad also, but I don't know whether that is because of the depression itself. I empathise with everyone on here about how their illness affects them, I too have trouble getting up in the morning, bothering to get dressed etc. and yes my family have been affected enormously by my depression, and that in itself can create more problems. I too would not wish this on illness on my worst enemy...thats if I have any ... I don't really go out anyway to make any enemies:rolleyes: All I really wanted to say was... there is help out there and it does take courage to go and seek it. It has been interesting to read others experiences coping with depression.
I hope that sometime soon we will all see the light at the end of the tunnel.

[PIGZ]

Thank you all for your comments,

To Micheleen, thank you, the hardest part for both of us is talking to people but I am willing to try anything to give my daughter the childhood that she should be having rather than the one she's stuck with. Maybe if I can overcome my demons she'll be able to do the same.

To gingin thank you, your kind words and thoughtfulness made me feel that maybe I'm not as bad a mother as I so often feel.

To Dora the Explorer, thank you, I always believe honesty is the best policy and if you can be honest with each other then the more help you can give each other. I think i'll try your idea of printing this out as every time I try to speak to the doctor about it I either clam up or cry and convince myself I'm wasting their time.

And to ILoveHenryJames, thank you, I think you're right about it not being one simple root cause, she is very deep and has a lot of skeletons for such a young child, maybe if she gets some help now we can prevent it escalating and there will be light at the end of tunnel.

My OH has said that since I have been on this site, it has been the happiest he has seen me for a long time, there is so much to relate to that you don't feel so alone, I feel like I am part of a very large group of friends.

May we all get the help that we all so much deserve, that the sun shines on us all and that we all find the end of our rainbows. Good Luck everybody.

[abbecer]

Citilopram has worked miracles for me with my second bout PND. I truly believe that without it i would have killed myself. I did agree to counselling as if not they were going to section me. It has been a long hard slog but i've finally come out the other side. I was surprised i got it, especially twice, as i had no worries at all and had a lovely home life. I still take my tablets and still really struggle with lack of energy which is hard with two boys aged 1 and 3. I still find it impossible to sleep during the night until about 5 in the morning then my youngest wakes me when i feel like i could sleep for a week. My optimism has returned and a can look to the future and know it will be good. Things do get better, but it can be a long hard slog.

Love and hugs to all who suffer i know what you are going through.

Rebecca xxx:rotfl:

[karen23]

My one critiscm of treatment was ECT and I would never have that again even though my psych would like me to try it again, it permanently wiped away alot of my past memories, although not the ones i would like to forget :rolleyes: and have spent the last couple of years being reminded of certain things we have done as a family, that was wiped away by ECT, my short term memory is bad also, but I don't know whether that is because of the depression itself.

I also had ECT 15 years ago and I lost a huge amount of memories from the year leading up to it. It was weird as I used to have odd little visions of doing things, being in certain places etc, but I didn't have any actual memory of doing it. My memory is generally good now but I do have problems with taking in new information.....it's in one ear and out the other!

I've been so lucky in that for the past 2 years I've had the most fantastic counsellor (having had several that weren't right for me) who very kindly offered to see me privately for free after my initial 6 nhs sessions. Having 'worked through' most of the c**p in my head I'm now in the process of coming off prozac. I still have really bad times, however I feel I am more able to deal with these now that I understand myself a whole lot better.

Best wishes to all xxxxxxx

[frostyspice]

I had ECT as well, seven sessions in 1992, and like another poster, forgot various things, like trips out and films I'd watched (I'd get a film out on video only to be told by my family that we'd all watched it before!). However in the intervening years a lot of it has come back to me, and let's face it, you forget stuff naturally anyway!

Having said that ... I wouldn't have it again though.

If you're in the queue for treatment outside the ECT room you may notice how many more women than men are in that queue, especially old women. (and the statistics bear this out). I think that's interesting. Are old women's problems (poor health, being widowed, maybe being poor) seen as something which can just be blasted away with a few volts? No one knows how or why ECT works, if indeed it does in the long term - but it's cheaper than CBT and courses of drugs.

The politics of psychiatry is something we need to be aware of.

[rubytuesday]

I also had ECT after the birth of my son 20 years ago. It did actually jolt me out of my depression temporarily so to speak but I think it is barbaric. I made sure before the birth of my daughter 6 years later everyone knew that I totally objected to it were I to become ill again (which I did). However brain still seems to be working fine went onto get a 2-1 degree!
A good book which I swear by is by Dale Carnegie How to Stop Worring and Start Living. Bit old fashioned but brilliant.

[ms_london]

Hi!! What an interesting thread..

I have suffered from depression in the past (am 25) and last Easter I took an overdose, which didnt work. Oh, I wanted it to, it wasnt a cry for help and even the doctors at the hospital were suprised it didnt work and I was gutted, however, I am SOOOOOOOOOOO thankful that I didnt work, and do believe I have been given a 2nd chance at live as it was so close to being over (my eyes have tears in them as I write :rolleyes: !!). I had no "real" reason to feel depressed, so perhaps I have a chemical imbalance, and come off the a/d in January (was only on 10mcg) - and overall I feel fine. I have bad days where I do mope around/overeat/dont want to see anyone - and my mum still worries as if I dont reply to her texts/phonecalls after a certain time, she panics - but I dont blame her as I cant believe I put her through that!!

I feel that the OD really brought things home and I know that I could never get as low as I did then, and I feel grateful that it wasnt successful.

Things are a lot better for me at the moment, am now debt free (which didnt help matters!!) and am going to Oz soon (whoooOOoooo!!) but I am prepared that it may return and I will still have bad days..

I know that diet & exercise plays a huge part in tackling depression, but sometimes I dont even listen to myself and have spent the last few weeks eating horrendously badly & doing no exercise & felt worse for it - I havent felt depressed, just a bit nothing, and then ill because I have been eating so badly - a vicious (sp?) circle really..

At least with the internet you can "chat" to others and realise you are not alone, whether that is whether depression/debt/anything!!

xx

[PIGZ]

Hiya everyone,

How are you feeling now Tankgirl1 hope the changeover is working well.

I haven't been back here for a few days, but I have been sending off for all the freebies and comps which have cheered me up no end especially when its more than just bills popping through the letterbox.

Thought I'd pop back to give you all an update, I've had a good few days, managed to tackle some stuff that I hadn't done before in work which gave me a real sense of satisfaction, read 2 danielle steele books which gave me an excuse to have a good cry, which I did beginning to end, and haven't threatened anybody in at least a week, not purposely anyway lol. Thought long and hard about counselling and am going to give it a shot. So all in all not too bad. Oh and I actually went out with OH one night last week 1st for a long while i've forgotten what a social life is!

My daughter is going off to Israel in two weeks to spend the summer hols over there with her nan and grandad, so she can have a break and a bit of one on one time which I think will do her good, she got invited to someones house for tea the other day and another girl actually called for her to go out to play (she has a lot of trouble making friends), so she's having a good few days as well and when she gets back I'm going to sign her up for brownies to see if that will help her.

Thats me for now, hope everyone else is getting on ok.

Love n Hugs 2 all.

[ILoveHenryJames]

[QUOTE=PIGZ]My daughter is going off to Israel in two weeks to spend the summer hols QUOTE]

Far from wanting to make light of a terrible situation in the Middle East; are you sending her with a bullet-proof vest?

Seriously now, I am please to hear that you have been having a better time recently; these times are very precious indeed. I find that keeping a diary is beneficial, look at the netdoctor link a few posts above for the address.

Oh, and give my love to South Wales. I do miss Caerdydd so much.

[Turning_into_scrooge]

thanks for all your replys guys - its good to know im not the only one!!

if you havent experienced depression, i think its difficult to understand it. ive lost a relationship, and a job to it. my family all think its just a case of 'thinking positive, and pulling my socks up'.

it isnt though.

perhaps we could all help each other - i think posting on here, and knowing other people are going through the same thing really helps.

oh, and for what its worth- i havent been out today yet, and am still in my pj's :o

I'm really bad at the mo i have fibromyalgia and the 2 go hand in hand. I haven't been out of the house now for 3 days or got dressed. I just can't face going out. I also don't answer the door or the phone as i don't want to get into conversation with a friend, which is a bit selfish but i can't think straight at the mo and i have too much on my mind.

[rubytuesday]

Oh wishing you well. I also have fibromyalgia but feeling a lot better. Tried pacing which is helpful and forced myself to get up out and on. You will have better days xxx

[razorbladekisses]

I've been on Paroxetine for nearly 2 weeks now. Tbh I've not felt any better by taking it. I mean I know that they aren't the happy pills that some people refer to them as but I did expect to feel a little better. Lately I've been getting awful headaches lasting a few days and also horrible dreams. I don't know if it's a side-effect of the medication, the depression itself or something completed unrelated.

I just can't be bothered with life. I just want to hide away and be left alone.

[Tiff]

Hi Guys,
I think that what this topic has shown is that there isn't a single recipe or time limit for a cure. We all want to be well now and we are all suffering a variety of different symptoms to different degrees in different circumstances so there isn't one answer. I admire you all for your sharing your experiences. :T You will, God willing, come across a regime that works for you. You have to be open-minded and it's very hard work. A CPN can be a great help - mine is fantastic as is my psychiatrist - but it's still hard work. We have to learn to control what we can't cure. Medication can help when you find the right drug, as can psychotherapy but just as we're all unique, so are our illnesses.
Whatever causes it, it is debilitating and I'm finding that the hardest thing to accept - I don't want to accept that I have bad depression!!! I want my normal life back - NOW!!!
I'm only part way through my fight against depression, anxiety, agoraphobia & Post Traumatic Stress and every day is hard. One thing I have learned after 9 years, is that it can happen to anyone, that I'm not alone and if there's one thing I can offer to this thread, it's that however well or badly we're doing it, we're survivors! That's amazing! Don't be pushed away by anyone - shout until they get you all the help you can. There are good resources out there and kind people too.
I'm not belittling what we're all going through - it's cruel and I still can't see the wood for the trees. Being kind to yourself can be a great weapon to have. If you can just grow a little bit of love for yourself, you'll never be alone - you'll always have yourself to turn to. And you have to hold on to that little spark of happiness when it happens because if you can feel it once, you can feel it again. This is what I'm tying to understand & work towards.
I'm sorry for the length of this & for not having the answers we all need. I'm sorry if it didn't sounds like I'm preaching - I'm not honestly :o - and I hope I haven't upset anyone.
I'm thinking of you all - good luck to all of us. :grouphug: xxx Tiff

[urban spirit]

I'm really bad at the mo i have fibromyalgia and the 2 go hand in hand. I haven't been out of the house now for 3 days or got dressed. I just can't face going out. I also don't answer the door or the phone as i don't want to get into conversation with a friend, which is a bit selfish but i can't think straight at the mo and i have too much on my mind.
I have ****** turningintoscrooge, I know how you feel-theyre similar conditions. Ironically, i'm not on long tonight cos i'm feeling very blue! I'm avoiding contact and........I dont really want to say any more about it other than I understand.

I took seroxat a few years ago after planning and escaping from my horrible partner. I found that they gave me such horrendous nightmares, and made the darker bits much darker, wanted to do damage - they were really awful. Not intending to scare anyone, simply passing on my experiences. Felt better when off them-GP wouldnt have it that it was the tabs. Recently been lots of info in the media linking these to....well, lots of very bad side effects lets put it like that.

There are other drugs on the market for anyone who chooses that route. You may have to try a couple to find one that agrees with you.

I feel a TOTAL FAILURE feeling like this. Nobody knows - I hide it all very well - but thats ironic as how do I get help when i'm ready if no-one knows? Silly person.

(I will probably wipe this post tomorrow-all this is a secret)

[oldandhappy]

I had the horrendous nightmares when on the Anti-D's and could not get through to the Doctor that it was the Drugs.I also had a lot of other horrid reactions but it was like talking to a brick wall. They do no suit some people ok but not me.There are alternatives like St.Johns Worts but I found you have to stick with them..You should not take both anti-d's and st.johns wort though at the same time. There is always a reason/cause why depression/anxiety hits you...finding the cause and answer is hard but boy when you get there and you will with determination for living...you will over the moon. I beat it now for 2 years......

[gingin]

I had the horrendous nightmares when on the Anti-D's and could not get through to the Doctor that it was the Drugs.I also had a lot of other horrid reactions but it was like talking to a brick wall. They do no suit some people ok but not me.There are alternatives like St.Johns Worts but I found you have to stick with them..You should not take both anti-d's and st.johns wort though at the same time. There is always a reason/cause why depression/anxiety hits you...finding the cause and answer is hard but boy when you get there and you will with determination for living...you will over the moon. I beat it now for 2 years......

I take prozac and I have had 3 huge nightmares over the last 4 nights. My Grandad died of cancer on Thursday which obviously is going to part of the cause but these are so vivid and I wonder whether the prozac is not helping( 1st one was husband having multiple affairs! Second my Dad had skin cancer and last night my daughter was run over). I have been really pleased with the prozac as I said before but these nightmares are really traumatic and I hope they don't continue.

[urban spirit]

So sorry to hear about your grandad gingin.

Had you taken prozac before these nightmares and were ok??? The nightmares sound like grieving ones, as they all had loss or potential loss to you and thats what youre going through right now.

When my mum died I had many dreams about losing my boyfriend, and I know this was me grieving.

If youve only just started taking them and are getting nightmares, they may be due to the tablets.

[gingin]

No, I have been taking them for a while now and whilst I do get nightmares from time to time I guess it probably is a grieving type thing, particularly as all my nightmares are about losing people close to me. It's just that they are so vivid that scares me and I hope they don't continue.

[patchwork cat]

Hi
I have been on Prozac for 7 years +. It does give me nightmares and nightsweats periodically. Depression is an illness and a nightmare - so many people think that you are just lazy or indulging yourself. I do find that if I can make myself do things I do feel a bit better.

I would love to give up my medicine. I also have a condition called trimethylaminuria - only mildly though and read the other day that it may affect the way I metabolise anti depressants. I think that I am going to try to wean myself off the tablets slowly to see if I feel any worse . Every review I have with th eDr they ask me how are you do you want to start reducing the dose. I am so scared that they will decide to reduce my dose that my husband has to come with me to the Dr's.

It is liberating talking about my depression as if I talk to other people they judge me.

I have had a couple of bouts of counselling, but they didn't help much. It did help me a lot when one counsellor said - you are not mad just reacting to life events.

My depression came on after I lost 80+ % of my family in 5 years.

[Tiff]

Hi Guys,
I couldn't help but reply to gingin's post in particular. Gingin, I really feel for you and I'm thinking of you. It does sound like part of the grieving process to me & the nightmares will pass angel. On top of every other trauma (7 of them!), my dad died in December & we buried him on 20th December which was hard not just because of Christmas but because 25th December is my birthday. I'm still crying and it still hurts but my nightmares are retuning to their 'normal' pattern.
You've had a huge shock angel so just be kind to yourself and concentrate on getting through the hours and minutes and not days for now. It's so natural to feel what you're feeling. I'll keep in touch with this site - I'm sure everyone of us is giving you a group hug. Wishing I could do more angel but you're not alone and with all you described, you're a survivor gingin.
Warmest Regards,
Tiff x

[mrsw]

I just want to say thanks to everyone who has posted on this thread. I have no personal experience of depression, but my mother had a breakdown about 6 years ago and was hospitalised at our request. She slowly got better, but now seems to be on a downward slope again. I must confess that even after all these years, I have found it hard to understand her illness, so reading other people's experiences makes me realise that a lot of what she is going through is quite common.

I also agree that having a good CPN can make the world of difference. The nurse assigned to my mother was brilliant with her, but sadly he retired, and she refused to see anyone else afterwards.

[Dora the Explorer]

I have had a couple of bouts of counselling, but they didn't help much. It did help me a lot when one counsellor said - you are not mad just reacting to life events.



What a wise counsellor. Often how we deal with things is a normal reaction to an abnormal event. An example would be the people involved in the 7 July bombings feeling depressed and anxious. Best wishes to everyone.

[gingin]

Hi Guys,
I couldn't help but reply to gingin's post in particular. Gingin, I really feel for you and I'm thinking of you. It does sound like part of the grieving process to me & the nightmares will pass angel. On top of every other trauma (7 of them!), my dad died in December & we buried him on 20th December which was hard not just because of Christmas but because 25th December is my birthday. I'm still crying and it still hurts but my nightmares are retuning to their 'normal' pattern.
You've had a huge shock angel so just be kind to yourself and concentrate on getting through the hours and minutes and not days for now. It's so natural to feel what you're feeling. I'll keep in touch with this site - I'm sure everyone of us is giving you a group hug. Wishing I could do more angel but you're not alone and with all you described, you're a survivor gingin.
Warmest Regards,
Tiff x

Thanks Tiff,

Sorry to hear of your troubles.

I've actually dealt with my Grandad dying well, but I have a really awful habit of internalising things so I think it is just my subconcious telling me to perhaps "let it out" a bit more which on Prozac makes things difficult!

Saying I'm a survivor is a lovely thing to hear and although it doesn't sound very modest I agree with you. I got over something that I never thought I would. It occupied every waking hour for almost 15 years (and I'm still relatively young!) and it feels very empowering to have been able to stop it. I honestly believe it has made me so much more of a stronger person than had it not been a part of my life.

Thanks once again

[minxmiss]

Oh where do I start, and I apologise in advance if this turns out to be a long rambling post. :o

I have suffered depression since I was 15ish, and it has been a battle every single day with it. Even now I can feel the tears welling. It is a hard thing to live with, and I wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy.

I have been on and off anti d's for most of my life. I have the kind of depression with a chemical imbalance, but outside factors do contribute to it too, such as me losing my grandfather earlier this year.

When I am low, I am so so low and just cannot do anything. Even looking after my children can be very hard and I feel so bad that they have to see their mother in such a state all the time.

I also have an accute paranoia which goes with my depression and it can really spiral out of control. I have lost friends due to this and recently a very close friend due to the fact that they seem to not understand how a depressed person works. They don't seem to be able to grasp that yes I am having mood swings, but it isn't me, it is actually what is going on in my head that is doing this.

I did a silly thing just over a month ago and took myself off my fluoxetine. I felt so so much better and I was really getting on with things, but I then started the dreaded mood swings. Since then I have nearly gone through with finishing myself off 3 times, and am really near enough rock bottom at the moment. I am thinking I will have to go back on the fluoxetine again.

I have also developed a drink problem with this as I now have to drink everyday, altho I am trying to stop that as it is doing me no good. I smoke constantly throughout the day and barely eat. I am losing weight rapidly and have a general non interest in life.

I am lucky that I have a very understanding partner who helps me time and time again through it all. He even puts up with my paranoid thoughts about him as he understands me so much.

I think it is something I will have for life, but with my medication and the support I recieve from my family and friends I know that I will be ok. I know that they will do everything in their power to help me through my worst days and take me safely to the other side.

I want to wish everyone on here who suffers all my love as I know it can be such a physically draining illness, my thoughts are with you all xx

[skyrocket]

Has anyone tried sam-e for depression? My hubby found fluoxetine curbed his creativity (he is in a very creative job) and it killed his sex drive completely. So he came off it but to be honest he does need something. He tried st johns wort which works great but did nothing for him. I have heard about sam-e but I don't know if it's any good or anyone who has tried it. Ted? Anyone? Is it any good and what dosage should he take?
Sky xxx

[Miroslav]

I think I mentioned in a previous post, that I was going to ask about leaving my Psychotherapy group.

I have mentioned it, but they think I am not ready to move on, so I am sticking with it for now. I don't feel it helps, but then nothing does.

I hope everyone is feeling okay today :)

[urban spirit]

Hi Slavvy :wave: and everyone

I've had a really really awful day today, very crushed and bruised.

Slavvy - are you happy staying with your group? Maybe if nothing helps, its not time yet-? Honestly not meant to upset you, just a question.

We all deal with things in out own time, but people can play the universal time card of how long they think you should take, when not going through it themselves.
How inconvenient of us to take longer :rolleyes2

Minxmiss - can I ask why you stopped taking your tabs??? If they help, it probably would be best to stay on them. Love and hugs to you too xx

[Miroslav]

Hi Slavvy :wave: and everyone

I've had a really really awful day today, very crushed and bruised.

Slavvy - are you happy staying with your group? Maybe if nothing helps, its not time yet-? Honestly not meant to upset you, just a question.

We all deal with things in out own time, but people can play the universal time card of how long they think you should take, when not going through it themselves.
How inconvenient of us to take longer :rolleyes2

Minxmiss - can I ask why you stopped taking your tabs??? If they help, it probably would be best to stay on them. Love and hugs to you too xx




:wave:

Crushed and bruised? What have you been up too?

I'm not overly happy staying, but as you say maybe it's not time yet, although I been waiting so long, the time may never come.

Oh yes, the univeral card, of "you should be over it by now" See on the 'finding friends' thread, i've been accused of being a sulker :o

Hope you are having a better day today :T

[minxmiss]

Hi Slavvy :wave: and everyone

I've had a really really awful day today, very crushed and bruised.

Slavvy - are you happy staying with your group? Maybe if nothing helps, its not time yet-? Honestly not meant to upset you, just a question.

We all deal with things in out own time, but people can play the universal time card of how long they think you should take, when not going through it themselves.
How inconvenient of us to take longer :rolleyes2

Minxmiss - can I ask why you stopped taking your tabs??? If they help, it probably would be best to stay on them. Love and hugs to you too xx




Thankyou xx

I came off them because I was doing absolutely fantastic, the best in years in fact. I was on such a high and even my partner could see how well I was doing off them. I then had my unfortunate turn of events and plunged straight down.

It's amazing how one thing can topple you so quick, and now I know that I can't of been ready to come off them and honestly don't think I ever will be if I can go like that so quick.

[urban spirit]

:wave:

Crushed and bruised? What have you been up too?

I'm not overly happy staying, but as you say maybe it's not time yet, although I been waiting so long, the time may never come.

Oh yes, the univeral card, of "you should be over it by now" See on the 'finding friends' thread, i've been accused of being a sulker :o

Hope you are having a better day today :T

Crushed and bruised - work AGAIN. ITs awful, and i'm not going to say anymore.

You are NOT a sulker, disregard that stupid comment.

I'm avoiding things today - for now. Need to make some very awkward phone calls shortly :rolleyes:

Are you sitting in a bath of cold water to keep you cool in this heat :)

Hope youre having a good day too :D

[Miroslav]

Crushed and bruised - work AGAIN. ITs awful, and i'm not going to say anymore.

You are NOT a sulker, disregard that stupid comment.

I'm avoiding things today - for now. Need to make some very awkward phone calls shortly :rolleyes:

Are you sitting in a bath of cold water to keep you cool in this heat :)

Hope youre having a good day too :D



Hope it's sorted soon :o

I didn't think I was. I do get down alot, but not a sulker.

Awkward? Is this to do with work situation?

Nah, no cold bath yet, but lots of drinks and cold water over my head :cool:

Too much housework to do. We have propery surveyor coming next Friday, and need to do alot of housework as when down you let things go. Need to alot of painting and go in corners I haven't been in for a while :o

[Tiff]

I've been on Paroxetine for nearly 2 weeks now. Tbh I've not felt any better by taking it. I mean I know that they aren't the happy pills that some people refer to them as but I did expect to feel a little better. Lately I've been getting awful headaches lasting a few days and also horrible dreams. I don't know if it's a side-effect of the medication, the depression itself or something completed unrelated.

I just can't be bothered with life. I just want to hide away and be left alone.

Hi - I had to reply to your post - you sounded so desolate and in the shadows. Some medication as I'm sure you know can have side effects for a couple of weeks or a month so it could be side effects. Alternatively, different medications take different periods of time to kick in for differrent people.
I hope you didn't mind me replying angel. If you feel that rough you need to go back to the doctor. If nothing else maybe they can put your mind at rest.
Don't hide away - you'll be depriving the world of your personality. And the wanting to be left alone is the biggest cry for help - I have that experience;)
- and your worst enemy, although it doesn't feel that way at the time.
I hope you're feeling better. I just wanted you to kow you're not alone. I'm new here but there seems to be some really good souls on this thread.
Much Love
Tiff x

[Tiff]

Following on from my "In the same boat..." post - forgive the pun! groan...
I'm checking in on our threads nearly every day just to see how we're all doing. ;)
In lots of ways, we're all saying the same experiences, thoughts and the feeling of isolation. Our various problems make us feel lost, low and feeling helpless. I think it's wonderful that we're able to share these things here. I have never spoken to anyone before about my experiences and your posts really do touch me and I find myself honestly caring because I can relate to a lot of the posts.
It is hard for other people to do that - it's not that they don't care: they're either frightened of mental illness (though I tell them I don't know anyone with mental ill health who has their own axe!!!:D ) or they can't relate to our illness and understand it. And we can't tell them when we're at our lowest, how it feels. But it's the same for all severe health problems - we might react the same way - ridiculous example to use I know, but I couldn't relate to someone with rabies because I haven't expereinced it...although I do have a teenager just leaving school, if that counts.:eek:
I sometimes feel like I'm the only one in the world with my illnesses (physical too) and totally withdraw but what I really need more than anything is a hug & someone to just listen without throwing well-meaning advice at me. Or just some quiet time and space to regroup my defences. I drive myself mad trying to think logically of ways to get cured but until a miracle cure arrives - and don't hold your breath! - I've got to learn to manage it.
You can't treat depression as an illness like measles (4 weeks later and you'll be okay). And that's the unfairness of it all. The first step I'm trying to learn is to recognize when I need help and to ask for it. If it's any help, my CPN told me that if you can go that far down, then you can come up again as nothing remains at a constant level not even depression and anxiety - it's impossible.
I'm sorry for the long post guys:o
I feel privileged to be sharing your experiences with you. It made me smile to realise that no matter how badly off we think we are, here we are sharing advice, experience, pain and the encouragement that it will change.
So, the story so far is ... we're all in the same boat, going up the same s*** creek and what I want to know is...
DID ANYONE BRING A PADDLE?!!;)
Wishing you all well,
Tiff x

[bettyboop61]

A big hello and hugs to all of us out there suffering!

I have been following the threads on here every day, most days its all I can do just sit and read, I haven't come here to spout words of wisdom, because as you all know depression is all consuming and nothing seems to help some days. I have an excellent CPN who I see everyweek, and without her to listen to me I don't know what I would do, like many of you I feel totally isolated and unable to talk to people in general because I guess they can never fully understand what it is like to be depressed.

I mean is it normal to wake up in the morning and start crying for no apparent reason, I cry because I just can't face the day ahead and all I want to do is to go back to sleep and escape into oblivion. Some days I know it is naughty of me but, I use my tablets to sleep 1 -2 days away, I have sleeping tablets and benzodiazepenes, I know it isn't the answer but, it is the only way I can cope sometimes!!
And then I get days like today, when I am feel I can cope a little bit and then go mad catching up on the jobs I have missed on my down days. I guess I am lucky in that I don't work, so I don't have those pressures, and that my children are all adults now, but they weren't when i first started suffering with depression, so they have seen me go in and out of hospital on a number of occasions, of course I am racked with guilt for putting them through all of this. I am ashamed to say that I have attempted suicide on a number of occasions as well, the last time being only 3 months ago:cry:

Anyway I didn't mean to ramble on so much, I just wanted to say hello to all my fellow sufferers out there, and to say that i have managed to shower and get dressed as well today, so that is an achievement for me.

I feel like I want to reach out and hug you all. Take care everyone

[gingin]

It's a bit of a self indulgent post here from me :o . I thought I was doing o.k but I have just had a great big weeping session and I feel so much better for it. The last couple of days have really got on top of me, husband away with work, hot and cranky children. This morning I woke up to find that my daughter had blocked up the toiled with loo roll. I then took her to the supermarket and she had a massive tantrum as she is exhausted with not being able to sleep in this heat, she never does this normally and some old bloke decided to make a really snide comment about it out loud. I was so upset.

I think I thought I was dealing o.k with my Grandad dying but I guess inside it has all been churning away I had a big heart to heart with my mum about things this morning, the funeral is tomorrow and there is a very long story behind it all that would take forever to write down but I was not looking forwards to it at all but having talked to my mum I feel so much better. I think getting tomorrow out of the way will be good for me. Tomorrow might also be a real mixed day of emotions as my SIL is being induced tonight so by tomorrow I could well be an Auntie again which is lovely.

Whenever I feel down now I try and stop for 10 minutes and think how I can turn things around. My son breaks up from school today and I am really looking forwards to the summer holidays. I made the children up activity bags with little things to keep them amused over the holidays so I will give them those tonight.

Big hugs to everyone. I hope we can all use this thread as a completely non-judgemental and anonymous way to put our thoughts and feelings down that perhaps we don't have the courage to tell anyone else.

Inbetween writing this DD has come downstairs from her nap and appears to be in much better spirits so here's hoping the day continues to get better :)

[Mrs A.]

hi i just found this thread and spend a couple of hours reading all the posts
i am looking for some advice about what to expect really?
i have sufferrred depression for years been on just about every anti-depressent known to man had a visist from a cpn 2 and a half years ago and he said he wasnt going to follow me up must have persuaded him that i was fine. you see i am a staff nurse who nurses vulnerable elderly patients and i feel like i have to keep my depression secret from my work. i feel that if work knew about it my career would be over i am just about managing to cope with going to work everyday but the mere thought of going to work depresses me. i like my job and get on well with all my colleagues it just tires me out so much.
my gp has referred my to a psychiatrist and i have an appointment with him in 3 weeks it says on the letter that my appointment will last between 30 -60 minutes what will happen at this appointment?
gp says medications are not working and i have to agree with her. i would love to give up my job but sadly cant afford to. depression and hiding it has such a huge impact on my life i feel i am never going to recover and be able to lead a "normal" life. gp says my depression is endogenous so harder to treat but i am convinced the root cause is work and workning shifts. i constantly overeat i cant remember the last time i ate a proper meal i eat crisps, biscuits and chocolate all the time and drink about 30 cups of tea a day in addtion to smoking 30 cigs and not doing any exercise all of this must have a bearing on my depression i know but i feel too low to move my body and make a decent meal or get my bike out and go for a cycle.
can anyone tell me what this psychiatrist will do for me.
regars
mrs a

[Tiff]

hi i just found this thread and spend a couple of hours reading all the posts
i am looking for some advice about what to expect really?
i have sufferrred depression for years been on just about every anti-depressent known to man had a visist from a cpn 2 and a half years ago and he said he wasnt going to follow me up must have persuaded him that i was fine. you see i am a staff nurse who nurses vulnerable elderly patients and i feel like i have to keep my depression secret from my work. i feel that if work knew about it my career would be over i am just about managing to cope with going to work everyday but the mere thought of going to work depresses me. i like my job and get on well with all my colleagues it just tires me out so much.

-Hi Mrs.A,:)
I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time. Admitting you want help, even to yourself, is scarey. So what do we do? We put on our masks & pretend that everything's okay. Which becomes more and more stressful everyday. The fact that you've managed to do such a demanding and caring job is a credit to you.:) Of course you're exhausted!
On the bright side, once you've seen the psychiatrist and you've got help - which you will get - you won't feel quite so exhausted. Depression is an illness like any other angel. No shame there. Is there any way you could switch to a different ward for a while? Would that help?

my gp has referred my to a psychiatrist and i have an appointment with him in 3 weeks it says on the letter that my appointment will last between 30 -60 minutes what will happen at this appointment?
-he psychiatrist will take notes, and start to form a treatment plan or maybe a diagnosis. They will LISTEN. You may fill out some evaluation sheets about how you feel. It is completely confidential.

gp says medications are not working and i have to agree with her.
- So she's done the right thing by referring you to a specialist who does know about a whole range of medications.

i would love to give up my job but sadly cant afford to. depression and hiding it has such a huge impact on my life i feel i am never going to recover and be able to lead a "normal" life. gp says my depression is endogenous so harder to treat but i am convinced the root cause is work and workning shifts. i constantly overeat i cant remember the last time i ate a proper meal i eat crisps, biscuits and chocolate all the time and drink about 30 cups of tea a day in addtion to smoking 30 cigs and not doing any exercise all of this must have a bearing on my depression i know but i feel too low to move my body and make a decent meal or get my bike out and go for a cycle.
can anyone tell me what this psychiatrist will do for me.
regars
mrs a

-if you spoke to any of the one in four people that have some kind of depression, these symptoms would be so common. Try and keep an open mind as to what the root cause is - that will make it easier for you to work
with. Your lifestyle is just as common to others with depression. I think it's the loneliest illness in the world but you CAN regain your life angel. It seems impossible I know but it will happen. No magic cure and no set timescale but if you can be totally honest and open with your psychiatrist, the help is there. Don't hold anything back. the financial pressure to keep working is understood but if you had, God forbid, pneumonia, would you still drag yourself to work? it's making matters worse for you angel.Can't you take sick leave?
Don't be frightened of the psychiatrist - he will help put things into perspective for you.It may difficult for you to deal with all your emotions and pressures at once, bt like you they are professionals and WANT to help.
I'm not preaching to you angel - I wouldn't do that to you.
I tell you all this from many awful experiences that took hold of my life and left me with severe depression. And no I'm not 'cured' yet but I'm learning to manage my life and to be kind to myself as well as all the other help I'm getting from my team. I'm doing things now that seemed impossible! :)
I'm thinking of you & if you post on this forum, I'll be hear to listen as will the other posters. I just wanted to reassure you that you have nothing to lose & everything to gain and that you will get there in the end!
Very best wishes. x

[wigginsmum]

My sister was diagnosed with clinical depression at 11 and has been on amitryptiline for the past 26 years. It's not ideal, but she can't function without it (so far). On it, she has managed to qualify as a psychiatric nurse (she manages the team on the ward where she was once a patient) and cope as a single mum, and frankly that's preferable to her being sectioned again after suicide attempts. She finds hers goes in 2 year cycles - every other Spring is bad for her but now she knows the pattern, she and the doc increase her dosage for as long as it lasts.

[rose07]

hi

i had depression a few month ago and may still have it, it was and is hard for the people that go through it but also the people that care for and love the people going through depression, it can control you like nothing else.

somedays you may feel like doing things and then other days you hit a low time your self esteem goes you dont feel motivated and you just have a bad time of it. not even wanting to get out of bed as you see no point to the day.

i am not on anything for the way i feel, dont want to take anything as dont believe it will help i have been asked.

i think the main thing is to get the help and support you need, i felt like i had no one at all but something, or someone made me see that i did have people there and this really counts for something.

hi mrs a,

in the appointment the psychiatrist will sit you down and talk with you, is it a pre visit? - this is where they have a talk with you to see if they have the right course of action for you.

i had one on tuesday, it was ok, little scary and nerve racking, but ok, main thing they are there to help you.

you may want to keep this a secret from people at work, but i found that if i kept it a secret from people they knew anyway, and sometimes if your going through something the more people around you to help and help you understand it all the better for you. hope this makes sense to you?

big hugs and love to all the people out there who going though a bad time at the moment, it can be hard to see if there is a way out but if you have people and support you may never need to feel like your facing it alone.
xxx

[astonsmummy]

Hi all,

I've not posted for a while - wish i had of done really, Today i had one of my 'blow outs' I've been quite down for a couple of weeks now.
I thought i had things sorted, got myself a new job but last week i was so down i called in sick, then i was gonnna go back this week but got carpal tunnel syndrome in my hand and got signed off (my boss wasnt too pleased and was really rude to me)
I dont really know why i am down there isnt anything in particular, just lots of little things.
I just feel like i cant cope, DS has hit terrible two's and its really hard for me, i have such a low tollerance and feel like i'm forever shouting NO!

My mum has just about had enought of me and i dont blame her, i'm rude, snappy, talk to her like she's a bit of sh*t and there is no reason for me to coz she's the best mum anyone could want.
I dont even know how it started but we ended up haveing a row today, i stormed off in my car, and when i was driving along i really thought about driving into a lamppost on my way home.
I got in, smashed my kitchen up and front room, just completely lost it.
Then i looked round and DS was just standing there looking at me emotionless - what am i doing to him? sometimes i think he'd be better off in care.

I phoned the samaritans - sobbing my heart out, desperate for someone to talk to and i was met with awkward silences, and told to 'go to my library and get some leaflets' I just put the phone down.

I'm soo fed up with being so angry and upset all the time - so i thought sod it, and rang social services - i didnt want them to take DS away really, but i didnt know what else to do, noone else seems to listen!
Anyways, the girl i spoke to was so lovely, she stayed on the phone for about 40 mins, then rang round some people and has sorted out a docs appointment, someone from surestart to give me a home visit, to see what support they can give me at home.
They can also help me with my debts - which is really getting me down too.
I still feel absolutely miserable and cant see a light at the end of the tunnel but i know i've got to try and be strong for spud.
I just want to feel happy :(

[Marsh Samphire]

I've had depression and been on and off anti-ds for the last 20 yrs. I seem to bumble along OK for a few months or years and then gradually go on a downward spiral until I realise I need help again. I've had shed loads of counselling etc and GP reckons it's a chemical imbalance. Currently on prozac (again) and had been feeling a bit better. I also have very vivid dreams (have done for years) and a few months ago my gp suggested taking the prozac in the morning and not at night like I had been doing. My consultant has also given me 10mg amitryptaline to take before bed and it helps me sleep better without dreams.

So, I was feeling a bit better and then 4 wks ago had a sore throat and swollen glands, went to surgery and nurse said see the doctor, next appt was 1 wk later but before that came round was too ill to go in to work. Doctor says "a virus" and I was off for 3 wks, seems to be something like glandular fever the doc said. Now going back to work on a phased return as ordered by doctor. HR are fine but line manager is being horrible. She rang me 3 times in 1 wk when I was off sick, even though I had informed her that I was signed off and sent the doc's cert in. HR agreed to me going back 9.30 to 1pm for first week but on Weds (my day off) line manager again phoned at home to say I had arrived at work 20mins early on Monday and she told me off for not sticking to the agreement (traffic is bad going to work and I worried about being late so over compensated and arrived too early!)

Then today, she calls me in for a 1-2-1 and has a go at me for not being a team player, says I always want to take leave without consulting the team (not true because we have to request leave from her before we book anything and we have a chart on the wall that I always check to see who else has booked time off first).

So I'm feeling even more down than I was. My colleague says the line manager is picking on me and that she had similar problems with the same line manager about a year ago, but it eventually stopped and it seems she has now fixated on me to pick on.

If I say anything to HR it will make it worse because when I was off sick and arranging the phased return with HR I mentioned that she kept phoning me but HR told her I said something and she called me again to say I had been telling tales to HR about her!!!!

Hopefully I can weather the storm, she goes on leave for 2 wks soon and is always in a better mood when she's had some leave and things might settle down then.

Sorry for the long ramble. Reading this thread reminds me I'm not alone feeling like this and it can get better.

[Zeusie]

Just found this thread.

I was diagnosed a fortnight ago with depression. Just not coping with things a lot of the time.

Doc wanted me to take prozac but I'm not keen to get started in prescription anti-depressants and she gave me an alternative: SuperEpa fish oil capsules.

Apparenty some studies have shown that the epa in fish oil helps to restore chemicals depleted in the brain through stress and so I thought I'd give it a go. Can take a few weeks to kick in apparently.

Has to be SuperEpa capsules (not just Epa) containg 330mg of Epa in each capsule. Three a day give you nearly 1000mg a day which is the recommended dosage.

Just thought i'd mention it for others who are interested.

[PIGZ]

Hi all,

I've not posted for a while - wish i had of done really, Today i had one of my 'blow outs' I've been quite down for a couple of weeks now.

I still feel absolutely miserable and cant see a light at the end of the tunnel but i know i've got to try and be strong for spud.
I just want to feel happy :(

Hiya astonsmummy, I just wanted to say that you can get there hun, I know exactly how you feel at the moment, going through the same thing myself, been really low for a few weeks and it all just seems to be mounting up until you erupt. My OH has to keep me in check because I start taking things out on the kids, which I did earlier, my oldest just topped off a bad day for me so I ended up smacking my youngest for the most trivial thing which made me feel even worse, and hate myself even more.
Can't you email your mum to tell her how you feel and that you do appreciate her, I find things easier to put into writing to explain how I feel than to actually talk to someone. I'm sure the last thing she would want is for you to feel so alone and down that you would think of hurting yourself or putting your little one into care.
If you ever need anyone to talk to you can PM me anytime, I tune into this site nearly every night, I haven't got a miracle cure (god knows I could do with one myself) but if it helps you can cry on my shoulder. Thinking of you.

[urban spirit]

Hi All

Apologies - i'm catching up on the posts in here but nothings going in cos i'm so tired.

Sending everyone ((((((HUGE HUGS))))) from the heart and wishing everyone better days xxxxx

[mclaren]

i seen urbs on here so i thought i would give a post ago.

i was diagnosed last year with anxiety and depression - wont go in to details but i have scars on my arm. couldnt cope so after some "things" were tried, put me on trazadone - did have others befoer, had fluoxetine and another prozac one but both didnt agree with me.

one im on now seems to be ok - though have had some setbacks - was sent to see a psyc but i found it hard to get up to see him - doc said that other theripy might help - she is looking at some.

one thing i have probs with is sleep, waking up and getting up and getting "energy" - i sometimes feel like i just wana sleep but i KNOW i have to get up - but have probs actually doing it - even worse when people call you lazy, pathetic and sad :(

also find it very hard to be with alot of people - feel very uneasy - and if in a room of more than 10 people, panic and start to get my head messed up

[astonsmummy]

Hiya astonsmummy, I just wanted to say that you can get there hun, I know exactly how you feel at the moment, going through the same thing myself, been really low for a few weeks and it all just seems to be mounting up until you erupt. My OH has to keep me in check because I start taking things out on the kids, which I did earlier, my oldest just topped off a bad day for me so I ended up smacking my youngest for the most trivial thing which made me feel even worse, and hate myself even more.
Can't you email your mum to tell her how you feel and that you do appreciate her, I find things easier to put into writing to explain how I feel than to actually talk to someone. I'm sure the last thing she would want is for you to feel so alone and down that you would think of hurting yourself or putting your little one into care.
If you ever need anyone to talk to you can PM me anytime, I tune into this site nearly every night, I haven't got a miracle cure (god knows I could do with one myself) but if it helps you can cry on my shoulder. Thinking of you.

Thnx hun, you ave bought a tear to my eye :o
My mum knows how i feel but she's got alot of her own stuff t deal with i dont thing she can handle me anymore.
Thought i might feel better today - but then last night put stop to that, its pathetic rally, i've seen this bloke a few times and thought he actually liked me, most blokes i meet just want one thing. But no - he just wants to be friends, i'm destined to be single forever! - I know life isint about having a fella but i'm soooooooo lonely its untrue.
I just wanna be loved:o

[Mrs A.]

hi folks a worried and depressed mrs a here again,
i have a dilemma regarding my forthcomming appointment with the psychiatrist:~
do i
be honest with work and tell them why i need time off
apply for an annual leave day and say nothing
or try and swap my shift and say i have something else on
or or say i have a hospital appointment but not tell them why
and advice greatly received
regards
mrs a

[astonsmummy]

tell them u have a hospital appointment, you dont have to tell them why if you dont want to xx

[rose07]

hi mrs a

i would prob be honest but you dont have to go into detail, just say you have a hospital appointment and if they ask why just say you would prefer not say till you know more.

or if there is someone at work to who you might confide in and talk with then you would have someone to help and understand you at work?

hope this helps and all goes ok with your appointment.

BIG HUGS to ya

[rizla01]

Hi To all of you.

Just spent an hour skipping through this forum and one thing comes out of it above all else.

There doesn't seem to be any 'Measure' of depression does there?

I.e. I know that I have 20/10 vision. Others have better and others have worse eyesight but depression is depression the world over - but alas, it isn't!

I believe this to be one of the factors affecting a lot of you/us. I have had many severe problems in my life. Had the anti-depressants and (FOR ME) Am glad to be rid of but DONT envy me that.

You may need them, whereas others just use them. A temporary measure only. Used to get you back to the norm so that you can return to work, start doing the things that you have lost confidence in doing and in general, get your life back together.

I feel that others among you will NEVER be independant of pills. You have a natural imbalance and not necessarily one brought on by bad experiences. Hereditory problems in all probablity.

Trouble is, if you tell yourself that it's hereditory then you may be convincing yourself that there is no cure and that may not be the case. On the other hand, youi might convince yourself that this is just a passing phase (Again!) and that you should try to come off medication.

I think that this is the main problem with depression.

Everyone get's depressed from time to time but this, too, is oft confused with the illness called Depression. For those people 'snap out of it' can work but it's no less than an insult to the real sufferers among us.

Learn how to handle it is the key and you all seem to be doing a fantastic job from what I read.

Truly I suffer/ed depression for 5 years or so but when I read some of the tales on this forum I count my blessings.

BTW. Nobody mentions dry mouth and taste problems when on anti-depressants tho.:) something I always suffered from. Perhaps you just get accustomed to it.

The very wise Ted Hutchinson touched on Excercise but few seem to have noted it's great benifits. I does work. Sign up to the gym for three months (Payment in advance so that you will be committed) and you will thrive enormously. Plus you will often meet others in the same boat.

I was on Seroxat incidentally.(20MG daily if I recall correctly).

Part of my probs was a marital breakup and since I met my partner I have been on a very healthy diet so perhaps that has helped too.

I still cant hold down a good job (Haven't tried actually - lack the confidence and cant handle the responsibility - least I don't think I could - sound familiar?:) )

Lastly, (Sorry to go on) I also beleive that the cause of a lot of our problems is too high expectations of ourselves and not loving ourselves enough.

we are led to believe that we can and should acheive great goals and that to have a flash car/house/job is the norm. Peddle back a little. To hell with it. drive an old banger. Sweep roads if neccessary and rent. No-one will think any worse of you. no-one that matters anyway.

I think society in general needs to let out some steam and take the pressure off. Whether it to be slim, attractive, rich or whatever. To hell with it...........YOU are still a lovely person. Know that!!

Chill!

[mclaren]

I feel that others among you will NEVER be independant of pills.

I think society in general needs to let out some steam and take the pressure off. Whether it to be slim, attractive, rich or whatever. To hell with it...........YOU are still a lovely person. Know that!!

Chill!
i am supposed to be on tabs but i have tried to stop and not take them cos i hate people thinking im not able to do anything. hasnt worked as much yet - cos ive been to the edge a couple of times.

as for society - im not slim, im not attractive and im not rich - im not a lovely person - if i was a lovely person, i wouldnt be cursed with auburn hair, wouldnt be as fat as i am and wouldnt be as ugly as the front of the porsche cayene. lol.

thats my opinion.

[Mrs A.]

hi rizla and thanks for your post regarding this statement you said

I still cant hold down a good job (Haven't tried actually - lack the confidence and cant handle the responsibility - least I don't think I could - sound familiar? )

how on earth do you manage financially if you dont work dont get me wrong im not judging you i am just wondering as i feel work could play a big part in my depression
regards
a very nosy mrs a

[Just Looking]

I get depressed occasionaly, when I do I find it helps if I don't come onto MSE. I always seem to focus on the subjects that makes one even more depressed and end up in a rather bad mood. At present I'm in a non-depressed state and can cope with everything.

[razorbladekisses]

Just came back to look over this thread. How is everyone doing?

[mclaren]

Just came back to look over this thread. How is everyone doing?
im fine - just talking to a nice person on msn :) :p

[PIGZ]

Thnx hun, you ave bought a tear to my eye :o
My mum knows how i feel but she's got alot of her own stuff t deal with i dont thing she can handle me anymore.
Thought i might feel better today - but then last night put stop to that, its pathetic rally, i've seen this bloke a few times and thought he actually liked me, most blokes i meet just want one thing. But no - he just wants to be friends, i'm destined to be single forever! - I know life isint about having a fella but i'm soooooooo lonely its untrue.
I just wanna be loved:o

Hiya astonsmummy, hope you are feeling better today, have you made it up with your mum yet?
Does your bloke just want to be friends for the time being and see what happens or is he a non-starter altogether?
I think we all need someone in our lives, someone who can just be there for us without judging us, to give us a cuddle when we're down and to laugh with us when we're up. Isn't there a saying somewhere that if you learn to love yourself then other people will love you too? Well in my opinion thats a load of balony, I think we all deserved to be loved no matter who or what we are and what we think of ourselves. And if this bloke can't do that for you then he's not worth having around anyway. Everyone's got a Mr or Mrs right out there somewhere and yours will turn up when you least expect it.
But looking on the bright side, at least you haven't got to pick up his dirty socks and put up with his snoring:) . All blokes want one thing but some are just better at making it less obvious than others! :rolleyes2.
Hows the terrible twos going with your DS? My youngest DS at 3 has got to the tantrum and ignoring stage, oldest at 10 has reached the I think I'm a teenager and can do what I want when I want stage and DD at 7 is in Israel at the mo having retail therapy with her nan. I'm sure I'll never get the hang of this motherhood lark.
Chin up hun you're not alone:A

[mclaren]

I've been on Paroxetine for nearly 2 weeks now. Tbh I've not felt any better by taking it. I mean I know that they aren't the happy pills that some people refer to them as but I did expect to feel a little better. Lately I've been getting awful headaches lasting a few days and also horrible dreams. I don't know if it's a side-effect of the medication, the depression itself or something completed unrelated.

I just can't be bothered with life. I just want to hide away and be left alone.
i know how you feel - i was on those tabs but they didnt work well with me - so doc gave me trazadone. seem to work a bit. headahces were one of the side efeects i had.

as for not being bothered with life - how i felt, still do sumtimes tbh - but i take each day as it comes, and i try to have somthing planned for the next day so i know what i can look forward to.

you aint alone though :)

[DjSatansfury]

I've just been put on Trazadone after fighting with depression and anxiety over the last year.

My advice to you with the tablet is:

a) Make sure you take them
b) Take them for at least one month
c) If they have any adverse effects see a doctor ASAP. When i was first diagnosed, i was put on Fluxotine (Prozac) and they made me x2 as worse, bringing me to the brink of suicide.

d) If you feel so-so, then leave for another 2 weeks - 1 month. If you dont feel like the meds are working, then consult your doctor about a change.

I right this in hindsight, and wish i'd knew this myself a year down the road. I've been taking Citalopram for nearly a year, and its had !!!!!! all effect. So dont do what i did, and just leave it!

[rizla01]

i am supposed to be on tabs but i have tried to stop and not take them cos i hate people thinking im not able to do anything. hasnt worked as much yet - cos ive been to the edge a couple of times.

as for society - im not slim, im not attractive and im not rich - im not a lovely person - if i was a lovely person, i wouldnt be cursed with auburn hair, wouldnt be as fat as i am and wouldnt be as ugly as the front of the porsche cayene. lol.

thats my opinion.


Blimey Mclaren.

http://www.germancarfans.com/spyphotos/6050804.001/6050804.001.1M.jpg

THAT bad?

Hi Mrs A.

I don't have the confidence to work for someone else therefore for the last ten years I have worked for myself.

No-one else to moan off, no- expectations and I don't have to put up with a***holes. Also I earn what I want and when I feel like it and if life has been a bit unkind then I take time out.

A luxury, I realise, but for me a necessity.

[astonsmummy]

Hiya astonsmummy, hope you are feeling better today, have you made it up with your mum yet?
Does your bloke just want to be friends for the time being and see what happens or is he a non-starter altogether?
I think we all need someone in our lives, someone who can just be there for us without judging us, to give us a cuddle when we're down and to laugh with us when we're up. Isn't there a saying somewhere that if you learn to love yourself then other people will love you too? Well in my opinion thats a load of balony, I think we all deserved to be loved no matter who or what we are and what we think of ourselves. And if this bloke can't do that for you then he's not worth having around anyway. Everyone's got a Mr or Mrs right out there somewhere and yours will turn up when you least expect it.
But looking on the bright side, at least you haven't got to pick up his dirty socks and put up with his snoring:) . All blokes want one thing but some are just better at making it less obvious than others! :rolleyes2.
Hows the terrible twos going with your DS? My youngest DS at 3 has got to the tantrum and ignoring stage, oldest at 10 has reached the I think I'm a teenager and can do what I want when I want stage and DD at 7 is in Israel at the mo having retail therapy with her nan. I'm sure I'll never get the hang of this motherhood lark.
Chin up hun you're not alone:A

Heya PIGZ,
I'm a bit better today, been a bit tearful but nothing major.
I sorted things out with my mum yesterday, she's cool bless her.
I dunno what this bloke wants, probably just friends, every bloke i meet always says 'i'm not ready for a relationship' i think they r just embarrassed to be seen with me to be honest.:confused:
I have such pants luck with men! There is this bloke who i met last year, who quite frankly is starting to make me think i'm insane!
He text me last night (early hours) asking if i wanted to go to brighton for the day on tues, and he's really sorry for being a u know wat to me, basically he's done this about 4 times - then he never texts back.
The thing is he's not a nastyh person or a jack the lad - quite the opposite - very shy, he only seems to txt me when he's drunk and admitted its because he is shy, i should just tell him to pee off but i just cant, gosh i sound well desperate! :eek:
I think thats my problem, i'm too soft and let blokes take me for a ride.

Well it's my birthday on wednesday so i'm gonna try cheer myself up think i'll go to brighton with spud (DS). Although i have a strange feeling my mum has something planned.

I've just had a thought, every year around my bday i get like this - i'm not scared of getting older though:confused:

[mclaren]

Blimey Mclaren.

http://www.germancarfans.com/spyphotos/6050804.001/6050804.001.1M.jpg

THAT bad?

yes :D lol

[PIGZ]

Hiya astonsmummy, glad you're feeling a bit better.
In my experience most blokes are never ready for a relationship, even the ones that are in one!!! and how can you say that they are embarrassed to be seen with you? Surely they're all scared off because they know that they are not good enough for you!!!!!
Try telling this bloke that you won't put up with this bull any longer and he's on his last warning, that should make him sit up and take notice and stop treating you like a doormat then let him take you to brighton for the day and let him pay, that should give you a nice day out and save money!
If he runs a mile, try taking on the attitude of 'I don't need a man in my life', all men love a challenge and if you stop looking they'll come chasing, then play them for a while, it might not lead to a long lasting relationship, but at least it will give you back some self confidence.
I'm the same with birthdays I'll be 31 this month and even though I don't worry about getting older what hits me is that another year has gone by and I haven't achieved anything in it. But I have promised myself that by the time i'm 40 I'll have had a tattoo and learnt to ride a motorbike, that should give me enough time to get over the fact that I'm petrified of pain blood and needles and that I've been driving a car for the last 13 years and I'm still rubbish on 4 wheels so heaven help everyone if I attempt it with only 2.
Whats Brighton like these days anyway I haven't been there since I was a kid and we lived in ashtead, surrey. Funny enough my OH looked at going there this weekend because we wanted to take the kids to a beach with a funfair but weren't sure if it had one so ended up in Barry Island today instead.

[astonsmummy]

Hiya piz,
Well i text him and had no reply so sod him! it's his loss!!
Thank you so much - your replys have really give me a kick up the bum - i havent had anyone to talk to, my best friend is in cyprus, coming back tommorrow though yay!
And i dont really have any other 'good' friends that i feel i can confide in as most of them are younger and havent got kids or been through much. Or i havent known them long - i know i could say the same about posting on here as i dont know anyone but it just seems easier - especially when you read other people pouring their hearts out, i honestly thought i was the onlyh one who felt so down!
I've got the tattoo's but u'd never catch me on a motor bike - u wouldnt even catch me on a push bike! havent got a clue!
The main goal in my life is to become a midwife - but at the moment, as my mum keeps telling me i need to concentrate on sorting myself out.
Thnx for taking the time to reply xx
To be honest, i havent been to brighton sea front since i was about 16! And i only live 20 mins away! i know it has a pebble beach and funfair thought (ell it did last time i looked!) Definately gonna go this week!
Thnx again xx

[rose07]

hi all

just checking in on the thread to see how you all are?

and sending lots a love and hugs to all that are having very bad days today.

:D

[PIGZ]

Hiya astonsmummy
Good on you for kicking him into touch, you're worth more than that!!!
Glad I could help and if you ever need someone to talk I'm always around.
Have a great time in brighton and have a great birthday.
Loves and hugs to you XXX

[urban spirit]

Good evening everyone, how are you feeling??? Just to let you know someone is thinking of you, and sending you hugs.


Hi Rizla01, how are you?


we are led to believe that we can and should acheive great goals and that to have a flash car/house/job is the norm. Peddle back a little. To hell with it. drive an old banger. Sweep roads if neccessary and rent. No-one will think any worse of you. no-one that matters anyway.

I think society in general needs to let out some steam and take the pressure off. Whether it to be slim, attractive, rich or whatever. To hell with it...........YOU are still a lovely person. Know that!!

Chill!
For me, I dont buy in to what society tells me I should be/have/want/think, I am a free-thinker and I please myself.http://img.moneysavingexpert.com/icons/icon14.gif
I am very chilled but that doesnt stop things in my brain making me feel the way I do. Not conforming to what 'the norm' is makes me happy (relatively speaking)!:)
I read somewhere that depression is supposed to be suppressed aggression - ????

(ironically i'm not a happy bunny tonight)

[Chrismojam]

Only just came across this post (was looking for something else but this is far more important).......

Just wanted to send big hugs to everyone....I do hope you are feeling better/or whatever you are doing to tackle depression is working...........

I took Seroxat from about June/July 2001 to the December of that year.....

Bear in mind.....I hate taking meds for anything (especially Psych problems).....before anyone gets annoyed there is a reason for this.....my mum is bi-polar (manic depressive) and has been since before I was born (about 1970)....she has to take meds now...because they are given to her...but she still thinks there's nothing wrong with her and she doesn't need them...and with the deviousness that is mental illness..if she can work her way out of taking them she will.....

Now I generally don't like taking meds anyway...of any kind..........with psych meds I suppose I kind of thought if I take them I'm giving in....I'm obviously of the stiff upper lip type...no matter what the costs!

Well I didn't get any kind of help for years.....put myself down for counselling a couple of times......but of course by the time it's 'your turn' you feel ok..........and cancel.......only took meds after I broke down in work.........work/mum/crappy life stress all came to a head in the boss's office:o admittedly this was after I had got into a right nark and stormed out of the bosses office (that was work related...I wanted 2 days off...........woopeydoo! because I had been doing the work of 3 people and was absolutely knackered...and she wouldn't let me) (she did me a favour actually.........I applied for another job while I was off the following week ...took a weeks annual leave...still wouldn't take sick!.....as I was thinking of jacking it in anyway, nothing to lose.........got the job......that's another story..)

Anyway I thought enough was enough.....swallow your pride and get help.....

I personally found the meds did'nt help.....I am sure they have helped others but they din't help me.........probably due to not REALLY wanting to take them anyway.........

I found when I tried to cut down I became seriously jittery and out of sorts.....just didn't feel right (tried this from about the October....)....however, I had my mum stay with me for the Christmas.....I was seriously stressed by this and by the time she had gone home, I realised that I hadn't taken the meds for 2/3 weeks and hadn't felt the jittery feelings.....obviously felty !!!! because I was stressed about everything else...but I was off the meds...and I decided not to go back on them...

They work for some.......not for others...........never feel embarrassed if you are taking them.......or if you feel you are at the end of your tether..they may work for you.......give them a go if you feel that's your only option....

Me... I am yet to feel what it is to 'feel alive'...those with depression will know what I mean by that....it will happen one day.......but meds for me is not the way.......just have to figure out what is...:rolleyes:

[PIGZ]

Hiya all, hope everyone is feeling ok today.

Hiya astonsmummy, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, did you have a good day? Hope the last few days have been brighter for you.

[astonsmummy]

Hiya pigz,
Thank you, yeah i've had nice day.
Feeling alot better!! Hope ur ok xx

[PIGZ]

Glad to hear you're feeling better.
I'm not too bad at the mo, woke up really evil this morning, went to work but just couldn't concentrate on anything so came home and blitzed my house, I find it always helps when I go on a cleaning mission, so I've chilled out a bit now hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. xx

[Loubee]

Yep, I've suffered on and off for about 13 years (since I was 16).

First treated when I was 21, with Prozac. that seemed to help (despite some odd side effects) and i was fine for 7 years until November 2004. I didn't seek help until August 2005, when i went to the GPs. I was put on Citalopram. After the side effects wore off after 2-3 weeks, I began to feel a lot better. I went to see a counseller for 6 months, which was wonderful as well. Speaking to some one you are not emotionally involved with is very liberating. I think a lot of my problems (or whatever) are from I never like to talk about things, because I am scared of upsetting or offending people around me, even if they have hurt me-i was too scared to say anything. So I'd get angry and upset and take it out on myself. which fits in with what urban spirit was saying about depression being supressed aggression.

I am now being taken off the Citalopram (very gradually-you can get re bound depression if you just suddenly stop taking them) and am having some withdrawal things (insomnia and fatigue) , but on the whole I am feeling optimistic about the future. I just hope i remain aware enough to seek help before it gets bad if the depression comes back ( I was self harming last time). The tablets help me through bad times. Without them I certainly wouldn't have felt well enough to go to counselling etc.

I hope everyone is having an OK day *hugs to all*

[rose07]

hi all

hpe you are all ok today??

love and hugs xxx

[Mrs A.]

hi everyone,
just back from the gp for my review, not been feeling any better so she put my paroxitine up to 30mg daily and she said the psychiatrist may change my medication when i have my appointment with him on the 22nd (the mere thought of going to see him terrifies me if im honest).
does anyone know of how you can get time off of work for depression and what benefits if any i could get as i am just not coping well at work and every day i am waiting to make a huge mistake.
does anyone out there know how im feeling
regards
mrs a

[skier1066]

Hi Mrs A,

We have a confidential Employee services section where we can discuss issue like this and indeed I found my companies one very useful when I was going through a hard time and suffering from depression.

I guess its different for everyone, but I found it helped to be at work - I told a few close friends why I was like I was, but for me it helped to be busy - even if I did have to get up to walk out side to cry or to talk a wee walk cause I wasn;t coping. I also let my line manager know the situation and they were quite helpful. Maybe I was lucky, I suspect I was.

If you can;t work then a visit to your doctor to get a sick line would seem to be appropriate, its an illness after all.

Reading through this thread its clear to see you are not alone and that alot of people feel very similiar. I suffered for just under 2 years with depression but I'm definately on the mend now - my family , a good counsillor and some pills to get me through the first year - helped me. It all takes time and unfortunately some of the things will be different for you.

I wish you all the very best and keep talking about it, it does help

Skier1066

[Tiff]

hi everyone,
just back from the gp for my review, not been feeling any better so she put my paroxitine up to 30mg daily and she said the psychiatrist may change my medication when i have my appointment with him on the 22nd (the mere thought of going to see him terrifies me if im honest).
does anyone know of how you can get time off of work for depression and what benefits if any i could get as i am just not coping well at work and every day i am waiting to make a huge mistake.
does anyone out there know how im feeling
regards
mrs a

Don't be terrified of the psychiatrist angel - he's on your side. There are no cattle prods & I haven't met an axe murderer at the clinic yet. There isn't anything that they won't have already heard! I'm not saying it's easy to talk about hard times - it isn't - but you will get there.
I think you can claim Incapacity Benefit or Income Support if you have under 16s. I've been unable to work since 1998 and because of the problems I have, as well as physical ones, I'm able to claim Disability Living Allowance.
they do have a section on the form for mental ill health. You should get an application form from DWP & then book an appointment with either DIAL or CAB to help you fill it in - they're really helpful & non-judgemental.
The first steps are always the most daunting but when you see that they understand you, it's a wonderful feeling and worth the effort.
The trouble with depression is that you feel separated from the world & that no-one could ever understand what you're going through - we all feel like that. So you're not alone angel. Remember 1 in 4 adults suffers from it. You must remember you're ill, NOT mad!
I'm thinking of you & will read up on your progress.
Best Love,
Tiff x

[rose07]

hi everyone,
just back from the gp for my review, not been feeling any better so she put my paroxitine up to 30mg daily and she said the psychiatrist may change my medication when i have my appointment with him on the 22nd (the mere thought of going to see him terrifies me if im honest).
does anyone know of how you can get time off of work for depression and what benefits if any i could get as i am just not coping well at work and every day i am waiting to make a huge mistake.
does anyone out there know how im feeling
regards
mrs a

hi mrs a

soz you not feeling better.

dont worry about going to see your psychiatrist, we are all here to help you and you can chat anytime. also he/she only wants to help you, everything is confidential unless you at risk to others or yourself and it will be ok, and if at any point you dont feel ok, tell him, they have techniques for people, i was terrified when i went to see mine, ended up hyperventilating, did breatheing exercises and felt a little better than we had a chat and felt more better, doesnt solve everything but helps.

also want to say well done for getting to see a psychiatrist i found it very hard to face up to what i was feeling, so well done in taking the steps to making sure you are ok and having support around you, x

and yes i do undeerstand how your feeling, i dont know what advice to give about work as not sure where you work and what benefits would be on offer, might be worth asking if you are unsure?? i think if work isnt helping you at the moment then maybe you need to ask for time off??
did you manage to tell anyone how you are??

pm anytime if you need a chat.

(((((BIG HUGS)))))
xxxxxx

[astonsmummy]

Hi everyone, hope all is well.
Well after a kick up the bum from PIGZ and ppl, it all came crashing down yesterday....
Ended up in hosp last night after taking some sleeping pills and antidepressants - didnt do any damage luckily.
Dont really know why i did it - thought it wouldnt be as painful as drivivng my car into the lampost which looked really inviting on the way home - anyway went to hospital and was let out this morning after seeing a wonderful psyciatrist - he was so easy to talk to and understanding and has changed my view completely.
Then today i had a visit from the community CPN and she was good too, my case will be discussed tommorrow at the docs meeting and then they can decide whats best for me.
Been signed off work for a month - probably get the sack as i only started on july 1st.
Social servises rang my mum and said they will want to speak to me - thats all i need! I hope they dont try to take DS as that would kill me.
God i'm in such a mess!
Am definately gonna go for counciling ASAP and just see what other help i can get.
Anyways, hope everyone else is ok xx

[williamo]

hi everyone,
just back from the gp for my review, not been feeling any better so she put my paroxitine up to 30mg daily and she said the psychiatrist may change my medication when i have my appointment with him on the 22nd (the mere thought of going to see him terrifies me if im honest).
does anyone know of how you can get time off of work for depression and what benefits if any i could get as i am just not coping well at work and every day i am waiting to make a huge mistake.
does anyone out there know how im feeling
regards
mrs a

Yes I have an idea of how you are feeling, I came out of a relationship about a month ago and ever since become depressed. I was actually feeling so low I couldn't face going back to work and was off on sick pay for a good few weeks before finally packing my job in. I goto my GP every one or two weeks and I have to take anti depressants fluxotine each day. I never ever thought I would ever suffer from depression beofre this happened becasue at the time my life was going so well then suddenly wham I lose everything in my life and its such a shock more than anything and never thought it would happen at the age of 23. Looking back I maybe regret leaving my job and not keeping myself busy, because simply being at home depressed is not good for you, and should be keeping your mind occupied. If you do pack your job in make sure you have somthing to keep you busy during the day is my advice otherwise you will get more and more down. In terms of sick pay as long as you keep sending in your doctors notes to your work you should be ok. I haven't seen a psychiatrist yet and personally just find talking to my GP or to my family usefull at the moment, don't panic about going in to talk, its amazing how much better you feel after talking about things to people. I hope you get better soon and I really do feel for you at this time and if you or anyone else wants to talk or chat feel free to send me a message as its easier sometimes for people experiencing similar things to talk and understand eachother. Take care.:beer:

[Turning_into_scrooge]

Hi everyone, hope all is well.
Well after a kick up the bum from PIGZ and ppl, it all came crashing down yesterday....
Ended up in hosp last night after taking some sleeping pills and antidepressants - didnt do any damage luckily.
Dont really know why i did it - thought it wouldnt be as painful as drivivng my car into the lampost which looked really inviting on the way home - anyway went to hospital and was let out this morning after seeing a wonderful psyciatrist - he was so easy to talk to and understanding and has changed my view completely.
Then today i had a visit from the community CPN and she was good too, my case will be discussed tommorrow at the docs meeting and then they can decide whats best for me.
Been signed off work for a month - probably get the sack as i only started on july 1st.
Social servises rang my mum and said they will want to speak to me - thats all i need! I hope they dont try to take DS as that would kill me.
God i'm in such a mess!
Am definately gonna go for counciling ASAP and just see what other help i can get.
Anyways, hope everyone else is ok xx

Try not to worry these days they try to keep families together, they more than likely want to offer you more help with the little one:)

[Turning_into_scrooge]

I had a review with my doctor about 2 weeks ago. My main problem is I just cannot get any sleep, partly due to fibromyalgia and partly due tpo depression anyway he increased my dothiepin from 75mg a day to 150mg which i take both together at night and at last i can sleep so feeling much better, been a long haul.

[abbecer]

Would like to send you a big hug Aston's Mummy. I truly do know how you are feeling. Ending it is so appealing when you can't see away out. Please stick with it and listen to all the advice. It won't be today, it might not be tomorrow but hang on in there it will get better. You will look back on it and not be able to believe that that was really you.

Believe me it WILL get better. I've been there i know.

Rebecca x

[needmoney]

http://www.wishingtree.com.sg/images/MD0603.jpg
Sending Best Wishes to all of you and hoping you feel better today.
Never, never, never give up.
- Winston Churchill

Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Dreams are renewable. No matter what our age or condition, there are still untapped possibilities within us and new beauty waiting to be born.
- Dr. Dale Turner

[skippie]

i've joined the club, have been given Zopiclone to help me sleep at night.

Only problem being is that the prescription is £6.75 for four tablets, which i can't really afford .

[astonsmummy]

i've joined the club, have been given Zopiclone to help me sleep at night.

Only problem being is that the prescription is £6.75 for four tablets, which i can't really afford .

That s what i had they do work but its only a quick fix and they give an awful taste. (i'm not allowed anymore tho)

[Mrs A.]

hiya people,
am i turning the corner at last?
today whilst out browsing in the shops i caught sight of myself in a mirror and i honestly could't believe the state i looked, ill fitting and maybe not quite clean clothes and hair that looked like it hadn't seen a brush in days, yellow teeth, spots and shoes that could have walked away by themselves. i was horrified to think that i had been going about like that for months on end and i swiftly nipped into Asda and bought a couple of new outfits and a pair of shoes, got changed in the car in the car park!!!!!!! nipped to superdrug for a brush, facial wipes, hairspray and deoderant not to mention chewing gum, i gave myself a quick brush up in the car and i felt a load better when i went into the next shop looking for a mirror and i actually looked quite decent. only trouble is my wardrobe needs a complete overhaul.
so am i getting better or am i simply more cheery and aware because i have has a week off of work???????
regards
mrs a

[cattie]

i've joined the club, have been given Zopiclone to help me sleep at night.

Only problem being is that the prescription is £6.75 for four tablets, which i can't really afford .

Why don't you try asking your gp to prescribe you a few more & explain how much the prescription is costing you. If you tell your gp you will only take them when you really have to, then you may have more success. Many gp's don't like to prescribe these for longer than 28 days anyway.

Failing that, if you are on anti-depressants ask about the possibility of changing to one that is a combined sedative to help you sleep at night.

[Turning_into_scrooge]

hiya people,
am i turning the corner at last?
today whilst out browsing in the shops i caught sight of myself in a mirror and i honestly could't believe the state i looked, ill fitting and maybe not quite clean clothes and hair that looked like it hadn't seen a brush in days, yellow teeth, spots and shoes that could have walked away by themselves. i was horrified to think that i had been going about like that for months on end and i swiftly nipped into Asda and bought a couple of new outfits and a pair of shoes, got changed in the car in the car park!!!!!!! nipped to superdrug for a brush, facial wipes, hairspray and deoderant not to mention chewing gum, i gave myself a quick brush up in the car and i felt a load better when i went into the next shop looking for a mirror and i actually looked quite decent. only trouble is my wardrobe needs a complete overhaul.
so am i getting better or am i simply more cheery and aware because i have has a week off of work???????
regards
mrs a

Thats really good news, sounds like you re turning a corner :T If the job youare doing is not helping how about changing career paths? i'm sorry i haven't read all the thread as ther is soooo much to read. Anyway if youcan afford it would your doctor not give you sick notes because then you could maybe go to college and learn a skill that would benefit you healthwise more? Its just another angle to look at :)

[williamo]

Hope everyone is feeling ok today!! I'm having probelms getting up in the morning and waking up in the afternoon anyone have any advice even my alarm clock doesn't get me up!! the only medication I am on is fluxotine - prozac and I take 2 a day (think its spelt like that). I do find that they are helping me though and keeping me more focused.

[**purpleprincess**]

Didn't know this thread was here :o if I did I would have posted a long time ago probably. I've got depression and went to pick up my script of fluoxetine (prozac) today, so ironic that I find this thread today. Been depressed for a number of years, 8 years or more now, only just started on the ADs on 1st January 2006. This was to be my year for change and positive change at that. Still on the ADs but with my GP hope to come off them early next year ....................... bit of a waffle that but mostly wanted to say hello! :hello: and happy that I'm not alone :o

[williamo]

Didn't know this thread was here :o if I did I would have posted a long time ago probably. I've got depression and went to pick up my script of fluoxetine (prozac) today, so ironic that I find this thread today. Been depressed for a number of years, 8 years or more now, only just started on the ADs on 1st January 2006. This was to be my year for change and positive change at that. Still on the ADs but with my GP hope to come off them early next year ....................... bit of a waffle that but mostly wanted to say hello! :hello: and happy that I'm not alone :o

Definately not alone! I only started on these fluoxetine things a few weeks ago and definately are helping me cope with my situation, hopefully like you, my GP said I just have these as a temporary measure until I get back on track. Take care! :beer:

[**purpleprincess**]

Definately not alone! I only started on these fluoxetine things a few weeks ago and definately are helping me cope with my situation, hopefully like you, my GP said I just have these as a temporary measure until I get back on track. Take care! :beer:
Thanks williamo. Hope you didn't have too bad a time with any side effects and glad that they are helping you :)

[williamo]

Thanks williamo. Hope you didn't have too bad a time with any side effects and glad that they are helping you :)

Do they have side effects? I thought i can just effect you when you drive. I hope i dont get any bad effects from them.

[rubytuesday]

Try not to worry these days they try to keep families together, they more than likely want to offer you more help with the little one:)

Yes that is true. Have been ill three times now myself. They will try and support you in that regard. Do you have any friends and family who could offer support too.Wishing you well

[Tiff]

i've joined the club, have been given Zopiclone to help me sleep at night.

Only problem being is that the prescription is £6.75 for four tablets, which i can't really afford .

Here I go stating the obvious, but some benefits will allow you to get it free but also you can get an exemption certificate from GP I think or I think
also you may be able to get it free if it's going to be a life-long very necessary medication again via GP.
Sorry I can't be more definite x

[**purpleprincess**]

Do they have side effects? I thought i can just effect you when you drive. I hope i dont get any bad effects from them.

Not necessarily, I just know that you can get side effects for the first two weeks til it gets into your system. I did and other people I know did but it doesn't affect everyone.

Don't worry, didn't mean to panic you!!:o

[williamo]

Not necessarily, I just know that you can get side effects for the first two weeks til it gets into your system. I did and other people I know did but it doesn't affect everyone.

Don't worry, didn't mean to panic you!!:o

Thanks was a bit worried luckilly no I had no side effects yet!! :)

[Turning_into_scrooge]

Hope everyone is feeling ok today!! I'm having probelms getting up in the morning and waking up in the afternoon anyone have any advice even my alarm clock doesn't get me up!! the only medication I am on is fluxotine - prozac and I take 2 a day (think its spelt like that). I do find that they are helping me though and keeping me more focused.

Ask your doctor if you can take both tablets together at bedtime, if you're taking 1 in the morning and 1 at night they may be doping you up through the day, thats why i take both mine at night but i'm not on the same meds as you mine are Dothiepin now called Dosulepin we have to use the American name now.

[postingalwaysposting]

hello everyone http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/bubblefizz/emoticons/wave2.gif i have only just found this thread, please forgive me :o i have only just been diagnosed as depressed only early september and its hard, the docs wont give me tablets, they think that i can sort myself out without tablets even when i explained i tried to kill myself they didnt bat an eyelid :rolleyes: i have good days and bad days (bet you all do too) as its all new to me i am trying to find ways to cope but its hard..... i just wanted to say hi to you all really http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/bubblefizz/emoticons/wave2.gif

[**purpleprincess**]

hello everyone http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/bubblefizz/emoticons/wave2.gif i have only just found this thread, please forgive me :o i have only just been diagnosed as depressed only early september and its hard, the docs wont give me tablets, they think that i can sort myself out without tablets even when i explained i tried to kill myself they didnt bat an eyelid :rolleyes: i have good days and bad days (bet you all do too) as its all new to me i am trying to find ways to cope but its hard..... i just wanted to say hi to you all really http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/bubblefizz/emoticons/wave2.gif
:wave: hello posting!!

[mcdonag]

hello everyone http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/bubblefizz/emoticons/wave2.gif i have only just found this thread, please forgive me :o i have only just been diagnosed as depressed only early september and its hard, the docs wont give me tablets, they think that i can sort myself out without tablets even when i explained i tried to kill myself they didnt bat an eyelid :rolleyes: i have good days and bad days (bet you all do too) as its all new to me i am trying to find ways to cope but its hard..... i just wanted to say hi to you all really http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/bubblefizz/emoticons/wave2.gif

Go see another doctor immediately, second opinion, anything, but please don't try to kill yourself anymore.

When I get these thoughts, I have an elastic band on my wrist, and I give it a pull and let it sting my wrist. It soon takes away my thoughts of death and self harm.

Try it, it really works.

Professional help is better though.

[razorbladekisses]

I thought I was getting better but I'm not. My Doctor has increased my Seroxat dose from 20 mg to 30 mg daily. I just feel so pathetic and useless.

[mcdonag]

I thought I was getting better but I'm not. My Doctor has increased my Seroxat dose from 20 mg to 30 mg daily. I just feel so pathetic and useless.

Thats exactly why he has increased your dosage. Sometimes the medication can make you feel better, if you can get the right one for you that is.

You are getting better, but slowly. The medication can give you a false sense of security.

Stick with it you'll get there eventually, but be prepared for knockbacks, they will happen all the time. The tablets, in time, will help you to cope with these knockbacks and you can then start to live a normal life. You can then be weaned off the medication and get used to coping without it eventually.

If you don't mind, is it ok if I pray for you tonight?

[Mrs A.]

hi folks,
well i guess i havent turned the corner at all!!!
im feeling right royally depressed this morning i guess i am on my way back down again.
got to go to work later on today which definatley doesnt help when i see the psychiatrist next week im definately gonna tell him that i am not fit to work, exhausted all the time, got no energy, cant concentrate on anything which makes me a liability seeing as how i work as a nurse.
ah well the highs and lows of this illness
regards
mrs a

[rubytuesday]

Just a word of caution. As I have already mentioned a few times I have had post peurperal psychosis twice and then a couple of years ago after 12 years with no problems became ill with affective disorder, manic type illness followed by depression. I am sure this was induced by valium and coproximal which I was prescribed for back pain. Any way last week I took Diclofenic for my pain and started to feel very peculiar and stopped taking it and now feel fine. This has also happened to me with St Johns Wort so I think it is worth bearing in mind.

[razorbladekisses]

Thank you for your support mcdonag I appreciate it. Sometimes I really do think it would be so much easier just to give up :|

Mrs. A Sorry to hear that you are having a bad day :grouphug:

[xlesleyann]

Hi

Ive been suffering depression on and off for 9 years.

Been signed off work for the last 8 months with depression. I also suffered panic attacks and agorophobia. I have been on Citalopram for months now and after the side effects wore off I find they have helped me.

I also went to see a Pyschologist to help with panic and agorophobia. It has also helped loads.

I am due to go back to work soon but have been applying for toher jobs as I want a fresh start. Have passed interviews with the police and have to go to a medical tomorrow.

If anyone told me a few months ago i would feel better I wouldnt have believed them. I couldnt see how life was going to get any better. I too couldnt sleep at night then slept all day. Had no interest in housework or my physical appearance.

rather than focusing on getting better all at once I took tiny steps day by day e.g putting make up on or doing my hair. Going round to my local shop on my own was a huge hurdle but I persisted and I can now go to the local supermarket on my own. I still have a long way to go but have come a long way.

Anyone who is in the same position, keep your chin up, it does get easier.

[love lifer]

Have you had your thyroid checked? an underactive one can cause depression and tiredness, amongst other things.

I got depressed 3 years ago- crap relationship and job were the main causes. i had some conselling, 6 months prozac and changed the job and dumped the partner. things got better.

i would recommend the counselling in particular- sometimes you need help sorting your head out from someone who is objective

good luck

[mcdonag]

Thank you for your support mcdonag I appreciate it. Sometimes I really do think it would be so much easier just to give up :|

Mrs. A Sorry to hear that you are having a bad day :grouphug:


Remember, if you kill yourself. Someone somewhere has got to find you. Who will that be?

Someone you love? Total stranger walking his dog? Little girl playing?

Who ever finds you will have to live with the picture of your lifeless face for the rest of their lives.

What if no one finds you for weeks? Your actions to get away from your problems will only pass on another problem to someone else.

What about you? No one will be able to see your smile ever again.

You are so helpful to so many people on this site just by sending the odd message. The fact that you are still alive today after your last post, is such an inspiration to ME. Surely thats worth staying alive for?

Keep in touch.

[PIGZ]

Hiya astonsmummy,

Sorry I've only just caught up on the posts.

How are you feeling now? Please please please don't try that again, you need to be around for your son, I know that sometimes you might think he'd be better off without you but honestly he needs his mum.

How did it go with the docs and social services?

The last thing you need to worry about is getting the sack, you need to concentrate on getting better.

Like I said before PM or email me anytime, and if you want my number to have someone to talk to just say, I might not be able to do much from here but a problem shared is a problem halved as they say.

Take care hun, things can only get better xx

[Tiff]

I thought I was getting better but I'm not. My Doctor has increased my Seroxat dose from 20 mg to 30 mg daily. I just feel so pathetic and useless.

Hi angel, the doctor has noted that you're not feeling better and has given you an increase in your meds. This may only be a temporary step if you're going thru a worse time than usual and maybe need a little extra help for a few months. As soon as he sees or you say you're feeling better, maybe they'll decrease it again.
The way you're feeling shows that you need a little extra help. that's not pathetic or useless - that's smart!;)
It is an up and down road with depression. No shortcuts. Just try and remember the up times and know that they'll be back.
Much love. x

[Tiff]

rubytuesday
Regular MoneySaver



Join Date: Jul 2005
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Just a word of caution. As I have already mentioned a few times I have had post peurperal psychosis twice and then a couple of years ago after 12 years with no problems became ill with affective disorder, manic type illness followed by depression. I am sure this was induced by valium and coproximal which I was prescribed for back pain. Any way last week I took Diclofenic for my pain and started to feel very peculiar and stopped taking it and now feel fine. This has also happened to me with St Johns Wort so I think it is worth bearing in mind.


- Morning angel. PLEASE be super careful when taking drugs and starting new ones whatever they are. You should always remind your GP by saying 'will it be ok to take these with the medications I'm already on? Will there be any side effects?' Or check with your chemist. Just this little thing may save you a lot of grief later.
You do have to be careful with 'natural' medicines (eg St.John's Wort) as we forget that they are actually the basis of some medicines and can react to what you're already taking. Best wishes.

[Tiff]

Hi Purpleprincess - WELCOME! :)

[Tiff]

Good morning everyone. :)
Sorry for all the posts guys - catching up with you all. Also mcdonag, I'm sorry if I echoed your advice above or below.

[Tiff]

hi folks,
well i guess i havent turned the corner at all!!!
im feeling right royally depressed this morning i guess i am on my way back down again.
got to go to work later on today which definatley doesnt help when i see the psychiatrist next week im definately gonna tell him that i am not fit to work, exhausted all the time, got no energy, cant concentrate on anything which makes me a liability seeing as how i work as a nurse.
ah well the highs and lows of this illness
regards
mrs a

Morning mrs a - hang in there angel - the positive thing is that you are recognizing what is happening to you - we have to remember that the highs will come back because nothing stays the same.
Big hugs

[Tiff]

hello everyone http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/bubblefizz/emoticons/wave2.gif i have only just found this thread, please forgive me :o i have only just been diagnosed as depressed only early september and its hard, the docs wont give me tablets, they think that i can sort myself out without tablets even when i explained i tried to kill myself they didnt bat an eyelid :rolleyes: i have good days and bad days (bet you all do too) as its all new to me i am trying to find ways to cope but its hard..... i just wanted to say hi to you all really http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/bubblefizz/emoticons/wave2.gif

Hi posting :)
This must all be very new and overwhelming for you but hang in there. As for attempted suicide, please go back & get a 2nd & 3rd opinion.
Through reading all the threads here you'll pick up ideas from posters and some may work for you too.
Sometimes, tablets aren't the answer for a particular problem and maybe psycholgy will help you more. Stay in touch regularly with your doctor and tell him exactly how you feel. A step at a time angel.;)
Sorry if I've echoed other posters.

[Tiff]

Good for you xlesleyann! :T
Thanks for taking the time to post such a positive response!
You seem to have really managed your illness - which is where we all want to be. Sometimes you have to stop the illness from managing you.
Best wishes for the future angel x

[Tiff]

Remember, if you kill yourself. Someone somewhere has got to find you. Who will that be?

Someone you love? Total stranger walking his dog? Little girl playing?

Who ever finds you will have to live with the picture of your lifeless face for the rest of their lives.

What if no one finds you for weeks? Your actions to get away from your problems will only pass on another problem to someone else.

What about you? No one will be able to see your smile ever again.

You are so helpful to so many people on this site just by sending the odd message. The fact that you are still alive today after your last post, is such an inspiration to ME. Surely thats worth staying alive for?

Keep in touch.

I so agree with mcdonag!:T There's so much to consider when you try to plan a suicide: it involves so many others. For anyone considering suicide...

How? - the awful thing is that you can become seriously ill through a suicide attempt. It'd be truly tragic if you were in that temporary desperate zone, tried it and survived and ended up very disabled.

When? - Never the right time! How do you know who might drop in? By trying a suicide attempt, successful or not, you are going to leave someone who finds you with that distress for the rest of their lives. Many people will become involved and affected. Please don't do that to them. They'd much rather want to get you more help than make your funeral arrangements - please give them that chance.

Why? - I know it's hard & I don't mean to preach to you. You have every right, even a duty, to stay alive and find your role in life and in other people's lives! Not one of us wants to feel like this, but you have to remember, it does pass. Bless you, you don't know what could possibly be ahead of you angel - it could be something wonderful.

I'm sure you could shout out a whole list of reasons for suicide and probably feel that you can't take any more. I don't doubt this. You have to recognise that you are ill and that there is treatment and that sadly, there are no quick fixes but you can get through it. Remember you are not the only one who has ever felt like this and that no matter what happens, you have the right to live.
Be proud that you're posting on here because by doing that, consciously or sub-consciously, you want someone to understand, you want help and you are still trying to survive. I'm proud of you! Please call out for help when you need it angel.
Big hugs to everyone.x

[rose07]

hi folks,
well i guess i havent turned the corner at all!!!
im feeling right royally depressed this morning i guess i am on my way back down again.
got to go to work later on today which definatley doesnt help when i see the psychiatrist next week im definately gonna tell him that i am not fit to work, exhausted all the time, got no energy, cant concentrate on anything which makes me a liability seeing as how i work as a nurse.
ah well the highs and lows of this illness
regards
mrs a

hi mrs a and everyone,

think i understand how your feeling,

i thought i was on my way up too, but today i just feel soo ****. i have had depression for a while now, and everytime i have picked myself up something knocks me down again.
but one thing i keep remembering when im down is things will get better, as even though i get soo down i could just give up, i dont, i push myself and give myself challenges to keep myself going.

i have seen councellors/psychiatrists etc. . . . for the last 4 years on and off, and even though it helps it does not completely get rid off all the negativity.
i am not on anything for my depression as i am kinda against tablets. think what you will of that as tablets can help some people but found they were just not for me.

to any of those thinking about suicide, please do not do it, no matter how bad things are, do something before it gets to that stage. i have tried it on numerous occasions mainly by od. and the amount of people that get involved is mad, psychiatrists, friends families, if you do something like that it doesnt just have an effect on you but everyone that loves you and cares about you, and everyone who is feeling alone and down and like you are by yourself, you are not there are people that want to help you and care for you, even if you dont feel it yourself.
and if nothing else mse is here.

i had a relapse 2 months ago, went a bit mad and nearly died and since then have turned a bit of a corner, ok so im not great but i would never od again or do anything like that and even though i still have alot of negativity going on, i lost an awful lot through my depression and the way i was it had such an effect on my life and the people around me.

now i am trying to get on and move on. but it is soo hard like a constant battle with myself all the time, but there are things that keep me going through the day and giving me the strength to carry on.

to mrs a, and everyone, hang on, and hold on to the positive things,
i am sure you are all great and strong people and you need to battle it and control it and not let it control you, i found out what happens when i let it do that for 4 years. . . .

ok, so i hope you dont mind me sharing my story, was wondering whether to post it or not, but its always good to get these things out.

remember you are not alone and that we are all here

(((((((((((((((((((BIG HUGS))))))))))))))))) to all

xxxx

[bettyboop61]

Oh Rose,
Thankyou sooo much for your post, I too have hit a very low spot again and I know I shouldn't but have been contemplating suicide again, but your post has given me the strength to carry on a bit more and see how things pan out. I don't post on here often as I'm tooo low to make the effort but your post somehow hit a cord with me. Hello and hugs to all my fellow sufferers out there.

[Tiff]

Oh Rose,
Thankyou sooo much for your post, I too have hit a very low spot again and I know I shouldn't but have been contemplating suicide again, but your post has given me the strength to carry on a bit more and see how things pan out. I don't post on here often as I'm tooo low to make the effort but your post somehow hit a cord with me. Hello and hugs to all my fellow sufferers out there.

Hi Bettyboop,
Well done you on posting. :T
It's a great site and people care & understand. Try & post some more posts when you can - it's great for letting off steam.
Please don't consider suicide angel. You did so well to change your mind due to someone else's post - that show's you are in control!:T You are too valuable to do this, no matter how you're feeling.
I think this post shows just how much difference our posts can make.
Big hugs to all. x

[xlesleyann]

I think this is a great post in the fact you can put down how you really feel without being worried about getting judged by others. I know it is hard to sometimes open up and be honest to close ones about your true feelings.

I went through loads of days when all I thought about was taking my own life to stop the feelings and this upset my fiance when i spoke to him about it.

So to have others that can share your experiences and give you words of confidence to get you through each day is great.

My heart goes out to anyone suffering depression as it is not a nice feeling but as Tiff said you have to get in control of it and stop it being in control of you. It is a long process but you will get there.

I will keep posting here, I am sure I will have a few more bad days yet to come but there does come a point when you have more good days than bad days.

Please noone give up, life is too precious.

xxx

[rose07]

Oh Rose,
Thankyou sooo much for your post, I too have hit a very low spot again and I know I shouldn't but have been contemplating suicide again, but your post has given me the strength to carry on a bit more and see how things pan out. I don't post on here often as I'm tooo low to make the effort but your post somehow hit a cord with me. Hello and hugs to all my fellow sufferers out there.

totally agree with you tiff.

hi bettyboop, im glad my story has helped you and struck a cord with you.
i know how hard it can be not wanting to get out of bed and feeling like each day is a struggle and constant battle.

but if your feeling down you can always come on mse and post how you are feeling.
and you can pm anytime if you just need to chat.

depression is such a powerful thing it can take over your life, but as long as you make sure your the one in control and not the illness then you can be stronger a little each day. the main thing is to take each day at a time, even each hour and just try and keep yourself occupied with things you love and not things that get you down.

((((((((((((((((BIG HUGS))))))))))))

xxx

[bettyboop61]

Thankyou so much rose and tiff for your support, I'm still here to battle another day, so that must be something I guess, Have been trawling the internet for some help and ideas and came across this place, I am considering contacting them as I am sooo desperate. It is a place called Maytree a sanctuary for the suicidal, it is a non medical respite centre for those of us that our desperate and at the end of our tethers, you can be referred by your own medics or they do accept self referrals, you can stay there for 4 nights. Have a look at maytree@maytree.org.co.uk . Thankyou again for everyones support.... I desperately feel for everyone one of you that post on here and all of you that read this post and feel unable to post yourself.
Hugs to everyone

[Tiff]

:rolleyes: Thankyou so much rose and tiff for your support, I'm still here to battle another day, so that must be something I guess, Have been trawling the internet for some help and ideas and came across this place, I am considering contacting them as I am sooo desperate. It is a place called Maytree a sanctuary for the suicidal, it is a non medical respite centre for those of us that our desperate and at the end of our tethers, you can be referred by your own medics or they do accept self referrals, you can stay there for 4 nights. Have a look at maytree@maytree.org.co.uk . Thankyou again for everyones support.... I desperately feel for everyone one of you that post on here and all of you that read this post and feel unable to post yourself.
Hugs to everyone

hi angel - you are so very welcome - you must be feeling a little better to have been able to have tried to help yourself by looking up resources. Well done you!:T
I'll check out the link after I've finished my mail.

It's amazing how your priorities change when you suffer from mental ill health. You know you're on the right track when you start to really prioritise & get rid of all the cr*p in your life & suddenly realise you've been like a hamster on a wheel until that point. We're so busy managing and coping we don't see the things we should be doing/enjoying and that we let all the fun go, replacing it with responsibilities. Really simple things can be enjoyed.

I've made myself a little 1st Aid Kit in a pretty box for when things are too hard and I disappear into my room. Take a nice cup of tea too. Only one rule : nothing negative/depressing/sad /sharp and no alcohol allowed! - well if I can't drink, why should you?!:D

Ingredients as follows:
- biggest bar of chocolate you can find (er...until I became allergic to dairy products 4 years ago!:cry: )

- cat or dog -do not keep in box as you will be arrested:naughty: ...(er...until I became allergic to them 5 years ago and had to rehome!:cry: :cry: )

- a cold smooth glossy stone (not to be used in conjunction with windows or other people!:eek: )

-a tape or cd of your favourite music to soothe you (only usable when 16 year old DS is out of the house - hardly ever - and doesn't have tv, music, & phone going at the same time both upstairs and down!_pale_ )

- photos of your favourite things/people/places (but not if they're the reason you're depressed!:rolleyes: )...(or if afore-mentioned DS has used your digital camera & deleted your pictures before you could print them!:mad: )

- your 1st Barry Manilow album (it'll either kill you or cure you!:rotfl: )...(yet another of my dreams that never came true!:drool: :cry: :cry: :cry: )

-textures like a feather (preferably off the bird!;) ), (er...until I became allergic to feathers 3 years ago:confused: )...

I just reviewed my happy box... kinda empty...

AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M ON MEDICATION!!!!!:rotfl:

S*d it, grab a chinese takeaway (and yes, I'm allergic to that too!), a bottle, as much chocolate as you can find, any man under 60 without his own labrador and stick, and I'll be round in an hour!_party_ :cool:

Seriously, (oh do we have to?:rolleyes: )The idea of a happy box is to make you feel special/ comforted when you need it most and I think the next thing I'll be putting in mine, is some of these wonderful posts.
Thinking of you all -much love
Tiff x

[bettyboop61]

Sorry I think the proper link for May tree is www.maytree.org.uk and tiff you have made me smile tonight...you have a sense of humor, i must get mine back, somehow it went missing,
Thinking of you all tonight as I won't be sleeping!!
Betty

[rose07]

hi tiff and bettyboop

oh tiff you made me laugh there with the box idea, great idea, just a shame you allergic to it all.

my mum is doing my head in at the mo, given me orders and shouting she is a mad one, :mad:

how are you feeling today bettyboop??

not having a job is getting me down, im just a struggling artist at the mo.

the place you have researched looks good, do you know when you will be going there, may i firstly say well done in taking the steps to making sure you get the help you need i found it soo hard to do this, but well done you :A

(((((((((((BIG HUGS)))))))))) to you all

xxx

[tigertiger]

Hi all dont know if this site has been mentioned in any other post but its very good.

.http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/lounge/default.asp?sectionid=0.

[CarolnMalky]

Evening everyone,
I have been reading this post for the first time, and as a fellow depression sufferer I am overwhelmed.
I was finally diagnosed last July, after having a nervous breakdown in a DWP medical, and again at my own GP.I was prescribed Flouxetine(Prozac) and rest etc.
At this point, my parents turned their back on me and disowned me...asked if I had caught the depression from my hubby? Or if I had caught it whilst on holiday...the funny bit is they are both on anti-depressants.
Anyways...Over a year later now...still having bad days, IBS flares up, attending Gyn due to absence of periods etc.
Our fabulous NHS is pulling all psychiatric practise nurses out of GP practices, and its an 11 month waiting list to see a pyschologist!joy eh!
But hey, tears are all part of the healing process, my hubby thanks god he has waterproof skin lol!
This website is a great "distraction" for me, I cant go out on my own due to panic attacks etc, and if Im worried and anxious I come on here and have a wee wander through the forums, save money and get freebies at the same time.
Thanks everyone for reading this, and its good to know you guys are here!
xxx Carol xxx

[Tiff]

Sorry I think the proper link for May tree is www.maytree.org.uk and tiff you have made me smile tonight...you have a sense of humor, i must get mine back, somehow it went missing,
Thinking of you all tonight as I won't be sleeping!!
Betty

Hi bettyboop - what do you mean "sense of humour" - this is my life!:confused:
I think it just pops in and out (don't start!:o ) - sometimes I think it's a distraction from what's been going on. There's nothing like a perky depressive to hack people off!;)
Glad I brought you a smile anyway. I don't think I'll be sleeping much tonight as my DS gets his GCSE results tomorrow.
Look after yourself angel. :grouphug:

[Tiff]

hi tiff and bettyboop

oh tiff you made me laugh there with the box idea, great idea, just a shame you allergic to it all.

my mum is doing my head in at the mo, given me orders and shouting she is a mad one, :mad:

how are you feeling today bettyboop??

not having a job is getting me down, im just a struggling artist at the mo.

the place you have researched looks good, do you know when you will be going there, may i firstly say well done in taking the steps to making sure you get the help you need i found it soo hard to do this, but well done you :A

(((((((((((BIG HUGS)))))))))) to you all

xxx

Hi Rose - hope you're ok angel. Isn't that what mothers are meant to do? ;) You always say that you'll never be like that with your own child.
But trust me, childbirth results in brain damage and a sense of humour bypass often follows!:rolleyes: You wait and see!:rolleyes:
I wish you well in your job hunt. Struggling artists always seem to get a happy ending angel. I've thought about writing but you generally don't become rich and famous until about 30 years after you died!!!:D
I've noticed that it's usually sensitive and creative people that end up with depression and that's what's so frustrating because you know what's wrong & you can't make your body fix it.
I always felt ashamed of saying and having depression - people often can't relate to it and come back with the old 'come on - get a grip' attitude after a while, or they just don't come back.
I tried an experiment by telling people that I hadn't seen for a long time and who said I looked unwell, that I had a chemical imbalance in the brain ( nothing to do with me being blonde by the way!) - which is a common description for depression - and the immediate concern and caring was incredible. I hope that people will one day recognise just how common it is and that the stigma will go. The illness itself is hard enough to deal with as it is. Hang in there folks x

[Tiff]

Hi all dont know if this site has been mentioned in any other post but its very good.

.http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/lounge/default.asp?sectionid=0.

Thanks tigertiger - I'll look at this site. :)
Loving the sheep!!! :)
Best wishes, Tiff

[Tiff]

Welcome on board Carol! Thanks for sharing. I could relate to most of what you said (won't bore you with my bits ;) )It's a hard road & this thread has been amazing because it's shown me I'm not travelling alone. Take care.

[rose07]

hi everyone

how are you doing tiff and bettyboop?

thanks for sharing your story carol x

and welcome tiger


thanks tiff, i am sure all mums arent like my mum, she doesnt treat me as though i am an adult she is very abusive and controlling and i think this contributes to my health alot.
i have a job, wooo hooo, nothing permanent, just some part time work freelancing as a camera person, but it is something and means i can keep doing what i love instead of doing a job i hate.
yeah im a very sensitive and creative person, just didnt realise it, lol.
yeah know what you mean tiff people always say, arrhh get over it but if only they realised its not that easy its not a snap ya fingers there ya go thing, it takes time and alot of strength.

love and hugs to everyone
stay strong and you wil get there
xxx

[Tiff]

hi everyone

how are you doing tiff and bettyboop?
thanks for sharing your story carol x
and welcome tiger

thanks tiff, i am sure all mums arent like my mum, she doesnt treat me as though i am an adult she is very abusive and controlling and i think this contributes to my health alot.
i have a job, wooo hooo, nothing permanent, just some part time work freelancing as a camera person, but it is something and means i can keep doing what i love instead of doing a job i hate.
yeah im a very sensitive and creative person, just didnt realise it, lol.
yeah know what you mean tiff people always say, arrhh get over it but if only they realised its not that easy its not a snap ya fingers there ya go thing, it takes time and alot of strength.
love and hugs to everyone
stay strong and you wil get there
xxx

Morning Rose, Morning Everyone, :)
I'm sorry to hear things aren't good at home Rose.
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR JOB!!!:T
It must be fantastic to do a job you're passionate about. And hey, it's something else to go on your CV right? Another step on the ladder.;)
Whenever I have to explain that I have depression to someone, you can almost see them looking for the nearest exit!:rolleyes:
I tell them it's okay, that I've never met an axe murderer and that I am allowed to handle sharp objects!!!:rotfl: But I do have to say there are an amazing amount of good guys out there too.:T
I'm hoping everyone is okay. Thinking of all of you.
Much love. x

[rose07]

Morning Rose, Morning Everyone, :)
I'm sorry to hear things aren't good at home Rose.
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR JOB!!!:T
It must be fantastic to do a job you're passionate about. And hey, it's something else to go on your CV right? Another step on the ladder.;)
Whenever I have to explain that I have depression to someone, you can almost see them looking for the nearest exit!:rolleyes:
I tell them it's okay, that I've never met an axe murderer and that I am allowed to handle sharp objects!!!:rotfl: But I do have to say there are an amazing amount of good guys out there too.:T
I'm hoping everyone is okay. Thinking of all of you.
Much love. x


hi tiff
how ya doing?

yeah home is very stressful at the moment. esp when i have just finished uni and feel like i should be out there seeing the world, as it were. but have noo money to do that.
yeah its good to have the job, but it is only contracted, and not permanat, but def something i can put on the cv, yey.
i am feeling quite bad tonight, hence the lateness, lol, i find it soo hard to sleep at the moment. and because my job is an on off thing i am soo bored at the moment, its soo hard but me a strong little thing, lol. feel like im in circles at the mo, but hope things will get a bit better soon.
i know tiff its like as soon as you say depression, people dont know what to say, they think your going mad or something, and its not like that at all, it is an illness that is both hard to overcome and a battle whilst going through it.
(((((((((((((((BIG HUGS))))))))))))) to everyone
xxxxx

[muffin502]

Hi to everyone who has posted on this thread. I have had clinical depression for about 21 years - I will do a separate post on my experience on another thread as this is just a quick one!

I have had to have a lot of time off work due to my depression. My job is quite stressful and I have to deal with the public which can be very difficult when you just want to stay in bed and not see a soul. To make matters worst my employer does not pay me when I am off - I only get SSP - wow that really helps pay the mortgage. Has anyone else had this experience with their employers? They have told me I am only entitled to 20 days paid sick leave and once this entitlement has been used, they do not pay you. I have never come across this with any other company before and I have worked for them for nearly 5 years. So, as well as being off for an illness I did not ask for, I have added financial worries which certainly do not help my mental state. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

[beachbeth]

I have depression and first realised it in 1994 when a doctor told me. I couldn't believe it because Im such a smiley, happy person. I thought all my stomach aches/flu/headaches etc were symptoms of some virus. There were days when I couldn't leave the house, answer the phone or the door. People who don't suffer just can't understand this. The only way I can describe it is that its similar to when you have the flu and your body feels to heavy to do anything.

I have been on and off anti-depressants, the first one being quite a strong one which made me feel a bit spaced out (can't remember the name). Although these tablets weren't ideal, they took the awful feeling of dread away and I felt as though the sun had come out for the first time in months!

I managed to stop taking it and felt like normal again for a while, only for my depression to hit again. I always know when its coming on because I get up in the morning and, even if Ive only got one thing to do the whole day, I feel as though I am never going to be able to do it and my sense of humour goes too!

Three things keep me on an even keel at the moment (although I have my bad days still) and they are:

1. Not having to work. My husband earns a decent wage and I get Incapacity Benefit (you are entitled to this if you've been working for 10 years and have been paying National Insurance)
2. Having dogs. They relax me and are happy to join me in a walk or a nap or whatever else Im doing and don't judge me.
3. Seroxat. Everytime I try to come off them (im on 20mg a day) I just sink back into tearfulness and feeling as though I can't cope. So now I just take them and don't even think about stopping.

My mum is a very difficult person to deal with and my hubbie is convinced she is the cause of my depression. She is very critical and I could never do right for doing wrong most of the time. His theory is that, if you researched enough into depression, you would find that it is caused by whoever brought you up, whether it is mum, dad or grandparent and Im inclined to agree.

[Tiff]

Hi to everyone who has posted on this thread. I have had clinical depression for about 21 years - I will do a separate post on my experience on another thread as this is just a quick one!

I have had to have a lot of time off work due to my depression. My job is quite stressful and I have to deal with the public which can be very difficult when you just want to stay in bed and not see a soul. To make matters worst my employer does not pay me when I am off - I only get SSP - wow that really helps pay the mortgage. Has anyone else had this experience with their employers? They have told me I am only entitled to 20 days paid sick leave and once this entitlement has been used, they do not pay you. I have never come across this with any other company before and I have worked for them for nearly 5 years. So, as well as being off for an illness I did not ask for, I have added financial worries which certainly do not help my mental state. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Hi Muffin - sorry to hear how stressed out you are angel - it's understandable and if it's any help, some of us posters here have been in your shoes. SSP is all you'll get I believe BUT I am amazed that you have not applied for DLA with you having clinical depression for 21 years?
Mental ill health is classified under Disability Living Allowance and as long as you've been ill for 6+ months and it's likely to be long term, and it's certainly stopping you from working 'normally'. As you say, the stress doesn't help your illness. I think you should apply. If you do Call 08457 123456 (Disability Living Allowance Office) and ask for a claim pack to be sent to you.
- The form is long and daunting and you should either see CAB or DIAL to help you fill it in because they are experienced in using the coorect wording.
- The forms they send you will be dated - the whole process (writing to your GP etc) can take 3-4 months & if granted DLA, it will be backdated to the date on their forms.
- There are 2 parts - care & mobility.
I hope this has been helpful to someone.
Best wishes

[CarolnMalky]

Morning everyone...hope everyone is feeling ok today.
I see a common theme here in that most of our mothers are controlling and abusive and generally not very understanding...my hubby is convinced my mum is the cause of my state of health.
Wee update, was at the gyn yesterday and Ive to go back in February, they took bloods yesterday, so will have to wait and see what happens.But me being me is worried sick, tearful, sleep pattern is non existent, and IBS is playing up big time.
I was in receipt of DLA low rate mobility(wow) and the DWP in their infinite wisdom have decided I no longer need it, that I can go our on my own, despite not having done so for 18 months...needless to say appeal is in and I will update here!
Rose congrats on your job! hope all goes well.
Tiff you are a source of useful information, thanks for all the advice.
Hope everyone has a dreadfree, tear free day!
Love n hugs
Carol xx

[Mrs A.]

hello all
not posted for a while, couldnt be bothered if im honest, cant seem to be bothered doing very much these days to be honest, lost my sex drive, get up and go etc. i guess im on a real downer just now. not having suicidal thoughts at least i dont think i am but i have noticed im not wearing my seat belt these days if i crash the car i crash and might die i dont seem to care if im honest.
went to the psychiatrist he wants me to have cognitive behavioural therapy once a week........ dunno how i feel about that could be difficult with work who still dont know what wrong with me i have decided i definately dont want them to know.
my eating habits have went out the window i am binging on sweets, crisps, cakes...... and have gained over 5lbs this week alone.
i keep having these what my family call unrealistic thoughts and ideas this week i want to give up work and study beauty therapy. not that i could afford to.
im just about managing to get to work everyday and perform when i get there but im just so exhausted and just live for my days off.
mrs a

[muffin502]

Hi Muffin - sorry to hear how stressed out you are angel - it's understandable and if it's any help, some of us posters here have been in your shoes. SSP is all you'll get I believe BUT I am amazed that you have not applied for DLA with you having clinical depression for 21 years?
Mental ill health is classified under Disability Living Allowance and as long as you've been ill for 6+ months and it's likely to be long term, and it's certainly stopping you from working 'normally'. As you say, the stress doesn't help your illness. I think you should apply. If you do Call 08457 123456 (Disability Living Allowance Office) and ask for a claim pack to be sent to you.
- The form is long and daunting and you should either see CAB or DIAL to help you fill it in because they are experienced in using the coorect wording.
- The forms they send you will be dated - the whole process (writing to your GP etc) can take 3-4 months & if granted DLA, it will be backdated to the date on their forms.
- There are 2 parts - care & mobility.
I hope this has been helpful to someone.
Best wishes


Hi Tiff

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply.

I have never heard of DLA - is this not just for unemployed persons and not those who are employed and do receive some salary when they are at work?

:confused:

[rose07]

hi all

how are you today?

im going to be quick as not really ok, i have hit a bit of a rock recently, just have a constant feeling of feeling awful.
i too mrs bear have not been bothered to wear a seat belt not bothered to look across the road, not bothered if the knife slips, BUT and this is a big but, we are all still here so we must have the strength in some way.
constant battle in me at the mo, didnt even know how i got here at this moment but know i will get there if i battle it and stay strong.
carol i think your right my mum def seems to stress me out which means being at home at the mo isnt helping.
though she goes back to work next week and my job should be starting soon, soo hopefully wont have to see her much.
tiff how are you doing??
muffin502 i had to quit my old job, it became soo stressful and hard enviroment to work in that i had to give it up or end myself in serious trouble, i hope it works out ok for you??
hi bb, yeah i understand what you mean i am a happy kinda person always seem to make the people around me happy but not myself???

hope everyone is fighting the battle
love and hugs to you all
xxx

[bettyboop61]

morning tiff, rose,mrs A
I'm in that place myself rose and mrs A, I too never wear my sit belt etc, just cannot be bothered with anything at the mo. I am comfort eating as well, have piled on the pounds not that I'm really that bothered about it. I guess i'm in the lucky position in that I don't go out to work, I don't think I could hold a job down anyway, and I really admire those of you who do go out to work, it must take some guts and sheer determination to get up and go out the door every day, I take my hat off to you.
How are you bearing up Tiff?
Muffin I claim DLA have done so since my depression started.
At the moment I am sooo stressed out with my daughter who by the way is 22, she decided she wanted to leave home, so she did, got a flat and a new job and I was so pleased for her, because she too suffers with depression and I know how hard it was for her, but then 6 months down the line she walked out of her job, that was a month ago now, she has hit rock bottom, has no job, no money coming in, her rent is due, I have been helping her out with money for food etc, she wants to go bck to college full time, but how realistic is that when she has to support herself, I have given her all the support I can and that is no mean feat considering how I am feeling at the mo, but I feel I cannot give anymore, I went to the job centre with her, got her to ring up for benefit forms, which she has filled in and still hasn't posted bk, I have to prompt her all the time. Oh i could go on forever!!
I too have problems with my parents, so much so that I cut them out of life 6 years ago and haven't spoken to them since, whether that is a good thing or a bad thing only time will tell, but at the mo I think it is a good thing. My mother was overbearing and generally down right nasty. And my children don't miss there grandparents and they weren't much cop at being grandparents anyway. Anyway I've rambled on enough.... think I will go bk to bed now.

love to everyone
betty

[Tiff]

Hi Tiff

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply.

I have never heard of DLA - is this not just for unemployed persons and not those who are employed and do receive some salary when they are at work?

:confused:


Hi Muffin :)
Disability Living Allowance is totally independant of means tested benefits.
It only considers your health and how your day to day life is affected.
You can work fulltime and still qualify.
If you are already on benefits, and you are awarded whatever level of DLA, it is not included as an income so you would still get housing/council tax benefits and any other benefit you're on. Your benefits would not be affected.
DLA is meant to help you maintain an independant life where possible. The lower rates aren't a huge amount but every little helps when you're that ill.
Hope this was helpful. :)

[Tiff]

Hi Rose, Hi Everyone,
I had an idea (yes I know I promised not to do it again! :) ) which may help with your freelance photography.
My DS is about to go to college to study Performing Arts. There is a huge gap in the market for photographers who don't charge an arm, a leg and a kidney, to do head shots, black & whites etc for their CVs & portfolios. Most colleges have a Performing Arts section so you could approach their department & ask if you could put a notice up & offer a discount.
The important thing is that in this field their photographs need updating regularly because they change their hair colour/length & their looks change as they grow more etc and casting directors etc get highly ticked off when they're looking through the photos looking for a blonde and ending up with a redhead! You could also maybe advertise near a college in local shop windows so students will see for themselves.
Hope you're well & that you don't think I've totally lost the plot - I'm just missing a few pages! ;)

[muffin502]

Hi Muffin :)
Disability Living Allowance is totally independant of means tested benefits.
It only considers your health and how your day to day life is affected.
You can work fulltime and still qualify.
If you are already on benefits, and you are awarded whatever level of DLA, it is not included as an income so you would still get housing/council tax benefits and any other benefit you're on. Your benefits would not be affected.
DLA is meant to help you maintain an independant life where possible. The lower rates aren't a huge amount but every little helps when you're that ill.
Hope this was helpful. :)

Hi Tiff
thanks so much for your help and info. I have just been online to the gov website and filled in a claim form. Nothing to lose so fingers crossed I get a bit of something. Will keep you posted. Have a nice day! Muffin

[pug_in_a_bed]

Hello

Just wondering does anyone know if you can continue taking the pill whilst taking antidepressants such as prozac, just asking for my friend who is considering taking ad's but like me is plagued with acne and dianette is the only thing that works for us! I know we can't give medical advice but if anyone can provide a link or something with the answer I would be grateful.

Thanks again
Pug

[bettyboop61]

Hello pug

Don't know if this helps any, but my daughter takes venlafaxine and she takes dianette along side it, I'm almost sure you can take the pill along side anti depressants, but of course its better to be sure. I'm sure someone will be along who knows for sure.
Betty

[jellycat40]

Hi just found this thread.

I have suffered with depression on and off for 22 years. However have been on antidepressants for 6 years this time round. I have also been having analytical counselling since January this year. This is long term counselling and some of the people in the group have been there for 6/7 years. I was determined to be well after a year but things are not panning out.

I wanted to come of Cipramil and see what happened, I have weaned off them over the last few months and was feeling optimistic - however the withdrawal is awful. I have been off them for 3 weeks and had hoped to feel better by now. Went to see GP today who said that 6-8 weeks was normal for withdrawal and she gave me some diazepam 3 times a day to counteract the withdrawal. She also said that it may be that I will have to have life long antidepressants! Not cipramil but something else. Not sure what yet she will talk to my psych team and they will talk to me to discuss what next. I am booked for some physiotherapy to learn techniques to manage the panic that I get with the depression and the therapy that I have should sort out some of the reasons for the depression but apparently the depression itself may never completely go away.

I feel gutted, I really felt that I was going to get better and now I feel like I have no hope.

I do not work at the mo, I haven't worked for about a year now, I haven't applied for any benefits as I am sure that as hubby works I will get nothing. So I have no money of my own, Child benefit and tax credit aside. That goes on bills!

Feel zonked with the first lot of diazepam taken today, 3 times a day will have me a walking zombie but it may be better than the electric shock feelings, headaches and joint pain that I have been getting.

She has also referred me for bloods and urine check just incase a miracle has happened and I suddenly have thyroid or something. I think I was just checked a few weeks ago though!!!!

Louise

[Tiff]

Hello

Just wondering does anyone know if you can continue taking the pill whilst taking antidepressants such as prozac, just asking for my friend who is considering taking ad's but like me is plagued with acne and dianette is the only thing that works for us! I know we can't give medical advice but if anyone can provide a link or something with the answer I would be grateful.

Thanks again
Pug

Hi Everyone,
Have no idea angel...but I know a man that does!;)
All you have to do is call any pharmacist/chemist, tell them everything you're taking and about whether they think there would be a problem taking this drug in addition. Chemists (in Asda etc.) very available. Also always ask 2 or 3 so you can have a good overview of their responses. If they all say something different, see your GP. Not worth taking any risks either way.
Always better to check with GP (by telephone appointment if you have those?).
Much Love

[Tiff]

Hi just found this thread.

I have suffered with depression on and off for 22 years. However have been on antidepressants for 6 years this time round. I have also been having analytical counselling since January this year. This is long term counselling and some of the people in the group have been there for 6/7 years. I was determined to be well after a year but things are not panning out.

I wanted to come of Cipramil and see what happened, I have weaned off them over the last few months and was feeling optimistic - however the withdrawal is awful. I have been off them for 3 weeks and had hoped to feel better by now. Went to see GP today who said that 6-8 weeks was normal for withdrawal and she gave me some diazepam 3 times a day to counteract the withdrawal. She also said that it may be that I will have to have life long antidepressants! Not cipramil but something else. Not sure what yet she will talk to my psych team and they will talk to me to discuss what next. I am booked for some physiotherapy to learn techniques to manage the panic that I get with the depression and the therapy that I have should sort out some of the reasons for the depression but apparently the depression itself may never completely go away.

I feel gutted, I really felt that I was going to get better and now I feel like I have no hope.

I do not work at the mo, I haven't worked for about a year now, I haven't applied for any benefits as I am sure that as hubby works I will get nothing. So I have no money of my own, Child benefit and tax credit aside. That goes on bills!

Feel zonked with the first lot of diazepam taken today, 3 times a day will have me a walking zombie but it may be better than the electric shock feelings, headaches and joint pain that I have been getting.

She has also referred me for bloods and urine check just incase a miracle has happened and I suddenly have thyroid or something. I think I was just checked a few weeks ago though!!!!

Louise

Hi Louise - come on in , the water's lovely!;)
Straight away apply for DLA as soon as possible. I posted the phone number and all the details within the last couple of days. It is awarded in order to help you live independantly - your husband could be a full time worker, and it is not included in any other benefits you can get - child benefit, tax credits, income support. Make an appointment with DIAL or CAB to help you fill it out. The wording is crucial & they are experts & will improve your chances of getting an award in either care or mobility units or both. The forms are long & repetitive but that's so they can get an overall picture of the difficultites you face.

Hun, on a personal note, living with depression comes in stages. You're not promised a cure but you expect one desperately. You want to be in someone else's life, be anywhere else, have any other illness except the one you have.
Try anything to make it go away.
There are different kinds of depression and each person is unique & so is their treatment. Accepting that is a battle. I just wanted to shout"You know what's wrong with me - cure it!" And when you hear that you are most likely going to have this for the rest of your life, it's a cold hard smack in the face because you've been trying so hard, gone through so much just to get better and you feel it's all been for nothing.
You're still here after 22 years - so like it or not, you're a survivor.:T Well done you! I can't promise you everything will be all right as no-one with or without depression is guaranteed that. The trick is to be kind to yourself and to take hold of that damned depression and control it - don't let it control you! And I know it's not that easy but that's your goal - to manage your illness. There are tips galore from the wonderful posters on this thread far more knowledgable than me, that show it can be done. And you will find what works for you.
After all this time, I'm sure you know there are ups and downs and when you're in a down, cling on for dear life to the fact that if you can go down you will go up again! Write it on your mirror in lipstick, stick a note to the fridge - anything just to remind you that everything changes, that this low won't last forever.
As for the Diazepam, it can help and as your body gets used to it, the zonked out feeling goes away.
When you're feeling low as you are now, be brave again and post on this thread.
And every one of us feels so much better when we hear someone ask, "Going my way?" because there are lots of us on this journey and you're never alone.:grouphug:
Best wishes. Sorry for the length of the post guys x

[dorry]

hi jellycat, :wave:,

i work with teenagers and many of them have depression, there are alot of theraputic interventions that can be put into place. many of them whilst in hospital find coping statergies that helps them with it.

have you tried taking magnesium supplements, they are great and really calm panicking down. i have bee taking them for a while, as i am peri-menopausal and i find they really great.

hope this helps, i think tiff's advice on posting is an excellent one, as it helps relief the stress postively as you can see it written down,


love dorry xxxx :wave:

[flis21]

Hi All,

As agreed this evening on the Friday Night Drink thread I have set this thread up so we can all chat about depression / anxiety and related illnesses and the problems / treatments etc. associated with them.


Just a message from me -

I would like this thread to be a positive and friendly place for people to be able to talk openly about their problems and get support.

[Slayerx]

Thanks for starting the thread :)

[flis21]

Your welcome.

[judi24]

thans great thanks. yes it's great to be able to talk to other that are in similar circumstances or have the same problem with mental health. The problem in out health service is that unless you have severe mental health conditions the help is limited and the taboos are real and everywhere, I think this thread will be really helpful.

[flis21]

The taboos are really frustrating, people don't consider mental illnesses in the same way as physical illnesses. I am sure if we all had physical conditions we would get the sympathy and treatment that we need!

[Slayerx]

Have to agree, I asked for help from GP and it wasn't until I was a threat to myself they offered to help by putting my me on pills.

[flis21]

I agree - I had to get to the point where I had 'suicidial thoughts but no intent' and severe hallucinations before I could get any help and then it is just tablets. I was assessed by some psychiatric nurse to check if they needed to commit me, but because I had the support of my Husband they decided they didn't need to and that was it.

[skintchick]

I was lucky - my GP is great and let me have tablets straight away. I've been off them for quite a while now. I think about six months, although I'm not sure exactly.

I found coming off depo provera (injectible contraceptive) has helped as that was affecting my moods.

I'm sad today but that's mostly external stuff. It's good to have sopmewhere to come though, so thanks for this thread.

I would recommend the book Climbing Out of Depression by Sue Atkinson, which you can get on amazon, as I found it very helpful.

[flis21]

Thanks, will look up that book. I have been trying to come off my medication, and I came off my tranquiliser without too much trouble. I tried coming off my anti-depressant and everything is just falling apart again. Am going back to my doctor next week to ask to be put back on them.

[Slayerx]

I tend to find my depression easier to cope with now, last few years were terrible though dealing with death for the first time and experiencing rejection from someone who I loved all within a short period of time.

I was lucky enough to get help from a friend in Canada, I ended up on prozac and did have some private counselling for a few months.

[skintchick]

I will just warn you that in places it talks about God, but there's not much of that and you can ignore it. The rest is solid advice by someone who's had bad depression, and for me it was the first time I realised other people felt the same as me. It's full of practial help and things you can do, and just general hugging in words.

[judi24]

It's been very helpful tonight, but i have got a tonne of work to do tomorrow so i'm going to get off now. thanks to you all. we should try to keep this thread going. i'm sure there are loads of people logging on here that would benefit from the support.
Goodnight.

[Fat Boy]

All I can add is labyrinthitis (inner ear infection) = anxiety attacks.

My story is long and boring so I won't share it here, all I will say is that with the proper care and attention it can be sorted.

[flis21]

I agree Judi. I have to get off to bed now, I don't sleep well, but make myself go to bed by midnight so I have at least tried to get to sleep!

Well, I will be back on here tomorrow and hope to speak to you all again soon.

Goodnight.

[judi24]

nite fliss. hope you sleep ok

[2 Pence]

Goodnight flis21. :D

[flis21]

nite fliss. hope you sleep ok

Thanks. You too. Have had a few drinks, so should help me get off!!

[skintchick]

Yeah..night from me too. hugs to all x

[Slayerx]

Im off work in the morning speak to you all soon. :)

[Turning_into_scrooge]

Hello

Just wondering does anyone know if you can continue taking the pill whilst taking antidepressants such as prozac, just asking for my friend who is considering taking ad's but like me is plagued with acne and dianette is the only thing that works for us! I know we can't give medical advice but if anyone can provide a link or something with the answer I would be grateful.

Thanks again
Pug

I took the pill with antidepressants and had no side effects at all. I can't take the pill now because the hormone in it caused me to have mylasma(sp) same as cholasma but thats what you get when pregnant. Do a bit of research on google, i'm sure you'll find loads of info on there :)

[Barcode]

The taboos are really frustrating, people don't consider mental illnesses in the same way as physical illnesses. I am sure if we all had physical conditions we would get the sympathy and treatment that we need!

I have found that too many people are either clueless or don't treat illnesses that are not visible the same way as other disabilities. You could break a leg and have people expressing concern. You could feel like jumping off a bridge and be told to 'pull yourself together' which is a ridiculous thing to tell people experiencing depression.

I first took imipramine when I was 16 and have gone through various medications over the years. I've just about given up on them now since most send me into a state that is like a walking coma. Instead, I try to eat properly and take a lot of exercise. It really does make me feel a bit better. I also attend a counselling group which has been a bit more useful.

Don't really want to go into the whys. Only to say that support is available. For many people, the condition can at least be managed.

[Slayerx]

Supports avalaible I've just had a really hard time getting it, thats why I had to get private counselling.

As far as I know I'm on a waiting list wityhe NHS which I have been on for about 2 years on and off.

[flis21]

Which bit of this thread has been a chat about depresssion/anxiety and which bit has been a hello/goodbye chat? :confused:

Sorry Fat Boy, we had spent a lot of the evening talking about this on the Friday Night Drink thread (we kind of took it over), so we decided to set up a thread that we could come back to in the future and talk about our problems.

Also I am a little confused about your inner ear infections = anxiety attacks comment. I have had a lot of anxiety attacks and they are treated by my doctor by giving me a beta blocker. He never mentioned anything about problems with my inner ear. Maybe that is just one cause of them?

Morning to everyone else.

[flis21]

Supports avalaible I've just had a really hard time getting it, thats why I had to get private counselling.

As far as I know I'm on a waiting list wityhe NHS which I have been on for about 2 years on and off.

I think the support depends on who your doctor is, and what is available in your area. My GP has been really good, but support from other areas has been useless. He referred me to the community mental health team, who did an initial assessment (to check I wasn't about to hurt myself or others) then said they would follow up by sending someone to my house to talk more in depth about my problems and find a solution. Well that was back in March, so I am not holding my breath for it!!

[CarolnMalky]

Morning to anyone who is around, what a great thread, means I can come on here instead of burdening my hubby with it all :-)

[flis21]

Morning to anyone who is around, what a great thread, means I can come on here instead of burdening my hubby with it all :-)

Morning Caroln. We came up with the idea for this thread last night as there were so many of us talking about these issues and we all agreed that it was hard to talk to people about it, so it is much easier to come on here and support each other. I also found last night it is quite comforting just to know that you are not the only one experiencing problems.